Special Specimen
Intro:
(Taking place before the raccoon city outbreak)
You are one of the best scientists working under the great virologist Albert Wesker, your a hard worker and that's something everyone knows. However, what people lack to understand is that you are working yourself into the ground weather it was to be noticed or to get back at your verbally abusive family Your mental health has begun to tumble due to your lack of self preservation and you are on the verge of loosing it, however- you are saved by the last person you would have guessed to come save you from your destructive behaviors.
Note
This is purely fluff! Wholesome (out of character?) Albert Wesker and how I personally depict him reacting to a well respected individual reaching there breaking point, I wanted to write sum' a little more on the softer spectrum of things. Apologies for any inconsistencies/poor writing or phrasing, I will continue to polish this fic before I eventually move onto making another one, all constructive criticism is greatly appreciated!!
TW: mention of poor mental health, past verbal abuse, mentions of alcohol
It wasn't like you to feel such intense waves of emotions, at least not like this. You were good at staying calm under pressure, hell some people would say your a master but it's seems as if the projects as of lately for you have begun to build up an immense pressure weighing on your back.
Your colleagues in the unbrella laboratory you worked at would've been paying close attention when you leased noticed it, your difficulty paying attention, the wandering stares into the void consisting of the white walls infront of you, your stuttering and lack of interest; These were little things that seemed to have been making there ways across the whole facility, making its way to your boss; The well respected and feared Albert Wesker.
You were always ontop of up-coming projects, always pushing yourself and always devoting overtime into the silence of the deep of the hours of night to study your findings and work to improve your ability to understand the things presented to you, even if it costed some hours of rest- To you it didn't matter even if you'd end up sometimes taking a nap at your work station, to say you were obsessed with being the best of the best was a understatement you had a passion- a drive to be just as intelligent as your boss the same man that inspired you to be a virologist in the first place.
You were on a journey not just for your company but you were also on a journey to prove your family wrong; That you could make it that you COULD be something in this life, you wanted to make the years of suffering worth it all that money poured into your golden education WOULD mean something and you gave it your blood, sweat, tears and health to be standing here right now.
But you could feel it, you felt it in your chest beat itself into your core with all the baggage it carried haunting you every night in which you'd spend hopelessly in your bed on the verge of tears wondering why you felt such a need to rip yourself apart like this, to overwork and fatigue yourself till your head sometimes was struck in throbbing pain. You were the best in the company, at least- one of the best why did that not feel enough for you? Why did that cold empty tunnel dug deep in your mind still linger like it had since your younger years?
"You'll never be that good, you lack intelligence."
"You can't even hold a conversation, what makes you think you can become a scientist?"
"Just like your father, you are just like him."
You hated it, the way it made you feel so worthless; "I have to be better"...You repeated in your mind, every minor mistake you'd ever make in the day you'd beat yourself up for it.
"Y/N, c'mon let's get outa here. It's already past-"
"I don't have the time I'm sorry, I know it's the weekend but you know how important this is to Doctor Wesker. Can't just leave these calculations unfinished, I don't want to get bitched at; That's all."
You'd say, hiding the exhaustion in your voice with a room temperature; half cup of burnt black coffee, a result of your lack of attention to the boiling pot earlier that morning.
"Y/N you look like your going to pass out."
They'd announce, there eyes contorted with worry as your figure kept slouched over your work station hair disheveled in a messy bun and somewhat shaky from the four cups of caffiene surging in your system your eyes gave away just how near to passing out you were as your eyelids gave away how heavy they were weighing by how desperate you fought the urge to let them fall and allow yourself to slip into a long long uninterrupted rest.
"Just let me work, I'm almost done anyways."
You'd say in the politest fashion you could muster, but it would role off your tongue in a more passive aggressive mutter. not wishing to speak on your lack of self preservation any further, you wanted to be done with this so you could hopefuly get a well night of rest, you could hear them; The hushed whispers of your colleagues listening to your snappy attitude, some would've laughed while others just turned the other cheek doing there damn best to mind there business.
Your colleague rolled there eyes in reaction to your lack of patience, they'd sway off nonchalantly in a manner that could only be seen as 'carefree' something you lacked.
