#sharpwin meta

[jonsa101]

Episode 3x14: A Reflection of How Max Stepped Into Love After A Season of Suffering

Gif credit @supagirl

Hey guys! I can’t believe the season finale has come and gone! I think my mind is just taking time to comprehend everything that has happened! Sharpwin is officially canon! As I’m typing this out, it feels strange writing a meta on the other side of things. Since season one, I’ve been writing metas about how these two belong together and making predictions about the trajectory of their relationship. Now, to be on the other side of things where I know longer have to do that because these two are finally together is kinda crazy. I feel so elated!

Now y’all, I’m not going to lie to you, I had a totally different meta planned out and that meta is still in my drafts. I will probably release it because it was a general review of the episode but I thought it was more important that I put this meta out first. When I was watching the finale live, I didn’t love it. I just didn’t. I loved that Max and Helen finally got together at the end of the episode but I had a major issue with how it unfolded. The issue my friends was this scene right here: 

Baby!!! When I tell you this scene TRIGGERED me, it did! Now mind you, I wasn’t upset with Max’s storyline of searching and struggling to take off his wedding ring. It is human nature for Max to still have an emotional attachment to his ring. He’s not still grieving but essentially that ring is the only thing he has left of Georgia and represents a life he once had. Him taking it off was always going to be a monumental moment for Sharpwin and for himself. The issue that I had was Max casually telling Helen that he freaked out about losing his ring!!! To me, after the voicemail he left her, after Helen flew standby and was in a six hour flight to see him, it was an incredibly CALLOUS thing for Max to say. I know Max wasn’t thinking in this moment. I know his intentions were clearly not to hurt her but words matter and him being careless with his was a complete disregard of Helen’s feelings. She was deeply hurt and upset when he said this and rightfully so! I mean just look at her expression here:

Helen’s entire being read like

“I can’t believe you”

And girl same, because neither could I!! He knew he fucked up and he obviously made up for it in the end but y’all when I was watching it live, everything that came after that elevator scene was was tainted for me. I had a hard time believing that Helen would let what he said slide so easily and in the moment, I couldn’t appreciate the beauty of them finally coming together! 😩 In my personal opinion, there were so many other ways that scene could have played out without Max having to literally tell Helen to her face that he was worried about his wedding ring! I know they were trying to build up to the “big moment” where he finally takes his ring off and runs back to Helen’s apartment but man, that moment did not sit right with me in my spirit! It still doesn’t and I don’t think my opinion will ever change on this.

With that said, I’ve now done several rewatches of the finale where I specifically watched the scenes after that awful moment by the elevator. As I’ve had time to reflect, my perspective has changed. I no longer view the moments after the elevator scene as tainted but as something deeply profound and beautiful. Hell, even as I reflect on that scene by the elevator, I still don’t like it, but in a way I understand it in how it relates to Max’s overall journey when it comes to Helen. To me, Max Goodwin is a man who fell deeply in love with Helen in the midst of the most complex situations and a season of him suffering. It’s been deep rooted, complicated and messy from the start and over the past three years we’ve seen Max navigate through the complexities of his feelings for Helen and the circumstances he’s found himself in on our screens. I think when you look at season three finale and specifically the journey of Max finally making a choice to be with Helen, you have to put into context Max’s history and how it influenced what that looked like. So y’all that is exactly what I want to do in this meta so let’s dive in.

One thing I think we need to acknowledge is that, even though as an audience we have loved seeing Max and Helen’s journey unfold, the road has been so TOUGH for them. As Helen said in 3x13, it’s been a fight! Especially for Max. The suffering he has endured over the past three years has been unfathomable and much of his relationship with Helen and his feelings for her have been developed under these traumatic and tragic circumstances. 

At the very beginning of the series, when Max and Helen first meet they clash but it doesn’t last for long. It’s his first day at New Amsterdam and as the new Medical Director, he wants her to stay at the hospital and treat patients instead of doing press tours. Helen on the other hand wants to continue doing press and for the most part ignores his demands for her to return to the hospital. When she finally does return, she does so because she learns that Max has cancer. This bonds them at the onset as Helen is the only person in his life that knows about his diagnosis. As an audience, when we first see them interact, we instantly saw the sparks fly between them. Their chemistry and natural witty banter made us immediately take a look at their relationship and what potential they could have in the future. Though we were shocked by his cancer diagnosis, I think the fun and lightheartedness of Sharpwin’s first interactions really masked how traumatic this must have been for Max. On the first day of his dream job, that he sacrificed his marriage for, he learns that he has cancer while having a baby on the way. Those are the awful circumstances that first bring Max and Helen together. 

