5, 11, & 16
5. Who do you think started having romantic thoughts about the other first, Mulder, or Scully?
I’ve gone back and forth on this so many times, and I’m not even mad about it because it was, in actuality, really good fic and fan analysis rather than canonical events that made me question it. Initially, I was convinced that Mulder did but over the years I’ve really come to question that assumption. I think I always assumed he did because, you know, , but really one of the most fundamental things about Mulder is his single-mindedness. I don’t think it’s much of a leap to say that Mulder acknowledged and admitted and perhaps conveyed romantic interest/feelings first, given his personality — but I actually think Scully felt attraction first. In the Pilot, actually. But I think she completely suppressed it, refused to acknowledge it, probably felt guilty about it, or like she was such a cliché, etc.
I also like the idea of thinking Scully was empowered by it eventually. I always got the sense that deep down, despite being portrayed as somewhat hyper-sexualized (porn), Mulder didn’t really know what he wanted in love. I think his sexual desires drove him because they were obvious to him and fairly easy to meet. Part of me thinks that — as sappy as it my sound — he didn’t really understand love (in the nuanced way that’s necessary to really feel and be healed by it) until he examined his relationship with Scully.
I think Scully did know what she wanted and needed in terms of love, but I think she grappled very heavily with it throughout her life. I think she knew before she let herself know how she felt about Mulder. I started a fic about this a million years ago and maybe some day I’ll finish it, but there’s a section that incorporates this headcanon I’ve had forever about a story Maggie Scully tells Mulder at some point before Scully has explicitly told him she loves him:
“Before Dana left for college she broke up with her high school sweetheart. We were in the kitchen. She was writing her name in all of her new anatomy and biology textbooks. I was making dinner. I knew she’d let the boy down easy. He was a nice boy, but they weren’t serious. They were just kids. I asked her if she wanted to talk about it and she said — in that self-assured way that you know well; she’s always been like that — she said, “It’s okay, I didn’t love him or anything.” And I asked, just to satisfy my own curiosity really, ‘Well now, how do you know that?’ and she sighed and said, “Oh, Mom. I’d never fall in love with someone who doesn’t have something to be passionate about besides me.”
11. What is the first episode of the show you ever watched?
I was very, very young when I happened across it, while it was still on TV, and I know I started watching somewhere around ‘98/’99/2000 (so probably sometime in season seven?). But the first episode that I vividly remember watching (which must have been on in reruns, or I rented earlier seasons from the video store on VHS or something) was Eve!
16. Tell me a fond txf-related memory.
After the series ended but it would be on in reruns every night (on Spike or SyFy, one of those networks) my first little middle school boyfriend and I used to call each other on the phone and watch it together. We did the requisite Mulder and Scully Halloween costumes and the first time I ever dyed my hair Scully red was at his house, haha!
X-Files revival asks 👽