As one by one your colleagues would disappear from the laboratory, you'd be stuck there once again below the flourescent lighting of the lab that would dim only a hour or so later. You'd stare down at your notebook full of numbers and equations and infront of you sets of testing tubes and a sample of black bile under your microscope sitting aside of your notebook, your mind was a fog a thick fog that clouded your every thought. The only sounds that would keep you company were the tapping of your pencil and the occasional sounds of beeping machinery around you, doubt swallowed you whole your eyebrows knotted together as a wave of distressing sorrow stormed your self control, the inability to think beyond the fog keeping you wrapped in incoherent ideas was tormenting and it infuriated you that a little sleep deprivation was causing you to behave like this.
You couldn't figure out a damn thing, the sample you were provided with was impossible to properly analyze you couldn't make a single conclusion without back tracking, without feeling stupid. You could hear your own voice shaping into the ones of your colleagues, into the one of your idol and family. It angered you- saddened you, you just could never feel adequate enough that you could never find yourself being recognized by the one person that's kept you sane for this long even if he's done little to take notice in you, you were delusional enough to think maybe- he would.
You could feel the cold gusts of air from the vents make your skin rise with goosebumps, your lab coat doing very little to keep you comfortable when your tears poured down on your hard work the pencil markings smudging as you'd whimper silently slumped on your hard, uncomfortable seat.
Slamming your fists harshly on the table in a fit of defeat you felt every emotion pour from your closet of self pity, the closet you'd never share the closet in which you'd spend your recent days glued in because your stubborn nature was the same force causing your downfall, causing you to feel like a piece of common rock amongst the gems untouched by man.
No one was here to hear you, no one to question you or comfort you or god forbid- laugh at you what lingered was just your usual lab equipment and computers.
You craved it, the arms of your boss no- your god caressing your shaking- tired body. You wanted to hear him with his voice in your ear, telling you JUST telling you that YOU were doing enough that YOU weren't the words you stabbed yourself with.
You were so lost in your own thoughts that- You wouldn't notice a hand ever so gently caressing your shoulder, it would make you jump rising from your seat in the slouched state you were quick to clean the stains of salty tears that ran down your cheeks.
Your eyes were a light red, irritated from the crying and lack of sleep.
When your head would peer up to the figure standing next to you, it took you by utter surprise to see wesker beside you staring down at you with those mysterious shades that always sat on his face.
"Crying in my laboratory again, dearheart?" Wesker inquired breaking the heavy silence between you two, his tone was soft and oddly gentle considering he was always such a stern; Serious man when interacting during the day it was a total shift in his personality that made you question his motives, you felt he didn't care about you; Hell you felt that you were just as disposable as all your other colleagues as much as you wanted to deny that. But to you it was worth the risk, Your parents asserted you as 'delusional' and 'childish' for ever thinking you could land a job at unbrella to start with, but you wanted to prove to the world you weren't the pinnacle of these nasty titles everyone in your family painted you with, even if you were delusional at least no one would question your mental superiority now.
"I'm so sorry Dr Wesker, I promise it won't happen again." You were quick to compose yourself, sniffling the build up of snot collecting in your nostrils that made it hard to breathe.
"Is that so?"
He asked after a moment of silence, reading you like the open book you'd been ever since you started here. He knew of your preformance better than anyone else, your work and efforts was something so fascinating to study unfold the ways you mumbled to yourself when you were so deep in thought the way you'd always try to present yourself with so much confidence to him when showing off your latest work you were always one of a kind, a ' special specimen ' to say the very least. Even if he didn't want to admit it he couldn't deny the feelings of admiration he had building for you. When you thought you were alone all those other nights where you'd cry in the isolation of the lab, he'd always be watching through the security cameras always watching how you pleaded shouted and sometimes even pulled at your hair how you'd always refuse your pushy colleagues that wanted to drink with you after work or how you'd always chew pieces of gum instead of taking lunch breaks or isolating yourself from everyone else in order to work better.
Perhaps he found you entertaining because he didn't quite understand your fussy nature, maybe it was because he wanted to see just how far your frustrations would take you, but the more that had became of these occurances the more curious he grew to find out the reasonings for you increasingly wreckless behavior even if it may have made you feel discomfort he WOULD hear from YOUR mouth regardless of what you wanted in the end.