As Helen becomes Max’s doctor and he swears her to secrecy about his diagnosis, their friendship and bond grows deeper. His passion and drive to help his patients, reignites Sharpe’s love for medicine again and inspires her to put her patients first. They become vulnerable with each other more than anyone else in their lives. He confides in her about his broken marriage and she tells him that she wants a baby. When he almost dies, she becomes his deputy medical director so that he can focus on his care. All of these moments are significant to them because somewhere along the way they develop feelings for each other. They didn’t plan for it and it’s something neither of them are consciously aware of but unknowingly, they both start to fill a place in each other’s lives that was clearly more than a doctor and patient relationship or a friendship. This “place” wasn’t called out until episode 1x16 were the clairvoyant called out their feelings for each other. When episode 1x17 comes around, after a night of revelations and a scramble to get the power back on in the hospital, Helen decides to step back as his doctor. If she wasn’t aware of her feelings before, in this moment, she’s fully aware of them now. This is an effort to safeguard her heart and set boundaries because the lines of who they are to each other were already so blurred. When she “triages” their relationship Max’s reacts badly and honestly they’re both devastated and are on the verge of tears:

As viewers, we loved this moment but when you peel back the layers of what’s actually going on in this scene, it’s gut-wrenching. The subtext is so clear here yet their situation is so complex and layered. We know for a fact that Max wasn’t trying to lose her in ANY CAPACITY. We also know that in the way he TRULY wanted her he couldn’t have her and Helen knew that too. Not when he was married, had a baby on the way, and fighting cancer at the same time. Y’all that’s hard and profoundly painful when you think about it and it makes this scene all the more tragic. 

When Helen steps back as his doctor, at first Max seems to be handling it well but as his cancer starts to get worse, he completely breaks. Like I said earlier, over the course of his cancer treatment, Helen filled a place in Max’s life that was so much more than just his doctor or his friend. So when he’s dying and no longer has the person he feels deeply for play an active role in his treatment, he lashes out. He’s dealing with a range of emotions he can’t handle or properly process. Things only get worse from there and at the end of season one Georgia and Luna’s life are on the line and Bloom and Helen scramble to save them. When it seems like everyone was able to come out of that traumatic event unscathed, they get into a devastating ambulance crash that changes everything. 

Season 2 brings another level of pain and suffering for Max when he loses his wife after the crash and is thrust into single fatherhood. Not only is he grieving but he’s also dealing with guilt of falling in love with Helen while he was married. The complexities of his feelings is something he struggles with throughout this season and it affects his relationship with Helen. At some points he pushes her away and at others he desperately needs her. Once again, Helen and Max’s relationship is caught up in the most complex of circumstances that is riddled with agony and trauma. 

By time we head into season 3, Max doesn’t even have time to breathe or think about his relationship with Helen because they’re both thrust to the frontlines of the pandemic. 

I bring all of this up again to emphasize that there has never been a time where Max and Helen’s relationship hasn’t been wrapped up in trauma or some sort of suffering. It has always been one thing or another with them. It’s been A LOT and Max has tried to navigate being in love with Helen through his suffering and under these crazy ass circumstances. So after rewatching the finale, the questions that run through my mind are:

How do you step into love when all you’ve known for the past three years has been suffering?

How do you love openly and freely when for so long you’ve emotionally suppressed your feelings for someone because it was “wrong?” 

How do you let go, heal, and move on with your life?

To me, answering these questions is what the season finale for Max was all about. When you’ve suffered so much and endured so much it’s not easy to step into a new chapter in your life that’s hopeful and filled with love and possibilities. For Max, I don’t think in his wildest dreams that he ever imagined that he and Helen would be in a place where they could actually be together. Considering everything they’ve gone through, quite frankly it’s a fucking miracle! So when he actually makes it to the other side and not only SURVIVES but has a chance for happiness, I don’t think he knows what he’s doing. Pursuing/having feelings for Helen from a place that isn’t wrapped up in trauma and tragedy, where there are seemingly no obstacles in his way, is totally and completely new territory for Max. I think he’s clueless in how to do that in the right way and as he navigates through that, naturally there are hiccups.

That’s evident with what he said by the elevator and also in this moment here: 

Max doesn’t have a clue but he wants to make sure that he doesn’t fuck it up because he DESPERATELY wants this! I also think there’s something to be said about how we as human beings can self-sabotage ourselves when we finally have an opportunity to get what we want. Fear, guilt, worthiness usually comes into play with that and I think for Max there was definitely a fear with moving on with his life, guilt of surviving it all and having a chance to be with the woman he’s loved for so long, and a question of if he’s worthy of actually having happiness.

Their walk in my mind perfectly embodies him self sabotaging while also trying to navigate his feelings of desperately wanting to be with her. At the beginning of their walk, you see that at one point he clearly wants to hold Helen’s hand but he doesn’t (I would use a gif here y’all but I literally only have room for 10 😩). I’m focusing my attention on Max here because essentially this whole moment between them is a part of Max’s “mini story” in the episode. The ball has always been in his court and truly what we are witnessing is his journey to step into love because Helen is ready and has been waiting on him. 

