Dunno why I love drawing Sedj so much given his hair is a pain but I just really do.
This one is based on the idea that Sarake’d learns the difference between “Dressing sexy” and “lazy teen’ when it comes to his most extroverted son. Much to Sedj’s confusion at first. Like why is his halter top problematic but crop top and short shorts is no biggie.
Not sure what he’ looking at so softly here but he;s definately more relaxed than I’ve ever drawn/written him before.
Sedj’s turn to be all ‘grown up’ and making his living as a dancer. my excuse for the wonky chair is it’s space the chair is meant to be wonky for the dance.
“letting teens express themselves and explore is important to their development, and it's very important for three boys who are learning what it means to have autonomy over their own bodies.”
Something about this comment from @deskgirl when discussing our space!AU characters just stuck with me and I’ve been kinda pecking at this between Holiday crap. It’s just the different ways my space trio are learning to just be people, or to find value in themselves as such.
In surprising contrast to his exuberant attitude Mateudj was militantly conservative in his apparel, long sleeves and dark colors seemed to be the only things he felt comfortable in. The looseness of the garments and his small stature made the youngest teen seem even younger and allowed him to hide practically in plain sight when he tucked into himself. He rejected any and all garments that could possibly be considered feminine with an extreme prejudice that seemed colored by fear. He did however wear his hair just long enough for a short ponytail or braids done by his brothers.
Sedj was the opposite in every way, his wardrobe was all about being the center of attention and getting every eye in the room on him. Even the outfits that covered more of his body were designed to titillate and arouse anyone he came in contact with. He spent hours on his hair alone sometimes dragging his brothers into the process coming away with his waist length hair in elaborate styles which always covered his left eye
The trick with him Sarake’d was discovering was finding the balance of what the teen wore verses how he wore it.
He learned how to spot the difference between artfully tousled locks and actual bedhead or when Sedj was wearing short shorts to seduce verses when he was just being a lazy teenager.
The former was cause for correction while the later only earned soft exasperation.
Madje’s problems came from a completely different quarter than either of his brothers, regardless of what he wore he was too big to miss.
As a result, he didn’t care in the least about clothing, he would wear anything from black to, in one notable case, vibrant yellow so long as it served the function it should. The trouble seemed to be that he treated his own body with the same disinterest, for all that he was the oldest of the three he had the least experience in healthy self-care.
Left to his own devices he only consumed what Sarake’d had come to learn was bare minimum rations for their species. It was abundantly clear that he needed to learn that his health and well being was worth as much as his brothers’
The first time he had taken seconds and even thirds of the higher quality syrups his brothers preferred unprompted Sarake’d had nearly cheered. Instead he simply patted the eldest boy’s shoulder in passing.
I want to hear from you... something about our space AU. Hear me out. I challenge you to write about at least one of your boys. They've been on Sarake'd's ship with him for a few months now. So at that point, write what your OC imagines their future will be. And then write what it actually ends up being.
“You can have the stars.”
It was a tiny thing Sarake’d had told him when he had given Mateudj his holo-paint pad, but the words had been treasured as much as the gift itself. Mateudj had neverbeen allowed anything that was his. He and his brothers had been borninto a systematic oppression that made their race little more thanslaves. Products, not people, to be sold to the deepest pockets then passed off when the novelty was gone. He had known no other life than one as a sex toy to the rich who had even stooped to taking his legs. You didn’t offer your toys anything. Sarake’d had done nothing but give. Freedom, a home, a holo-pad, his own room with a lock, and the most surreal of all was his apparent care and affection. As a result the tiny kernel of hope Mateudj had always managed to keep deep inside was starting to grow into a full fledged flame. He couldn’t be sure what the future would hold but he didn’t want to be anywhere but this ship, he wanted to paint and map every journey. He wanted those stars, and he was starting to think he could actually have them.
“You’rebasically my kid”
Sedj had no idea what to do with someone who had no interest in himself or his brothers in a sexual manner. Sex was a language and currency he understood when dealing with people other than his brothers, more than that it was something he enjoyed immensely, despite his past. Sarake’d’s rejection had stung and made him more than a little suspicious, no one had said no to him before unless they had other designs in mind. Sarake’d did nothing but treat all of them like his own. He fussed, he set rules and he scolded when those rules were broken but he never did anything to actually discourage anything they had an interest in. He had even complimented his skill at dance though the style was far from respectable. It made Sedj wonder if he couldn’t just carry on with his preferred hobbies in a more legalized and regulated form. There were plenty of systems where whoring and dancing were respectable and even protected professions. He had awhile yet to consider however since as far as he knew he and his brothers still didn’t exist on any record and these things would take time. He was surprised to find he did believe Sarake’d would find a way to make them real people.