"I'll be going now, I'm so sorry to waste your time like this. I'm sure you must be a very busy man."
You asserted, standing from your little stool chair. Once again, there you were cought totally off gaurd the firm grasp of his leather cladded hand wrapped around your wrist had you take a few glances at him in confusion your mouth gaping just enough to see your teeth and eyes wide like a deer cought in the headlights. His gaze just lingered locked on yours and you could see the dumbfounded expression on your face reflecting back on his shades but no matter how hard you searched his eyes could never be spotted through the pitch black lenses.
"I want an answer, why is it do I find one of my best scientists in such disarray?" He asked, his grip on your wrist not tightening or loosening.
Best...scientist...?
"Sir, with all due respect; I promise it's nothing." You tried your damned best to shrug it off, you've already damaged whatever good your image was. your silly problems wouldn't matter, you thought- "He's too busy to actually care" you'd chant those vicious lines to yourself until you'd find yourself being brought to the reality of the situation his oddly gentle tone wrapping your lonely heart in a metaphorical blanket.
"I won't stop until i get a answer Y/N." He persisted, gently tugging your arm his voice remaining in that calm voice that had you feeling a little unease, it was almost...uncanny. His tone warming you from the inside out.
You didn't have a choice at this point, you knew you'd only wear down his patience with your stubborn words of defiance, something you knew he despised yet here he was taking his sweet time with just another employee of his.
"I just need some time to think sir, I really just need to clear my mind that's all."
You tried to say, surely pushing his buttons when his grip would eventually tighten yanking your body sharply forcing you several steps closer to his body. Eyebrows furrowed and teeth grinding together, you could feel his own strings of self restraint and tolerance snap at your tenacious attitude, it was carefully making him regret coming to initiate any kind of talk with you and the longer you stalled the more time he believed to be squandering.
"If you don't tell me Y/N, I'll insure your time here will come to a swift end."
He threatened, your body was only a few centimeters away from his you could hear his gentle breathing and watch the way his chest effortlessly rised and lowered even through his gritted teeth and the sudden sharpness to his tone the way his threat carried out like a scalpel blade running through your thick skin of stubbornness didn't feel like it carried much real weight at all, but you would be lying if you didn't say it stung like a papercut.
That was enough to bring you to your senses, that crack of patience wearing itself out. The tiniest hint of that smirk ghosting across his cheek now weighing into a gentle scowl, your stomach felt a bit sick just realizing how far you pushed the man made you want to run away and hide forever, run away and just find a new fucking job that wouldn't make you feel such disdain every day. But that couldn't have been an option, you made your bed now you had to make peace and lie in it.
You felt the words pool at your throat, you didn't know where to begin or if you ever could in this moment your voice wanted to elaborate every sensation coursing through you but the only way you could speak is if you lost control of your ability to keep your tears restrained- which in ways you did.
"I just...I just don't feel like...I'm enough...I feel so hollow like...like I just can't...I CAN'T..." your words choked out as you'd hold back the many tears creating rivers of defeat down your cheeks.
You felt so tiny, so lost and disgusted with yourself for breaking down like this infront of your boss, you felt wesker's judgement weigh heavy on you in ways you couldn't describe it hurt in millions of ways letting your words tumble from your lips you felt embarrassed and ashamed and you were so prepared for the lecture of your life when you realized you couldn't stop yourself from blabbering on and on nonsense about your feelings.
After sometime of just listening to you in total silence, eventually wesker would've placed a gentle hand on your cheek cleaning away your endless stream of tears with his gloved fingers.
"I think I've heard enough..."
He said, his other hand gently snaked around your waist pulling you into a much closer embrace till your head was against his chest. For the time being; Watching you stain his expensive clothing didn't seem to bother him like you thought it would've, he didn't pay mind to when you'd sniffle and pant in a desperate attempt to calm down he'd just let you do what you wanted because even if he didn't entirely understand the ways you felt he did his best to pacify your heartache in one of the few ways he knew how.
His hand gently ran through your hair, taking slow steady deep breaths he was trying desperately to be patient doing his damn best to not treat you the same ways he did to everyone else because he truly couldnt bare the thought of pushing you off your limits. At this point you didn't realize the way your arms desperately held onto him like a child seeking validation from there parents your curled fingers wrinkling the back of his lab coat, your nose nuzzling mindlessly into his shirt.
