Summary: All this time, you’ve been trying to get Tim to let himself be swept up in your affection, but until now, your attempts have been futile. After coming home injured, you and Tim share an intimate and vulnerable moment.
Words: 3,569
Tim Wright x Female Reader
˚₊‧꒰ა . ——— ˗ˏˋ ✮ ˎˊ˗ ——— ˖ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
Tim isn't an easy person, he never has been; and despite all your efforts, the extent of his change has amounted to less than the bare minimum of what you truly desire.
Even so, you love him, and you are constantly trying to make him understand that he doesn't need to keep wearing that same "mask" around you. It feels almost impossible. But sometimes, just sometimes, when Tim seems to be at his breaking point, when he looks utterly defeated, only then are you able to show him, just a little, how good it can feel to simply let himself go in your arms and in your touch...
You and Tim are close; he always looks out for you, you are something more than just friends. He knows about your feelings for him, and deep down, he feels the same way; he has ever since the very first moment your eyes met, when a knot formed in his chest, throbbing with sudden alarm. That feeling hasn't faded; in fact, the more time passes, the more intense it becomes.
Tim has tried to push you away, to treat you poorly, or to do whatever lies within his power to keep you out of his world, a world he believes you don't deserve to be a part of. Yet he always ends up coming back to you; you are the only good thing, the only pure thing, he ever vowed to protect, even if that meant denying himself your love.
Your love for Tim has never wavered, and it never will. There is no one who knows you as well as he does, and no one who knows him as well as you do. It is more than just an ordinary connection; you could swear that your very soul is intertwined with his, no matter how many times you try to dismiss the notion as a mere delusion, a vague attempt to soothe your own desperation.
No matter how hard you try to find that spark in the eyes of others, nothing compares to the way his tender gaze manages to lock with yours, that fleeting glimpse into a mirror of vulnerability, leaving you convinced that you can actually feel your skin radiating love. If you were able, you would save Tim from the horrors of the world; you would show him just how different things can be, that after all, and despite everything, he truly deserves to see beyond his eyes, beyond that heavy body he drags along, beyond all the pain encapsulated in flesh.
⸝⸝
It was a night like so many others; you were awaiting Tim’s long-anticipated visit, just as always, while cooking something you could share. Tim loathed himself for showing up in such a state, so weak, so on the brink… yet after so much pain, so much exhaustion, even fear, there was nothing he desired more than the warmth of your arms.
He appeared at your door as usual, but he looked worse than ever. His face, the mere sight of it twisted your soul with anguish. You slowly cupped his face in your hands, bringing your gaze close to his expression. After brushing aside a stray lock of hair that lay between your eyes and his, you simply let your hands slide down his chest, slowly drawing him into an embrace.
Tim limped inside, shuddering in pain; he fought with every ounce of his strength not to collapse, as if his soul were the only thing left battling for survival after his weary body had already surrendered. You quickly guided him to the sofa, helping him sit down while you examined the multiple wounds beneath his clothes, specifically, a deep gash in his stomach. The mere thought of his pain made you want to weep. "Tim… how did—" you exhaled in desperation. In an attempt to help him back to his feet, you draped his arms around your shoulders. You felt Tim try to resist, though he could fight no longer.
You helped him, step by step, toward the bathroom, his heavy weight bearing down upon your lighter frame. Finally, he slumped against the wall and slowly slid down to the floor, letting out a soft, silent grunt of pain. You quickly stripped away his clothes and reached for your first-aid kit. You knew Tim couldn't risk going to a hospital or clinic, so you always kept everything he might need to treat his wounds close at hand.
After removing his shirt, you took a towel dampened with warm water and began to gently clean away the blood, as tenderly as you could. Tim clutched his discarded shirt in his hand, gritting his teeth and writhing in silence. He dared not look at you, as if his current state were a source of utter humiliation. No matter how many times you sought his gaze while you continued cleaning up the blood, Tim would look down. You might think it was merely exhaustion and pain, but it bothered you that Tim felt he wasn't worth it, even in a situation like this.