“Everything is good. You’re safe now.”
Madje was a soldax, larger than a great many humanoids and a battle scarred gladiator besides. He had never been told he was safe before and he most certainly never would have believed it. Yet Sarake’d had proven it several times already. He had gotten rid of the man that had bought them last. He stayed with them when Mateudj nearly died of food poisoning. He had even gotten them something like justice for the footage of their beatings and rapes. With Sarake’d they were actually safe, Madje could trust his brothers’ with the older man. That left Madje able to consider his own future. He knew what he wanted,It was the one thing he had always wanted as cliché and stupid as he had always considered it. Burying it deep under the need to survive and keep his brothers safe, even happy, to the best of his ability. He wanted someone or even someones who could love him and care for him just as much as he could for them. He could do any work that required strength and could go anywhere as long as he knew his brothers were safe.
This line from the live action Cowboy Bebop would not get out my head.
Basicly Sedj doing some routine in a honey gold silk wrap and ‘starshine’ overgown.
Also based on pinup Zeppelin by Greg Hildebrandt
🎶 I don't give a damn
I've let my emotions go
Fuck being a sober hoe 🎶
Art, title and Lyrics all inspired by or from
Addict (song by Silvia Hound video by VizziePop)
Probibly the youngest I’ve drawn Sedj though he is a teen, hence the slimmer than usual build. Also his much shorter than usual hair.
When Sedj is in his element trying to survive he really can be mean as hell.
this story was prompt and helped along by my lovely friend Thes
If you want to write a scene, consider: Sedj having a Moment (first attempt at teen rebellion? Venting because he’s unhappy? Getting drunk and trying to score a one night stand to ignore his own trauma looming over him?) and when Madje says he’ll go get him, Sarake’d tells him to stay. He’ll get Sedj.
It’s the work of about 3 weeks which is honestly the longest I’ve stuck with a story in a long while. The title is defined as “ a medicine, especially one that is not considered effective, prepared by an unqualified person.”
Picked because I discovered Sedj comes with Two songs in this story
Desire by Meg Myers and Antidote by Faith Marie
It’s Kinda a rough one so putting it under the cut.If you’re familiar with my beestrix characters you’ll know why, nothing graphic just mentions of past trama and poor coping.
The bar in question was the kind of middle ground one could only find on a space station, somewhere the high class could slum it with the common while those from below could get a taste of the better life.
Sedj irregardless stood out.
There was something desperate about the teen sitting at the bar. He was dressed with flash, a golden top with a plunging neckline that framed his chest rather than covering it drawing more attention to his pierced nipples and practically pooled in his lap which was scantly covered by his barely there holographic shorts. In the few minutes Sarake’d had been watching he had witnessed several men approach only to be shot down.
That was the biggest difference, more than the desperation, there was a meanness to Sedj the Bygon hadn’t witnessed before.
His rejections had fangs and a bite that coupled with his look came off as far more dismissive than needed.
If the teen looked the part of a peacock he had the attitude of a feral dog, snapping at every hand to come near him.
Making a decision Sarake’d strode over to where his middle son sat and took the empty seat on his left side.
The half-empty glass in front of Sedj indicated he had clearly been drinking but wasn’t drunk yet, the fact he turned his head obviously to check who had sat down spoke volumes as to how far gone he really was.
“What are you doing there?”
The teen tried to sound sharp but ended up sulky instead a child who knows their playtime is over.
“I’m thinking of getting a drink.”
“You don’t drink you’re no fun like that.”
“I’m not here to be fun. I’m here to keep you safe and bring you home. When you’re ready.”
“Well I’m not ready.”
“Then I’ll have one of those cherry temples your brother loves.”
Huffing the teen turned his head back to surveying the room but now everyone was keeping their distance. The was a moment of inner dispute during which Sedj looked ready to charge after the men that had previously pursued him instead he grabbed his own drink and finished it off quickly before attempting to stand, “Fuck it lets just go.”
Shrugging Sarake’d followed behind the most dramatic of his boys a bit relieved force would not actually be needed this time, as he knew Madje often employed the over shoulder method to bring his brother home.
Annoyance fueled Sedj’s pace for the first few halls but as the drink he had finished sunk in he slowed, starting to sway. He gradually came to a stop leaning against the nearest wall with a soft sigh. “Aren’t you going to ask?”
“Ask what?”
“Ask why I was there! Why I wasn’t just jumping the first dick to hit on me! Fuck the first five dicks!”