The most compelling moment in their walk scene for me was this one: 

I find it strange for Max to walk so far ahead when he was the one who asked her if he could walk with her. My first thought while watching it live was “what is he doing” and I think Helen’s expression reads the same way. After analyzing this for a bit, I genuinely think that’s the point of this scene. Like I said earlier, Max doesn’t know what he’s doing. To be with Helen like this is, where its romantic, peaceful and drama free is probably blowing his mind and he doesn't know how to navigate this. He doesn’t know how to receive this second chance at happiness. 

The internal war of Max stepping into love or allowing fear, guilt, and unworthiness to hold him back becomes all the more evident when they get to Helen’s door: 

He knows he wants to come in. Helen know he wants to come in too. This man literally says goodnight twice and when Helen responds with “you said that,” it perfects this scene. She wants him to come in as well but she’s not going to ask him to. In this moment, she sees his internal struggle and she knows that he has to make the choice himself on whether or not he wants to move on with his life with her.

When he walks away, for a moment that was Max choosing to hold onto the pain and trauma of his past. That was him choosing to hold onto the guilt that was keeping him from healing and moving on. With the suffering he’s been through, it makes sense. In many ways he’s been conditioned to fight, to suffer and to endure. It’s what he’s used to. But praise the lord, he thinks of the moments he just shared with Helen. 

The joy he has with just being in her presence. 

The opportunity he has to freely be with her and have a life with her after loving her for so long.

He is not condemned to a life of suffering. It was only for a season. He’s in love with Helen and wants to be with her. Like hell is he going to let this opportunity at a second chance of love and happiness slip away from him. So guys, he slips off that ring, runs back to Helen’s apartment and makes a choice to step into love. Step into this new, uncharted, chapter of his life with Helen Sharpe. 

Anyway guys! I hope y’all enjoyed this! I might be releasing one more meta but we will see how it goes.

As always feel free to reach out to me on Tumblr and on Twitter @oyindaodewale. Love you guys!

[jonsa101]

Thoughts About Sharpwin in Episode 3X14

Hey guys!! I feel like there has been so much pandemonium in the fandom since all of these spoilers and content has come out prior to the finale on Tuesday.  I have revised this meta so many times due to new things coming out every day and I honestly debated if I should even still publish a meta before the finale. Either way, I’m putting this out there because I still have some thoughts to share and it was highly requested by y’all! 😉 As always, I’m going to try and share my thoughts as honestly and as logically as I can. 

Going into the season finale, I think the question we need to ask ourselves is what are the most important aspects of the season finale? For me, I’ve always believed that the time-jump and the cliffhangers would be the most important aspects of the episode and based on what we’ve seen so far, I think that opinion still holds true. True to his words, in this interview here https://tvline.com/2021/05/25/new-amsterdam-season-3-finale-spoilers-time-jump/ , Schulner specifically said that the finale episode would be nothing like we’ve seen before. From yesterday’s spoiler, it’s fair for us to assume that that the episode we are about to see on Tuesday is linear and is a full time jump episode. How long is the time jump? I’m not sure but my guess is that it’s at least 3 months.

Now you might be thinking “what if the time jump is only a week or two?” Here’s why I think it’s not.

Look at this picture with Helen and Mina.

In this week’s episode Helen and Mina were still bumping heads after weeks of Mina living with Helen. They were talking about college applications and it wasn’t until the end that we finally see Helen and Mina put their walls down and start to connect with each other. Again, look at the picture down below! Clearly their relationship has done a complete 180 and they seem closer than ever. Mina is literally on the verge of tears as she and Helen are about to say their goodbyes. That relationship transformation doesn’t take place in a week or so. I personally don’t think it takes place in a month either. That type of transformation and healing takes time. Also, if one of the primary reasons that Helen is in London is to drop off Mina for college that means Mina had to go through the whole college application process which is incredibly long! Mina would have to write essays, take the SAT or ACT, go on interviews and hell, probably go on college tours too! In 3x13, she was just starting that process guys. So, if we are seeing Helen drop off Mina for school, at the BARE MINIMUM it has to be at least a three month time jump. Mind you, I’m doing the bare minimum here because I’m not sure the show would commit to a 6-months to a year time jump, which is typically a standard timeline for the college application process.

Now also look at Floyd’s photo.

He is serving breakfast in bed y’all!!! Do you know what that tells me? It tells me that this man is COMFORTABLE and has been in the midst of his situationship for a while now. Logically, do you think that he can get this comfortable with Dr. Malavo within the span of a week or two especially after the episode that we just saw? No!! A person like Floyd who has gone on and on about his life plan since season one definitely would have had to be worn down for a while for him to be caught up and comfortable in a situationship!