You cupped his face in your hands and forced him to look at you. "Look at me! Look at me, Tim!" He flinched at the sudden contact; instinctively, he took your hand in his, yet he didn't pull it away. As he gazed into your eyes, he stroked your hand with his thumb. "I'm sorry…" he sighed, his breath ragged. He squeezed his eyes shut, as if to hold back the tears. "Tim!" He slowly opened his eyes again, and the unmistakable grimace of pain in his throat made everything come crashing down.
"I'm sorry..." he said again, lowering his head and shaking it from side to side while caressing your hands, which were still cradling his face. He tried to cover his face, but the attempt was futile, impossible with his hands locked in yours and the pain rendering him unable to move. Instinctively, you embraced him, chest against chest, taking care not to hurt him. He wrapped his arms around your body, anchoring his will to you, the only thing that seemed truly alive within him, along with that insatiable, forbidden longing for love.
You could feel how his breathing, though still ragged from his silent weeping, began to synchronize with yours; little by little, as he stroked your hair and back, the frantic pounding of his heart began to subside. You wished that every embrace with him could be this intimate and enduring. Your head rested in the crook of his neck as you inhaled his scent, a scent that was slowly returning to him after having been drowned out by the smell of his own blood. After a while, you decided to pull away; when you met his eyes, you stroked his cheek with your thumb, a silent promise.
You turned on the tap and let the bathtub fill with hot water. You moved back toward Tim, intending to remove his pants, starting with his belt. Yet Tim, blushing with embarrassment, placed his hand over yours; he met your gaze for just a second before sighing and looking away. Even though he desired you, he didn't view you in that way, not in that lascivious, selfish manner. Moreover, even when instinct made him think of you in such terms, he would try to quickly banish the image, feeling unworthy of the pure idea of you that existed in his mind.
Removing his clothes was merely part of the protocol; any form of affection, even beyond the initial intent, was welcome, not to mention that it was Tim, the very person you had yearned for so deeply… Even so, that was all it was; so, you removed his pants, and then, placing your hands on the hem of his undergarments, you met his eyes, seeking his approval. He nodded back, looking slightly sheepish. You tried not to stare too much, so as not to make him uncomfortable, and simply helped him quickly into the tub.
Although you had noticed him resisting many things in the past, you had never seen him look so "defeated" before you, simply letting you do what you had to do as you tried to make him feel better. After stepping into the tub, he let his eyes drift shut with a sigh that seemed to escape him involuntarily.
The tension in his back began to melt away the moment your fingers intertwined with his hair, working in the shampoo. You gently massaged his scalp, making sure to give it a thorough wash. Tim slowly surrendered to your touch, eyes closed, his clenched fists finally relaxing their grip. When you rinsed his hair, he turned to look at you so gently… and for the first time, he offered you a tender smile.
After refilling the bathtub, you decided to take off your clothes, which had already gotten a bit damp. He seemed genuinely surprised by this and simply turned away, trying not to look at you too much. Having shed the rest of your clothes, you slipped into the tub on the opposite side of him, waiting to gauge his reaction.
"Tim" He flinched at the sound of his name, then, looking flustered, he met your gaze. A faint blush rose to his cheeks, something you would hardly have imagined seeing behind his tough-guy facade. He looked away again, still embarrassed, but this time with a little more confidence, seeing your body in this way for the very first time. "Feeling better?" you whispered, gazing intently at him, testing his reaction. He nodded and started to rinse off his body, but you took his hand to stop him. "Don't try to rush it. Don't you want to be with me?" Tim nodded again and lowered his hands. "Tim, just let yourself go a little; it's okay." You shifted in the tub, moving closer to him and taking his hands in yours. He took them without hesitation and wrapped his arms around you, pressing his chest against yours once more. "Does this feel better?" you whispered. "Yes, so much better," Tim nodded, resting his head against yours. "You have no idea how much…"
As you caressed Tim’s back, and he yours, you rested your head in the crook of his neck, just as before, but this time in a far more intimate way. You could feel the softness of his skin beneath your touch, the way his heart seemed to shrink against yours, trapped within that small space. His response was to let his skin melt against yours; after fighting for so long, cornered here, amidst your caresses, Tim had finally surrendered.