Sarake'd would be lying if he said he didn't want to ask. Of course he did. What Sedj had done, running off by himself without telling anyone, had been dangerous. Before the boys had come into his life, Sarake'd had never had to worry about anyone but himself; now he worried all the time. He wanted to shake Sedj and demand to know what he'd been thinking.
Right now, though, that wasn't what Sedj needed. He needed someone to care. The anger was a test. It was pain. It was whatever Sedj had been trying to drown in alcohol back at that bar without success.
Sarake'd eased a little closer and spoke, gently: "Do you want me to ask?"
The teen made a soft sound still leaning against the wall, it was so small if the Bygon hadn’t been close he might have missed it “...Please.”
"Okay." Sarake'd kept his voice soft. He leaned in, but didn't move to touch Sedj. "Why were you there?" A pause, and then a second, more important question: "What's wrong, dano' nei'man?"
Sedj tensed a moment before straightening, reaching up he roughly pulled his hair away from his face revealing the scars that crossed his blinded eye, Sarake’d had caught glimpses of the old injury but it had never been presented so bluntly. Work had clearly been done to restore appearances as there were only three distinct lines crossing the socket but the sunken skin made it clear there was nothing behind the sealed lid.
“Because I’m damaged.”
Despite the air of finality with which the words were said they were in in fact the breaking of the dam.
“I’m just a pretty face with a huge fucking flaw that makes me worth less. As long as I hide my scars I can have my pick of fucks, rough trade or the polished elite they all want me. They offer me drinks, credits, money, even just a good time and they are all so crushed when I say no because they don’t know better. If they knew about this they wouldn’t say shit. They’ll expect me to be grateful because who else could possibly want to look at an ugly thing like me?”
The anger and desperation turned to resignation and bitterness as the poison continued to spill from the teen’s lips.
He was shaking arms moving to grip each other hard enough to bruise as if it were the only thing keeping him together.
“They don’t actually want me and tonight I didn’t want them, I wanted them to want, and to be humiliated when trash like me still told them no.”
Sarake’d let out a harsh breath through his nose. His body language was rigid, antennae curled back, tails fanned out and twitching. He didn’t like hearing anyone insult his boys, even when it was them. “You aren’t trash. Anyone who doesn’t see how wonderful you are doesn’t deserve you.”
He slowly relaxed when he realized how he must look. He lowered himself down until he was nearly Sedj’s height and let his tails curl in and around him protectively. He held his arms out, loose and wide in invitation. “For what it’s worth, your brothers and I want you. All of you, just the way you are... no matter how much trouble you cause or how much you make me worry.”
Sedj made another soft sound this one more of a whimper as he moved away from the wall only to fall against the bygon’s shoulder, he softened even more as Sarake’d hesitantly wrapped am arm around his waist. The shaking lessened as Sarake’d’s free hand came up to stroke his hair soothingly, combing the tossled locks back into order though he had to work around the teen’s face being pressed to his shoulder.
Pressing into the contact even as he turned his head Sedj burst into tears.
His boys didn’t cry, or rather on the rare occasion they did they, Matteudj mostly, did so silently making hardly a sound and the minimum of tears.
This was nothing like that.
It was loud and ugly, messy even as the boy keened against his skin.
Gradually as the tears slowed Sedj let his own arms go in favor of wrapping them around Sarake’d in a tight hold as his cries quieted to soft sniffles.
Waiting a little longer to be sure the boy was truly done, Sakare’d shifted just enough that the teen was tucked to his side instead of dependent on the wall, his head still resting on his shoulder.
Letting out a shaky sigh Sedj made no attempt to pull away, “Sorry. Can we just go home now?”
“Can you walk?”
“Uh...”
Sarake’d couldn’t see the teen’s face but he could hear the puzzlement in the sound and feel him shift as he tested his balance, it still took a minute to receive a verdict.
“Not well?”
“Would you like a do’orada ride? Like your brother?”
Sedj might not have known what a do’orada was but he certainly understood reference to his younger brother . He nodded slowly and was mindful of the bygon’s tails as he moved to the man’s back and climbed on carefully.
As they resumed their walk the silent was fragile, not entirely comfortable after Sedj’s outburst. Sarake’d didn’t want to make light of anything the boy had disclosed but he did hope to perhaps give him a little cheer.
“I like your new jewelry.”
Sedj tensed in surprise but Sarake’d could feel his smile as he buried his face into the back of his shoulder. The teen’s outfit may have been all about flash but the trio of gold bees hanging from each of his piercings was a personal homage to his family, one only someone close would recognize. “Thank you.”
