seen from United States
seen from United States
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ripping off more fanfic ideas
https://x.com/adrienettelvr/status/1980916624871051604?t=NVdMqCBv3qm-DusMyMaTkg&s=19
the magic trick with subs
https://x.com/kamcantwrite/status/1980916829968269370?t=sRrSzgtrAJCvACH5UYYJ6A&s=19
The second one confirms that accidental commands are possible! One of my fanfic concepts is confirmed! Woo! :)
The broken hearted are the best writers
I’m not broken anymore
The Healing Process
I’m not really sure what to call this piece. It’s just how I’ve been feeling lately. We’ve all had a point in our lives where we just feel like we’ve hit rock bottom, but I now know, that once you’re at the bottom there is no where to go, but up. 2014 was a year full of changes for me, it started off amazing, but after a couple months I felt as if I had let someone hold my happiness in their hands. You know, when you make someone such a big part of your life and then when they change, everything else changes too. We never think about that before revolving our happiness around someone else – what if one day they leave? That day happened for me. I felt lost and depressed. I never really wanted to say the word depressed, but I don’t really know what else to call it when you’re so sad that you’re grieving someone who is still alive. I felt like that for majority of 2014, and like the title of this post says, once you lose someone, there is process you go through – the healing process.
See this is the thing, no one ever tells you how to get over the loss of someone who is still alive. You create your own process. For me, it felt like a roller coaster, it still does. It’s a process I’m still going through to this day. There were days where I just wanted to lay in bed, and not face reality at all, but then there were also days where I was like “you know what, I don’t need anyone who does not need me.” After feeling like I’m going through a never ending cycle of sadness, one day, I woke up and just didn’t feel sad. I didn’t feel anything towards the situation. There was a stage of numbness, where you’ve gone through so many emotions, you have no more to give towards your situation. After this, it just gets draining being sad. I got my act together, I read a lot of poems and things about self love (after listening to some Beyonce) and those motivated me more than anything.
This doesn’t mean there aren’t days where I don’t feel sad and hurt. Those days still happen. Losing someone is a process. You lose them every time you see them. You lose them every time you come across something that reminds you of them – a song, a picture, a place. You almost feel haunted by their presence. I realized that nowadays, we think of people as medicine, but people are not medicine. They are not the cure to your insecurities and issues. We cannot use people to make ourselves feel better.
I know how it feels to watch your world fall apart, and not be able to do anything but silently watch, but I promise it gets better. I now know that I cannot keep toxic people around me. They do nothing, but bring me down and bring me back to that same place I was last year. Some people think it’s okay to walk in and out of your life, whenever it’s convenient for them, but we need to learn that if we have enough self love, we would not let that happen. We would not let selfish people be around us. We would not put our happiness in other peoples hands. We would love ourselves enough to be enough. We would know our worth. No matter how sad and hurt you feel, you just have to remind yourself that this pain is temporary, and you are young. It might hurt now, but every day, it’ll hurt a little less and you will heal. You will become whole again.
I'm ready for ya 2015
Looking back at 2014, I've been through so much and I've grown so much as a person. A lot of things changed, but at the same time a lot of things stayed the same. The first couple months of 2014 were amazing, I was on cloud 9, but after those few months I've been at an all time low. I spent most of 2014 being depressed, but I don't want 2015 to be the same. This year is going to be filled with so many exciting and scary changes, but I'm glad I still have my same circle of friends that are going to be right by my side through it all. All in all, 2014 has made a stronger person and I am ready to keep growing and learning. All I want in 2015 is to be genuinely happy, and that's what I'm going to be striving for.
I feel like I'm always giving you the benefit of the doubt, and you still continuously seem to find a way to let me down
I just don't get how someone can be so manipulative, dishonest and fake
Isn't it odd how something that happened so long ago, can still hurt you like it happened just yesterday?
Will this ever stop hurting
