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what if i wrote steven au monologue. oh wait

"Do you know that I love you?" "…" "…do you know how much joy you bring me every day, visiting and encapsulating me in a blissful silence? I wonder, sometimes, if you've ever known anything but sorrow in that little mind of yours." "I want to love you like all the humans do. Like a treasure, something that should be…well, treasured. I suppose there's no better word for it." "…I guess you do not exactly have the capacities to listen to my rambles in your sleep." "Maybe it'll worm it's way into that thick skull, how much I love you, and how much joy you bring to me. Maybe you'll never know it, maybe you'll never know my love. That seems like such torture, to never know love." "…" "…I hope I can at least teach you to love yourself. If not to accept love, at least to tolerate it. Maybe not from others, but perhaps from yourself." "…I sound like a madman. A mad merman, struck with the kindness of a human stranger. The human stranger that makes me want to survive." "…" "…please hear me in your slumber. I would love to keep seeing you. Please do not fall from me, ok? Do you promise?" "…" "…I suppose that's a silly thing to ask. I will assume you agreed, and I will hold you to it, I promise. I love you more than any human."

"Please know that, somewhere in that blasted thick skull."

#steven strangled red #strangled red au #its a fantasy au. and im very gay about it #scratch.txt

love to post about making art. would love to make some someday

#scratch.txt

i know i haven't posted on here in one thousand years but i just had an idea for the most spine tinglingly homoerotic drawing pose ever and i just have to figure out who to draw it with you people aren't even ready

#i'm thinking thoschei so like 67% chance it's actually ''straight'' but shhh #idea came from a different homoerotic thoschei drawing i've been trying to finish for the past like two years so #scratch.txt

tw for implied death and stuff because yah

Hey man, it's me, I uhh….

The baby had stopped crying by the time Jude made it to the house. He had heard Adam crying over the phone earlier, he swore he did. Guilt bubbled in his stomach as he knocked. No answer. "Lynn?" He called. No answer. As he went to call her, the door creaked open. His footsteps, treading carefully upon the hardwood floors, shook as he looked inside. The phone was dangling from the receiver, ringing uselessly. "…Lynn?" He called out again. Music began to play.

Just wanted to call and…I dunno, catch up with you I guess and tell you some stuff.

Opera music. Lynn's favorite. So she must be home. She must be. Jude continued on, stepping around toys left on the floors- trains, small angels, toys with ominously jingling bells and jester hats and lambs. The opera music got louder. It was coming from the nursery.

I'm off my meds today, and uhh. There's a dead body in my house.

"Lynn? Where are you?" Jude's voice felt scratchy and hoarse as he tried to open the door. It was locked. "Lynn?" He banged on the door, saying her sweet name louder and louder until it was all he could think about, desperately banging on the door for an answer that would never reach his pathetic ears. The angels do not smile on him today.

And it's really. Starting. To cause. Me. Issues.

"Lynn…" He called out hoarsly before collapsing beside the nursery, knowing what became of her now. He hadn't seen it, but he knew. She was gone. His son was gone. His life he had, gone. Nobody to call to, nobody to answer his prayers, but the angelic singing in the room sounded more and more like her.

If you'd call me back, that'd be. Great.

And it was driving him insane, knowing that God only wept for her.

#wrote this blurb for rat hq and i really liked it :3 #jude tmc #lynn tmc #toxic ass couple. love them #scratch.txt

ok so update i am deciding to merge ch 1 and ch 2 together of chosen to return. bc i dont like how weirdly the flow goes. so yeah. a real ch 2 coming soon

#chosen to serve au #note.txt #scratch.txt