School Quotes: College edition
*gets Starburst thrown at head* Thanks bro! I unironically needed this, I haven't eaten anything today
Do any of you guys have Mr. Deez? / Is he the one who teaches about ligma? / Yep / Yeah, we were actually learning about dragon last week
Time to go make some regrettable life decisions!
Eat my ass! ... Actually not really, you're awesome.
*calmly* Oh, the demons finally got out. / What?? / What? / Huh?? / Huh?
Did you just... throw a stick at my dick?
I will remember you all in therapy
Everyone asks "what the dog doin" but not "how the dog doin"
You know who doesn't have problems? / Me! / You! / Fuck yeah! *high five*
Your family tree is more like a Christmas wreath
*people barking and meowing at each other in the cafeteria*
So how do we get this biscuit wet?
Because I LOVE YOU!! / I love you too! ...but please save money
I don't have time to live! Literally! My organs don't know what to do!
Rhombus, what's rhombus plural? Rhombi? Rhombuses? / *quietly* Rhombussy
I jumped off a fifteen foot wall, flat footed, onto cement. / Why?? / Yes.
Is that your anime titty girlfriend?
Yeah can I get a hefty scoop of that ham and Swiss scrambler? Just- yeah, nice and thicc thanks.
That's the Lorax. Can't you tell? He's so hot (not sure if this is better or worse with the context that they were looking at a drawing of Danny Devito)
Mommy money
*extremely confidently* alcoholism runs in my family on both sides!
She's a bitch, B-I-C-T-H. *20 second pause* ......... Bicth...
I ate paper yesterday