Again, this is just how I feel. I could be wrong but to me I feel like at least a 3- month time jump would be realistic. Moving on from the time-jump let’s talk about these cliffhangers. Y’all I STRONGLY believe that there is a reason why we are receiving so much spoiler and promotional content before the finale. Based on everything we’ve seen, at this point we should all know that we are going to see Helen and Max finally become an official couple in the finale. This is a given! We are all excited to see them finally get together and without a doubt how that unfolds is a huge part of the finale. I just want to make an argument that Max and Helen finally coming together isn’t the most important point of the episode. 😬😬😬 Again y’all, look at the content we’ve received so far! We got a Sharpwin focused promo, a ton of promotional photos, we got that amazing sneak peek voicemail from Max and hell, we even got Ryan Eggold telling Us Weekly that he just felt like it was time for these characters “to go one way or the other! “All of this is great but at the same time it’s super heavy handed! Mind you, in episode 3x12 which was a pivotal episode for Sharpwin, we barely got any spoilers, in fact I think even the episode synopsis was delayed as well. Clearly, I understand that the show hasn’t shown us the most important parts of how Max and Helen are finally going to get together but what I am saying is that they’ve shown us enough to make me believe that isn’t the most important point of Sharpwin’s story in the episode. In the finale for Sharpwin, to me, the question isn’t about if they’re going to get together or how they finally get together, it’s about what’s in store for the FUTURE they choose to have together. Max said it perfectly himself in that voicemail when he said 

I need to see you.

I need to talk to you.

I need to be with you in all the ways I’ve been dreaming about.

That last line is so significant because to me it tells me exactly where his mind and heart is at. Apart from the obvious where Max is clearly thinking about making love to her, I think Max is also dreaming about having a life with her. Again y’all! From episode 3x12 an onwards the question has never been about if they want to be together. It is clear that they both WANT THIS. The question is what that looks like for them and where they go from here after they come together. There are a lot of important conversations they need to have and decisions to be made, hence Max’s “I need to see you,” and “I need to talk to you.”

This brings me back to the cliffhangers. In the article I linked above, Schulner made it a point to emphasize the importance of cliffhangers this year. According to him there should be at least five cliffhangers in the season finale. In my mind, that means all of the main characters should have a cliffhanger that immediately sets them up for their main storyline in season 4. Especially considering the fact that the season 3 finale will already be a time jump episode. So, if the finale is centered around Sharpwin and we know that we should expect cliffhangers, shouldn’t we expect that Max and Helen will probably have a big cliffhanger that impacts their relationship going forward? It wouldn’t make sense for Iggy, Lauren, and Floyd to have these pivotal cliffhangers in finale while Max and Helen just end up as a happy couple. I could be wrong but that logically doesn’t make sense to me. We should totally expect them to maybe have the biggest cliffhanger out of everyone else since technically this episode is mainly about them! I like to think that Max and Helen have a collective cliffhanger but it’s also possible that they have cliffhangers as individual characters and those cliffhangers effect the trajectory of their relationship. By the way, I’m absolutely expecting a positive cliffhanger/cliffhangers for Max and Helen. I truly do believe the best is yet to come for them! All I’m trying to say is that I think this is going to be the most important part of Sharpwin’s story in the season finale. Not how they finally get together! 

For me, one of the big things that sticks out that could play a role in a collective Sharpwin cliffhanger or an individual cliffhanger is Helen’s trip to London. I predicted this trip would be a trip of healing past wounds and finding answers when it comes to her family in my meta here: https://jonsa101.tumblr.com/post/649841094458310656/max-goodwin-and-his-declaration-of-love-and this seems to be panning out. I think this trip is really going to put things in perspective for Helen about what she wants and the things that really matter to her. I think about episode 3x4 where Helen proclaims that she keeps “running out of time” in the areas of her life that are really important to her. Her deepest desires have always been to have a family and a child of her own. As she heals, reconnects with her family, and reflects on what matters most to her, I wonder if her desires for a family of her own will be at the forefront of her mind when she reconnects with Max? What’s that state of her mindset after a trip like that? I might be thinking entirely too deep about this but these are the thoughts that run in my mind now as we head into the finale.

For Max, we saw him sort out the custody battle for Luna in 3x13. We also saw Helen basically tell him that their relationship was worth the fight. From yesterday’s sneak peek, we know at the beginning of the finale he is deeply longing for Helen and is clearly pondering a life with her. What shifts his focus away from that is when he thinks he’s misplaced his wedding ring. We all know that this episode will be the final step Max takes to let go of his past and embrace his future with Helen but again what does that look like? Again, all of this plays a role to what I think will be the most important part of the episode. 

Their Cliffhanger!!!

So, what exactly could their cliffhanger or cliffhangers be? At this point, the possibilities are endless! Like I said, I believe the best is yet to come for them and that any cliffhanger coming their way will be a great one! At the very beginning of the season, I said that this is the season of love declarations and commitment and that I wouldn’t be surprised if Max and Helen ended up engaged: https://jonsa101.tumblr.com/post/649841094458310656/max-goodwin-and-his-declaration-of-love-and. Max saying he wanted to build something better for Luna and Helen struck me and these were my thoughts.