You planted a soft kiss on his neck, so delicate… then another, and another. You cupped his face in your hands, stroking his cheeks with your thumbs as you sought his gaze. Tim had never been treated with such tenderness before; you could see it in the way his eyes met yours, filled with that purity he usually had to keep hidden away. You placed a gentle kiss on his eyelid, on his forehead, and on the tip of his nose; at that last touch, Tim flinched slightly, so close…
You kissed his cheek and sought his approval; he nodded, and slowly, you pressed your nose against his, parting your lips in anticipation, only to place a soft kiss upon his own. A small kiss, yet one laden with a multitude of silent promises. You could feel his smile against your lips, so after a moment, you slowly pulled away to observe his reaction. His cheeks were flushed pink, lips parted, and his eyes searched for yours, longing to kiss you again. You could feel your heart pounding against your chest, butterflies fluttering ceaselessly within you, and that overwhelming love that made you want to consume him whole.
You smile and kiss his nose; filled with excitement, you press your lips against Tim’s once more, this time deepening the kiss slightly. You slowly caress his hair, your hands sliding down to his neck to rest there. He holds your waist like an anchor, his thumbs tracing small circles against your skin. You pull away to catch your breath, lips chasing after yours. You look at him, vision hazy, head spinning, offering him a tender smile.
Unable to resist the urge to hold him, you give in and press your chest against his once again. "Tim…" you whisper. "Yeah…?" Tim replies softly, lowering his head to rest beside yours. "What are you feeling right now?" He freezes for a moment; takes a deep breath, and softly says: "I never want to let you go." You plant a small kiss on his neck. "I mean…" He nods and reaches for your face, this time, he is the one to cup it in his hands. "Yes" he says desperately, searching for your eyes. "Yes… what?" you reply, letting out a small smile at the vagueness of his answer. "I love you…" he exhales.
The world seems to come to a standstill at those words. You never imagined Tim would say it like this, you never thought he would be capable of it. Still in a state of shock, lips parted as you gaze into his eyes, a faint blush settles upon your cheeks, and your heart trembles at the gentle touch of his words.
It was Tim who kissed you this time, somewhat desperately, yet still slowly, without diminishing the intensity of everything he had kept bottled up for so long. He tried to deepen the kiss quickly, pressing his tongue against your lips, but you pulled away abruptly in response.
Your experience with such things was nearly nonexistent, not to mention that this was, essentially, your very first real kiss. He froze, searching your expression. "I'm sorry" he said quickly, cradling your face in his hands. You could feel your cheeks growing warm beneath his touch. "I haven't done this before, that's the thing…" He rested his thumb against your lip, gently parting them as he watched for your eyes reaction. "It's okay; we don't have to," he said.
This time, it was he kissed your cheek, your heart fluttering at the contact, as a small, innocent smile blossomed on your lips. "I want to kiss you, Tim." He didn't wait another moment; he planted a subtle kiss on your lips, then another, gradually deepening it without rushing you. His hands caressed your cheeks, then slid down your neck and, little by little, toward your chest. The sudden contact made you flinch against his mouth, letting out a small, silent whine into the kiss.
Tim stroked gently, sliding his hands down to cup your breasts in his large palms, feeling their weight settle into his hands. The overwhelming sensation made you let out another soft, silent whimper against his lips. Your hands sought refuge on his shoulders, pressing down in response to the feeling. It wasn't long before his thumbs began to subtly caress your nipples, feeling them harden beneath his touch. Your fingernails dug into Tim's shoulders as he attempted once more to slip his tongue into your mouth. This time you yielded, hesitating slightly, yet going for it nonetheless.
Your mind was consumed by thoughts of Tim: his hands on you, your mouth against his, your body pressed against his, just like this. You could feel your skin radiating heat, love, and longing.
