@scmethinginthewater doesn’t understand the concept of private property.
ever since ivan’s first run-in with eve laurier, he had been a bit... jumpy. paranoid. hypervigilant to an extent that most people might have called just a teensy, tiny bit crazy. for months, any small noise in the middle of the night sent him into a panic. nowadays, though? nowadays it only very nearly did. only. nearly.
ivan wasn’t sure what had shattered. all he knew was that it wasn’t a typical night-time noise, it woke him up rather abruptly, and he was dreading checking it out.
at the same time, though, he wasn’t going to just let some weirdo rifle through his shit. was he? fuck no. that wasn’t going to fly with him. not at all. with his feathers sufficiently ruffled, he stealthily dragged himself out of bed and crept toward the source of the noise.
he wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but the sight of a silhouette ravenously ransacking his fridge wasn’t... quite what he’d had in mind. for starters, the silhouette wasn’t very... eve-shaped. were it not for his need to be stealthy, he might’ve let out a sigh of relief.
before he knew what he was doing, his fingers had found the light switch. he flicked it upward, the kitchen suddenly illuminated in unnaturally white light.
“what the- the fuck are you doing in my house-?!”