“Max is just giving me MAJOR “I love you and I’m trying to commit and build something for us vibes.” I think one of my greatest gifts in life is the ability to read between the fucking lines. As a grown 26 year-old women, if a man that I have feelings for that I know has feelings for me comes to me and says, “I want to build something better for you,” we are either married or a marriage proposal is around the corner. A man is not trying to build something better for/with a friend or a confidant. Ok! You build something with someone you want to spend your life with! These are the types of conversations you have with your husband, wife or life partner! Period! After everything they’ve been through before and especially after a year of being in a pandemic, I think now more than ever Max is going to get or has already gotten clarity about what and who he wants and he’s going to go after it. When you realize how quickly life can change it literally shifts everything and makes you change your priorities and go after what you actually want. To me, this will be reflected in the show.”

Oddly enough, I think my words are pretty similar to Shaun Cassidy’s tweet about this finale:

Max will get clarity.

Max will see the light.

Mind you, I wrote this meta after seeing the first episode of the season. Now as we head into the season finale, after all of Max’s personal suffering, after everything Max and Helen have been through together, after Max’s second death or life experience, I think Max seeing the light or gaining clarity is a hell of a lot more than them just becoming a couple! It’s established that Max wants her! It’s established that Max wants to be with her and they’re going to be couple! Shaun is already out here retweeting “couple era” tweets. I think seeing the light holds weight and I think an engagement fits the bill. I think Max and Helen are at a point in their lives and in their relationship where they want a life together! They are completely all in I just think they’re trying to navigate what the hell that looks like. Also, like I said earlier, where we leave off in the season 3 finale will be the setup for the main storylines in season 4. I think many people in the fandom believe that at some point in season 4 Max and Helen will try for a baby and we will see her infertility struggles play out. I have my own personal opinions on this topic but I’ll save that for another meta. If there is an expectation that in season 4 we will see Max and Helen as a happy couple, Helen stepping up as Luna’s mom/co-parent and them potentially wanting to expand their family, don’t you think it makes sense for Helen to at least be his fiancee?! Honestly y’all! Think about it! Do you think Max would start the process of trying to get pregnant with Helen without marrying her first? I don’t think so. I definitely think he’s a put a ring on it type of guy! Another point that I want to make is this. Luna is in the picture. Luna and Max are a package deal. Helen knows this and when they have this conversation about how they’re going to navigate their lives together, I know that without hesitation we are about to see Helen loving Luna unconditionally and basically being her mom in season 4. Loving your partner’s child unconditionally as your own is the highest form of love and commitment you can show and do for your partner. I know without a shadow of doubt that Helen is going to do this. So as Helen shows him her love and commitment, how can Max tangibly SHOW her how much he loves her and is committed to their lives and their future together? These are just things I’ll leave y’all to think about. 

To wrap this up here are some other quick thoughts I have about the finale.

At this point I strongly believe that Max and Helen are in New York City based on the promos and spoilers I’ve seen. One thing I will say though is at the same time don’t discount the possibility of Max and Helen at some point in the episode also being in London as well. Remember all the promos, spoilers and sneak peeks we’ve seen so far are things they want us to see!!!! We only have pieces of the full story and because of that ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE! I remember back in season one when spoilers came out for the season finale. Going into the finale, most of us who were in the fandom back then already knew there would be some sort of accident/ ambulance crash. At best we thought that it would only affect Max, Georgia and Luna. We had no idea that the season finale would also put Bloom and Helen’s life at stake as well!! The point I’m trying to make is this, even though we saw the spoilers we didn’t have the full picture of what exactly was filmed in those spoilers.

I think when Max and Helen finally have their moment it will be glorious and romantic af! I’m expecting to see kissing, lovemaking, and everything in between but the most important thing are the conversations!! I’m expecting to see a lot of deep conversations about how they’re going to make this thing work after they say there I love you’s. 

Long before the episode synopsis came out, I told y’all that Max and Reynolds moment in the season finale would be pivotal for Sharpwin in this same meta https://jonsa101.tumblr.com/post/649841094458310656/max-goodwin-and-his-declaration-of-love-and and that’s what we are going to see play out on screen. It’s natural for Max to have an emotional attachment to that ring. He was married to Georgia and had a life with her. That doesn’t negate how he feels about Helen. Even more so than that do you know what I also think is at play here? Guilt. The guilt of him trying to move on with the woman he’s had feeling for since season 1. I mean, I personally don’t think they’re using voiceovers of Max and Helen’s conversations in season 1 in their promo for no reason. I don’t see why they wouldn’t address it especially when for us as an audience we know that’s the case. I also think it’s not a coincidence that Reynold’s finds himself in a situation that’s pretty similar to where Max was at. So in my mind, I think it needs to be addressed in order to move on. As he starting a new relationship, he should be honest about having feelings for Helen while he was married and get that off his plate. I think he’s been carrying the weight of that guilt since season two and it’s time to let it go.