The kiss was sloppy and inexperienced, but that didn't make it any less wonderful, especially knowing that you were sharing it together in this way. He loved that about you anyway; besides, it wasn't as if he knew much more about it than you did. His hands slowly descended to your thighs, stroking along their length and spreading his palms wide as they went. Trembling at the contact, you broke the kiss to catch your breath, resting your forehead against his as you panted softly. You look at Tim and press your cheek against his, resting your face there. "Tim, no—I’ve never—I’m not ready." He nodded and kissed your eyelid, then your forehead; cupping your face, letting out a soft, faint chuckle. "I can't right now anyway" he said, glancing down at the wounds on his abdomen. You nodded, your hand tracing a subtle path down from his chest to his stomach. Tim panted at the contact, watching as you touched him so tenderly…
After getting out of the water, you helped Tim dry off. With a clean towel, you began to gently dry his hair, taking care to remove all the excess water. Before you could move down to continue drying the rest of him, he took hold of your wrist and gently pulled the towel from your hand. "I want to help." He smiled at you, taking you by the waist and lifting you to sit on his thighs, straddling him.
Using the towel, he began to dry your hair with the same delicacy, ensuring he removed every last drop of water. Before you could anticipate it, he gave a tug on your wrist, pulling your chest flush against his and holding you tightly in his arms. "I love you…" he whispered into the crook of your neck. You could feel a warmth blossoming in your chest, radiating out toward his, your fingernails pressing into his back as you tried to melt into his body.
Tiny tears gathered in the corners of your eyes; you couldn't believe this was real, it felt just like a dream. Little by little, the tears began to trickle down onto his shoulders and back. He pulled away slightly to look at your face, where a goofy, dazed smile was playing on your lips. Tim smiled too, then looked down sheepishly, a faint blush rising in his cheeks.
You laughed softly at his reaction, pressing your cheek against his and dampening it with the last of your tears. You could feel his smile against your cheek, so you pulled back just to see it; when his eyes met yours, he let out a small, bashful chuckle, a sound you mirrored instantly. You both began to laugh; you cupped Tim’s face in your hands while he held yours, laughing like children, so innocently.
For a moment, the horrors of the world ceased to haunt Tim. You could see it in his small teeth, in the way his nose crinkled when he smiled, in all the tiny details of his face: his eyebrows, his eyelashes… God. You wished this moment could last forever, not just in your memory, but in the pads of your fingertips, and in the indelible bite Tim had left upon your soul.
After drying off, you bandaged his wounds, having first cleaned them thoroughly. The tomato soup you had been cooking lay forgotten in the kitchen until you both finally emerged from the bathroom. You grabbed your hairdryer and plugged it into the kitchen outlet, motioning for Tim to take a seat at the small table. You dried his hair, making sure it was completely dry, which wasn't a difficult task, given that some time had already passed since you and him had gotten out of the water.
With his hair dry and clad in fresh, clean clothes, you filled the kettle with hot water to make tea for both of you. You ladled the soup into small bowls, giving Tim a larger portion after such a grueling day. Even after that shared moment, a silence settled between you both, yet it was not an uncomfortable one. Although he was feeling better, he was still exhausted, so you brewed some tea to help him sleep. It wouldn't be much of an issue, you knew that the moment he hit the bed, he would be instantly knocked out, but a little tea would help ensure a deeper slumber.
Once you were finished, the dishes were left forgotten in the sink. You brushed your teeth eagerly, longing to finally let your body sink into the bed beside him. When you were done, you found Tim already drifting off at the small kitchen table, his eyes fluttering, clinging to the last vestiges of strength left in his body. You kissed his cheek before taking his hand and leading him to your bedroom.
At last, cool sheets brushed against your skin as you finally let yourself collapse onto the bed; and while the relief was immense, it paled in comparison to what Tim was feeling right now. You pulled the blanket over both of you, making sure neither of you was left uncovered. He quickly sought your gaze, gently pulling your wrist toward his chest, eager to cradle you within his arms. You could see the love shining in his eyes, and though he always looked at you that way, this time felt different, your chest now embracing the warmth radiating from his body.
Pressed against his chest, beneath the much-longed-for warmth of his arms wrapped around, you can feel your breathing growing slower and slower. This time, it isn't your pillow resting against your chest; this time, it's real. Tim lazily kisses your forehead, resting his face atop your head. You feel your eyes slowly drifting shut, and for the first time, Tim tastes what might be heaven, the very redemption of his soul. Even after all the darkness, love truly did exist for him.
"I love you" you heard him whisper as sleep settled over you.
