fluff 18 or soulmates 8 for bai yutong/zhan yao pl eeaasseeeeee i need more sci fic in my life
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SOULMATES 8 “I feel like I’ve died now he’s/she’s/they’re gone.”
fandom: sci 谜案集
The doorbell rings.
Which is weird.
Not because it’s supposed to not be able to ring. After all, it’s a doorbell’s purpose to ring and signal a guest at the other side of the door. No, what confuses Zhan Yao is the fact that he had just moved into his New Yorker apartment a few weeks ago and, safe from his parents, he can’t remember telling anybody his new address. So, logically, by no means should there be a guest.
The doorbell rings again. The shrill sound makes Zhan Yao frown in discomfort. He’s been having headaches for days now and the doorbell ringing doesn’t exactly help.
Another ring.
Who is that and why wouldn’t they leave?!
Well, he could open the door and check and maybe make them leave, whoever this intruder might be. But he doesn’t feel like facing anybody right now, safe talking to them! Hasn’t been for days, if he is honest with himself. He’s been feeling quite miserable. Without a real reason to. And since university wouldn’t start for another few days, he had allowed himself to just … bath in his foul mood until then. Deal with accommodating to a new place and continent step by step. With minimal contact to the outside world.
His eyes fall on the various cartons of take out, plastered over the small kitchen counter. He had to start stapling them, and he must admit – it’s starting to look quite artistic.
The ringing has stopped. Which would be a relief. Hadn’t it been interchanged with loud hammering against the door. Zhan Yao lets out a groan.
“Xiao Yao!! Open the door! I know you are there!”
Zhan Yao freezes at the sound of the way too familiar voice.
But it can’t be! Shoots through his head. By all means, why on earth would Bai Qingtang stand on the other side of his door?!
Despite his doubts, his body is already moving towards the door. It’s like he’s on autopilot. When Bai Qingtang orders you follow. He has learned that early on.
The door swings open and sure enough there she is. Standing there looking unpleased, by her side two identical but unfamiliar faces glaring down at him.
“Hello da-jie, I, eh, wasn’t expecting you?” He starts weakly, but she’s already rushing past him, her two goliats by her side. Zhan Yao lets out a sigh and closes the door.
“Xiao Yao.”
The uncharacteristically sweet tone takes him by surprise. When he looks at her, he sees her two bodyguards having been miracled away and lets out a small sigh. For a moment he relaxes a bit. Until he notices Qingtang’s scrutinizing look on him.
And what kind of image he must make! Worn in and slouchy clothes, uncombed hair, bags under his eyes from all those restless nights. The blue shine only underlining the haunted and tired look in his eyes. He crosses his arms in front of his chest, defensively, as if that could help hiding anything of it.
“Ehm. Why exactly are you here, da-jie? And how did you even know where I live?”
“Finding out had been a bit of a challenge, since you didn’t tell anybody your new address.” She gives him a poignant look and making Zhan Yao flinch. “But”, she shrugs, voice all nonchalant again as she looks around the room, “you know I’ve got my ways.”
Zhan Yao hums in response. Of course.
“And I’m here to check in on you.”
Zhan Yao looks up at that, surprised. He meets her eyes and regrets it immediately. Her view is sharp, an icy fire burning within her eyes and he knows, if he’s not careful enough, he may not survive this encounter.
“Have you been sleeping, Xiao Yao?”
He doesn’t want to answer this.
“When has been the last time you ate anything that wasn’t take out?”
And he doesn’t want to answer that one either (he’s not even sure he could answer it).
“Have you been talking to anybody in the past few days?”
He wants to answer as she adds. “Someone who isn’t a delivery person.”
Zhan Yao closes his mouth again.
Qingtang scoffs. He couldn’t really blame her for it.
“Have you talked at least to your parents since you’ve been here?”
He nods. The first question he can answer. Even if it stings. He still feels uneasy thinking about his last encounter with his parents and-
“When was the last time since you’ve talked to my brother?”
It’s like a lightning bolt just struck him. Zhan Yao is frozen in shock. His mind in panic mode.
She didn’t even mention his name, for fucks sake. And still he –
“Have you talked to Yutong at all since you came here?”
He doesn’t answer. He doesn’t need to it seems. She already knows the answer.Zhan Yao screws his eyes shut, praying for Qingtang to just – disappear. Be gone. To make this all a bad dream, only he would have to deal with.
He’d been ignoring that whole Bai Yutong situation – successfully, too! For weeks! Until she appeared out of nowhere, forcing him to remember and he can’t, he can’t do that right now!
He had believed time would make it easier. Make it easier to deal with the pain. Fill up the hole inside him, that got left open as he boarded the flight to the USA. That time would make him able to forget those tear filled eyes glaring at him. Forget the shouted words, spit out in anger and despair. Make him able to forget the silence afterwards. But it didn’t. He still can see it clear as day. And it hurts. It hurts so badly… It hurts so badly he can’t breathe.
“Idiots!” Qingtang curses underneath her breath. He can’t make out the words after that, but he’s sure about it being curses.
“Sit down.” It’s not a question. Zhan Yao follows.
Qingtang doesn’t sit down, though. She remains on her spot in front of the couch, looking down at Zhan Yao, eyes stern.
“Listen, you know I love you both dearly. And you are entitled to ruining your own lives as much as you like. But as the big sister, it’s also my duty to tell you, when you are idiots. And Xiao Yao”, she stops, waiting for him to look up and somehow he knows it and follows. Her eyes are almost warm. It’s a strange look on her.
“Right now? You are both idiots!”
Zhan Yao breaks the eye contact and looks down at his intertwined fingers instead. He lets out a shaky breath. He knows it. Has known it all along. But he still thought… Well…
“How. How is he doing?” He asks quietly.
Qingtang scoffs. “Yutong? He’s pretty miserable! Which you would know if you would still talk to him!”
Zhan Yao winces at that.
“I thought-“, he lets out a shivery sigh, searching for the right words. “I thought it would be easier like this. For both of us.”
“So? Tell me. Is it easy?”
“No.”
“No?”
“No! It’s not! I feel like I’ve died now that he’s gone!” Zhan Yao blinks, surprised by his own outburst.
To his even bigger surprise Qingtang smiles.
“Ah! There it is! Who would have figured, mh? And although it was you, who left!” She leans in. “But you know what? Neither of you is dead!” She pats his cheek.
With that she straightens up again and calls for her terror twins, who appear out of nowhere at both of her sides.
“Fix this! Call him.”
He doesn’t answer. He doesn’t know what to say.
“Call him, Xiao Yao. He’ll answer. To you. He’ll always answer to you. You know that.” She looks at him expectantly. After what feels like forever he sighs.
“Okay.”
A small nod and she already twirls around, ready to leave, only for to stop one last time at the door. She pulls out some dollar bills from her purse and puts them on the desk by the door.
“And get some sleep and a decent meal, okay? Bye!”
~~~~~
Sorry, no actual Bai Yutong in this one! But it simply screamed for Qingtang! :D And since we are in the perfect-fanfiction-world Zhan Yao gets his act together and calls up Bai Yutong. They make up and have a wonderful long distance relationship, until Zhan Yao transfers back home and they are reunited. They live together happily and nobody is sad. The End ♥
edit: it’s on ao3 now. it’s called: idiots.