Last but not least there is the Mina and Max scene from the spoilers. I don’t know what to make of this but if Mina is in London and the finale is a full time jump episode with no flashbacks, I don’t see how Mina and Max could have a convo in NYC. If they’re having a conversation, I think it’s going to be in London. That’s just how I see it! I could be dead ass wrong but again this is just my opinion. It could be possible that we might see more than one day take place in this episode. I mean realistically, I don’t see how Helen can listen to his voicemail, send Mina off to school, reconnect with her mama and then fly to NYC and meet up with Max all in the same day. That’s super unrealistic to me! Spoilers don’t give us the full scope of what’s going on. Also, I think it’s a little bit weird for Max and Mina to be having a conversation at night with no prior relationship with each other. So, my guess is whatever conversation they’re having would be after Max and Helen have established themselves as an official couple. Just my two cents. 

As always feel free to reach out with me with any questions you might have and also let me know what cliffhanger you think is in store for them!

[jonsa101]

Do you think when Max double back and said “we never talked about it” do you think Helen took it as yes finally he’s opening up and that’s why she hug him and laugh that relieved laugh? And then she asked him that question and she realize he still doesn’t get it??

Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!! This is a great question and such a hard one to answer as well! I’ve honestly considered a lot of scenarios in my mind about where Helen’s mind was at before and after the hug. I have gone back and forth about it but after analyzing it for awhile these are my final thoughts on it.

In my last ask I got from @abriaashley, I had mentioned that there was a very brief moment in that rooftop scene that reminded of me their rooftop scene in 1.17. Before I answered this ask, I took a couple days to really make sure that I knew what I was talking about but after analyzing it I know without a shadow of doubt this is the exact same expression. To me, this brief moment below is the most important key in understanding everything that happened during and after their hug.

But in order to understand why Helen has this expression on her face, we need to first examine the scene where we saw this expression first. In episode 1.17, Max and Helen are having a conversation within a conversation about their relationship. Everything is subtext but essentially Helen tells Max that she needs to “triage,” she can’t be his “all of the above” and that she’s removing herself as his doctor. Of course Max is upset by this and with his wonderful Freudian slip he reveals his true heart’s desire when he says...

But what if I want you?

After this declaration, we get this expression on her face and then Helen STICKS TO HER RESOLVE!

In the context of this scene, Helen’s expression here tells me two things:

Max telling her “what if I want want you” is exactly what she wants to hear. She clearly has feelings for him and hearing that is supposed to tempt and sway her resolve. But based on their current circumstances the idea of them is simply not possible and it’s heart aching.

She clearly doesn’t want to do what she’s about to do in this moment but she’s BUILDING UP THE WILL POWER to do what she feels she has to do!

This is my interpretation of why Helen has that expression on her face. When I look at episode 3.10 where Helen has that same look before she hugs Max, I think the same reasons apply for this moment as well. As an avid Sharpwin shipper it’s easy to fan girl about these intimate moments and get carried away but when you logically look at their scene and the scene that took place right before, hopefully what I explain will make perfect sense to you.

Before Max and Helen’s moment on the roof, Helen had a GUT-WRENCHING scene with her niece. Mina is still heavily grieving her father and this explains so much of why she’s also had a lot of behavioral issues. She’s suffering emotionally and is desperately trying to find some semblance of peace and healing. Shanthi Sekaran, the writer for this episode, said the inspiration for this scene was Micaheanglo’s Pieta and how fitting it was for this moment between them.

“Pieta” which translates to pity or compassion, shows the the Virgin Mary compassionately holding on to the dead body of Jesus as she sorrowfully contemplates the death of her beloved son.

Like this sculpture, Helen compassionately holds Mina and comforts her as Mina is overcome with her grief and as Helen is trying to empathize with the depths of Mina’s sorrow! It’s just such a beautiful thing to witness and why I’m hoping Mina sticks around for the long haul. There’s so much emotional investment already and in this moment of their lives, they desperately NEED EACH OTHER! So when you look at everything from a wholistic perspective and you look at the chain of events that led Helen to be on that rooftop in the first place, does it LOGICALLY make sense that Helen would be in the headspace to address her relationship with Max or even kiss him? Nooooooooo!!!!

It doesn’t make sense!

If anything, her actions in this scene is a reflection of what she did earlier with Cassian when she broke up with him. As she made her niece first priority with Cassian, she is essentially making her niece first priority again with Max, despite being in love with him!

Let’s breakdown 3.10’s rooftop scene so y’all can know where I’m coming from.

Part 1 of this scene is Max and Helen discussing parenting and him emotionally supporting her when she feels like she had a parenting fail. This should have been the first clue for us to understand how this moment between them would play out because this issue with Mina was the main thing that was clearly plaguing her mind!

In part 2 of this scene, Max turns to leave and then after briefly hesitating, he turns around says

“I’m sorry about Cassian.”