"I'm so sorry sir...I'm so sorry I'm such a fuck up!" You whimpered with quivering lips, you hated this so much- you hated it yet here you stood, practically begging for the validation that was sitting at the back of his throat.
"Shh...it's quite alright, you've done enough. Your work is acceptional in ways I cannot begin to describe, its because of you this division is able to function."
He'd say, slow enough for you to take in every word and also because he was internally scrambling to find the best words to sooth you to begin with.
"Really sir? You think that?" You asked, your eyes hesitantly glazed up to meet his you searched desperately through those damn glasses to see even a minuit detail of his eyes to see through them so you'd know for certain his words weren't just bullshit being tossed at you to keep you quiet.
"I mean it, not many of your generation behave the way you do or work the way you do, It's not your fault so many people cannot reach the levels of success you've obtained. But it's wise for you to know; That you absolutely cannot abuse yourself just to prove a point, to prove your own theories right that you can go for hours working on crumbs of rest and still be the best version of yourself I know you are, because you are just..."
He could have let it slip, he could have said it 'could have simply cheapened your worth to the level of a specimen like he planned to in the beginning, but he'd once again bite his tongue he wouldn't let you hear that word he wouldn't let you become it...not now at least.
"Just a human."
He said, listening to your breathing slow and steady out.
You felt the warmth in his voice fill your empty glass heart, pouring water to keep it full and content. His words repeated in your mind like the record player in your room playing that one favorite song of yours on repeat keeping you company, his presence right here and now was like a light shining down a tunnel full of monsters keeping your fragile self safe keeping you from complete; Irreversible self destruction.
You could hear the hammering of his steady heart beat, it was a sound unlike any other like the bang of a drumbeat or the crackle of furious thunder. Taking in a deep breath the scent of his expensive cologne lingered in your senses while the exhaustion you would have been fighting off for so long would have been taking its course over your aching body and mind.
You couldn't deny his words, if he was telling you this there must've been a truth as for him to even talk to you like this for him to even hold you like this...it must've been something, you didn't have a reason to doubt yourself now not when his fingers gently patted your little head.
"Perhaps you should take your leave my dear, I'll finish where you left off."
He offered, no- he insisted. He wouldn't allow you to keep pushing yourself, to keep going the way you did and pull yourself into your own grave via overworking. He still needed you, he just couldn't let his most valuable asset fall into crumbling bits infront of him and not do a single thing about it.
"Ok..." you'd almost hesitate, it felt like you were letting go of a heavy burden and you almost felt ten pounds lighter just by saying that very simple word. You felt as if you'd regret it, that you'd find a way to overwork yourself again after this, because you had to prove yourself that you could be the best that you were worth this sacrifice of his own rest he was making.
Patting your shoulder, Wesker's lips curled into what seemed to have been a very soft, but present smile of reassurance.
It wasn't long till you'd find yourself in a deep state of rest on your mediocre bed, normally it took a while to get yourself comfortable in that old thing, but not tonight Your own fatigue was what maybe had blessed you, or cursed you because when you'd finally snap out of deep sleep. You'd realize that you had been at least running three hours late. Your hand brushed over to snatch your phone into your hand from the nightstand beside you, pressing the power button the numbers flashed at you reading exactly;
"10:35 AM."
Your stomach felt like it dropped, your small intestines felt as if they were being crocheted and your heart felt like it just exploded from a grenade of panic, your blood felt as if it just drained from every orifice and was replaced with embalming fluid.
You almost forgot about the disaster which was last night, the memories slowly cought up to you whilst you'd fumble with your clothing and hair. You didn't know what to feel, at least not yet you were sure to hear about it from your co workers and boss. I mean...The adult world was no different from your dreaded years of high-school, it didn't matter who was present and who wasn't because these walls had ears. Even if your little mental breakdown was a show for Wesker's eyes and ears only, you could only comprehend the possibilities of your name going around with vicious lies and jealousy, jealousy because it was you that got his attention more than anyone else in that lab.