As soon as he says this we see this same expression we saw in 1.17. Then Max continues and says.

I don’t know what to...say. I mean, we never talk about it.”

Y’all I said this in my last ask but this is a really big deal! This is Max’s first attempt to bring up the elephant in the room between them and it’s something that he’s never attempted to address before. Helen knows this is a big deal too and she knows where this conversation was headed. Hence why before the conversation could even go anywhere, Helen cut him off with a hug!

Like I said at the beginning of this post, the expression Helen makes before the hug is the key to understanding this scene in it’s entirety! Similar to 1.17 I believe the same reasons apply for her expression in 3.10 but vary slightly.

Once again, what Max is saying is exactly what Helen wants to hear but also what she’s been waiting for him to do! Unlike in season 1, Max and Helen are in completely different circumstances than they were back then. Subconsciously, they had feelings back then but now they are both fully aware that they’re in love with each other. The massive elephant in the room exists between them because they don’t talk about their feelings and they’re to afraid to voice that they’re in love with each other. There is no doubt in my mind that Max finally being able to at least broach the topic is something that she has always wanted Max to do. They seemingly don’t have anything that’s holding them back from being together but based by how I see it, the heart aching look on Helen’s face tells me that in Helen’s mind it’s essential she puts her sole focus into Mina, even if this is something she’s always wanted. (This Is KEY!)

Like 1.17, I think Helen was building up that will power to tell him that she’s happy that their friends even though she’s in love with him. That hug between them was a lot of things. It was deeply loving and heartfelt. It was cathartic with pent-up angst and longing semi-released but most of all, it was desperate and supportive. Despite this, I also believe that this hug was used to avoid a conversation that Helen didn’t want to have. If she allowed that conversation to go any further she would have 100% been swayed and would have probably given into her feelings. But Helen didn’t want to be swayed. She wanted to stick to her resolve that Mina is her first priority! Is this a problematic mindset? Yes! But after that emotionally charged moment with Mina I can see how Helen might think she’s making the right decision.

Also, I’m convinced that if Mina’s breakdown didn’t happen before Max and Helen’s moment on the rooftop, they would have probably had that conversation. But since it did happen, it totally plays a role in what transpires between Helen and Max.

For the moments after they hug this is how I interpret those interactions:

When Helen says to Max “what you said earlier” initially I thought she was referring to something he said earlier in the day. Now that I’ve taken a couple of days to really think about it, I just don’t think that makes sense. Again, after Helen’s moment with Mina, I don’t think she was in the headspace at all to talk about her feelings for him. This scene was more so about Max stepping up and being emotionally supportive of her and I think what’s she’s actually referring to is Max saying “But it helps not to be alone.” In that moment Helen recognized that Max will unequivocally support her and I think that’s something she’s incredibly grateful for. When Max responds with “what did I say?,” I genuinely believe he’s not thinking straight because he so overwhelmed and overjoyed to have Helen in his arms. Also, I think naturally he asks that question because he wants to know for future reference what he needs to keep saying to keep her in his arms 🥰.That look that she gives Max before she tells him that she’s really glad that they’re friends isn’t necessarily a look of disappointment because of Max. After I watched it again, that look to me is more so of a look of “I hate that I’m doing this but I have to do this.” As she is gazing into his eyes, it’s her final push to stick to her resolve! Her mind was already made up and she was going to see that decision through.

Y’all I’m going to wrap this up here because this ask wasn’t supposed to be a meta but ended up that way! Lol! Though these are my opinions on what transpired in 3.10 that doesn’t change my opinion of how I see things unfolding for Sharpwin this season. I just think it’s important to put scenes in proper context. Though Helen might have said that they’re friends, it is so evident that she is clearly in love with him. Like Max, she can’t pretend or neglect her personal wants and needs forever! The great sleeping bear of her desire stirred and is wide awake! Sooner rather than later that bear needs to be fed!

Feel free to reach out to me through my Dms on Tumblr or on Twitter! @oyindaodewale. Also my ask box is always open! 🥰

None of the Gifs in this post are mine!

[jonsa101]

New Amsterdam Season 3x7: The Groundwork to Heal and Rebuild

Last night’s episode truly blew me away. It’s definitely one of the best episodes in the series. To be honest, I was incredibly anxious about how the show would handle systemic racism in the healthcare system but I think the writers did a beautiful job. I love how they have redirected Max’s story. It truly is a great character shift. Max has gone from the “how can I help” guy who tries to solve everything and usually always succeeds at it, to the guy who fails miserably and in frustration even throws in the towel. It’s so refreshing because the Max we had before this shift was unrealistic. This season is so good because this season feels real and authentic and Max though idealistic, is finally getting a big dose of reality in how he operates. I don’t think the show is ever going to give us season 1 or 2 Max again and that’s a good thing! That means our male lead is finally growing and evolving. It’s character development baby and we love to see it!  I also love where the storyline is going for Helen. I have always had a head canon that Helen has some wild baby sister that would pop into her life to live with her and Helen would look out for her and take her under her wing. The story line with Meena is way better than my head canon and kinda falls in line with what I’ve always imagined. I’m so happy that Helen has a niece and that she’s moving in with her! This is literally the PERFECT ROLE for Helen. There’s nothing better than having a character who struggles with being vulnerable than literally having an unexpected character show up to shake things up and unroot the vulnerabilities/traumas said character has yet to deal with.  