As your painful heals clicked down the tile flooring to the main center of the lab, you'd use your badge to scan yourself through the doors and as they automatically open you would have been holding in a breath of air. Fear was all you could feel in that particular moment, fear and apprehension to move into the lab but you would've found yourself surprised at the lack of interest they payed to you there busy bodies and minds keeping up with way more important things than noticing your fashionably late presence.
"So you actually got some sleep for once? I don't think I've ever seen you look so well rested in months, jeez...you were starting to look like one of those damn testing subjects for a sec there! I was starting to get worried we would've had to contain ya at some point." Your colleague from yesterday, in a rather disturbingly lighthearted manner announced in his upmost obnoxious tone. Hell, you were surprised no one was talking about HIM or if they were; They were making a damn solid effort not being noticed in doing so.
To compare you to a victim of all those failed test runs took you aback, you weren't sure if maybe he just couldn't hear himself talk or if the alcohol he loved drinking was killing his braincells. You were certain it was, because what mentally sound individual can speak about those weeks of messy trials causing so much havoc so casually? And so jokingly?
All you could do at that moment was let out a very (noticeably) forced chuckle.
"Ya, I was able to catch some hours of sleep. Didn't expect it myself honestly, I'm going to start my work ok? I'm already late." You said with a nervous smile, passing by him in a hurry to get to your work station.
As you'd approach your work station sitting a bit away from the others, you noticed a crimson red bouquet of roses, a box of assorted chocolates and a black little box with a gold symbol ontop of it.
At first, you'd have to take a second glance at the station you hovered over to insure it was the right one, and sure enough it was. Looking at the roses, you had never been so confused before, your eyes investigated the people around you and wondered if there was a secret admirer lurking amongst the large group of fellow scientists. You questioned who in there right mind could possibly ever fall for someone like you? You were a hot mess that needed the hand of your BOSS to finish YOUR work , if that wasn't wreckless to you then you were lost.
Picking up the leather textured box, you'd carefully slip the lid off insuring that everyone could care less at that point to notice probably ignoring you in part because of your little lash-out towards that (well deserving) ignorant 'colleague' if you could call him one at all.
Once the lid slid off, your eyes widened in awe your lips parted as your fingers gently ran over the delicate metal. It was a rose gold bracelet, intricate details danced across the metal appearing as flowers that would have held little crystals in the centers to give the flower accents more appeal and elegance.
You didn't know who could spend this kind of money on some emotionally drained loner like yourself, you didn't deserve these gifts- not a bit. You felt that gifts should only be given, and not received. At least to you this was a philosophy you lived by, internally you felt a tinge of guilt. What if this was really for someone else and you were ruining a surprise never meant for your glassy eyes to begin with? The sender must've gotten mixed up with someone else, that was the only logical explanation.
You probably would've tucked the bracelet away in it's box and hurried in search for its more rightful owner if it wasn't for the black envelope hiding unmistakably under the bouquet of intricately placed roses that were bunched up together by a red bow.
Pulling the envelope to closer inspection, you could see your name written in cursive in what seemed to be a fountain pen.
Yea, this was for you. It wasn't some poor misplacement by any means, your curiosity couldn't have been contained all thoughts of your work was pushed to the side to study this letter and its contents.
Opening the letter, your eyes followed the cursive handwriting staining the light colored beige paper. It would have read;
"Dear Y/N, I have scheduled a private conference between you and I.
You are expected to reach my office at 6:00 PM sharp, I wish to see you in your best attire and wearing this bracelet I've personally chosen for you for this appointment.
Do Not Keep Me Waiting
Signed
A.W"
You weren't sure how to react, you weren't sure weather you should pinch yourself because your whole body became weightless reading those words. You could imagine his velvety tone of voice saying this to you, you were so lost by that letter that you didn't realize the stupid grin growing on your flush red cheeks. Your boss, a conference with you? The vague way of his wording could have meant anything; A promotion, a simple chat, maybe even a date. You wouldn't know until later, way later. But you were willing to wait, you were willing to work the time away until you'd reach the deadline of yet another day.
Wesker could only watch through the cameras, your bright toothy grin, your dreamy eyes and the way you moved with excitement and anticipation in your seat. Even if you didn't work the same way you normally did, Wesker was still cought up in your little antics your attempts at staying focused on your piling tasks was a bizarre delight that he indulged shamelessly in, because to him you were his
special human being.