A lot of people couldn’t understand why Helen gave up her relationship with Cassian because of her niece but I completely understand where she’s coming from. Helen is completely out of her depth here. She wanted a baby and had know plans to take in her brother’s child let alone a teenager. This is completely new territory for her and the stress of having to juggle this new role, a new relationship and her already hectic job at New Amsterdam was probably overwhelming. Like most people who have a type A personality, she is doing what she feels like she has to do to get ready. Meena moving in with Helen is purposeful on so many levels and there are three things I’m expecting to see on screen because of it.

First, we are going to see so much more of Helen on a personal level. I fully expect to see Helen’s home life way more frequently as we see her step into this aunt/mother role and raise a teenager. This is not going to be a walk in the park. Helen is going to STRUGGLE. Meena will more than likely push Helen’s buttons to know end and and bring out all the vulnerabilities that she tries so hard to keep down. It will be probably be a bit ugly at first but as Helen and Meena start to bond and find common ground, Helen will FLOURISH. We will see her at her best as she thrives in this aunt/mother role. Second, Meena is absolutely going to peep the feelings that Max and Helen have for each other and she’s going to let her opinions be known. For the most part, teenagers know how to read the room and I’m pretty sure Meena will be know different. As Helen and Meena grow closer and as she possibly interacts with Max as well, I’m pretty confident Meena will say something and play a small part in pushing Max and Helen together. Of course this is just a prediction but usually a third character calls out the obvious “Unresolved Sexual Tension” between love interests and my money is on Meena! Third, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Helen stepped down from deputy medical director to step into this aunt/mother role as Max tries to be a single father to Luna while also trying to fill a mother void in Luna’s life. When we were heading into the season finale and going into season 2, I wrote a meta detailing my thoughts about how I felt about Helen deciding to be Max’s doctor again. I didn’t necessarily agree with the decision because I believed that Helen needed to remain true to the emotional and professional boundaries she was trying to set for herself. I also believed that because it was indicated Max and Helen had feelings for each other, her role needed to shift going forward in their relationship. It took two seasons but Helen’s role has finally shifted! 🙌🏾 She is no longer Max’s doctor or deputy medical director and for once Max no longer has the crutch/excuse of trying to navigate how he feels about her through that lense!!! THIS IS HUGE!!!

Max now has to truly sit there with his feelings and feel the absence of not going to Helen for everything because of the necessity of the roles she once had in his life. He will quickly come to terms with the fact that not only is he in love with her but he’s truly wants and needs her as his LIFE PARTNER! On top of that, Ryan has literally been teasing that Max is looking for not only a partner but a mother/mother role for Luna and he’s trying to figure that out fast (I will literally link the article). Max already knows Helen’s desire to be a mom but he will literally get the chance to see Helen step into that role with Meena! This isn’t by accident and it’s all purposeful. I’ve said this a hundred times and I’ll say it again, the showrunners are setting the groundwork for them to get together this season. Something has shifted. There’s a deep longing and desperation behind Max and I genuinely believe that he is consumed with his feelings for her. Through a bathroom door he was trying to convince Helen to be co-medical director to help battle systemic racism but while he’s trying to convince her, through subtext, he is essentially asking her to be his partner in life! I saw someone mention on Twitter that it was basically a proposal in a joking manner but honestly, that’s exactly what it was. It was a subtext laced proposal! His feelings are so all consuming that he can’t truly stay on the topic at hand!!! I think Max is on the verge of the floodgates bursting wide open and he is going to lay everything out on the table. Also, seeing Max’s behavior last night oddly reminds me a bit of Mr. Darcy in the Pride and Prejudice. Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Darcy and Max don’t have the same mannerisms but the depth of the feelings they have for their love interests and how it manifests feels the same. I’ll get into this more at the conclusion of this meta.

Anyway, when I look at the season in it’s entirety so far, I see the show setting up two people that both have to develop and heal in specific areas so that they can eventually come together by the end of the season. Helen is struggling with vulnerability, feeling like she’s running out of a time with the desires she truly wants in life and now in the most unexpected way is being thrust into aunt/motherhood. Max’s idealism has been completely rocked by the pandemic and now more than ever he’s forced to be more self aware of his actions and needs to evolve from the chronic hero syndrome. He’s also essentially stepping into fatherhood again as he tries to learn and navigate being a single dad and making Luna his first priority. I think for a time Max and Helen will need to face their issues head on by themselves but as they go through their own healing journeys, they’re going to need each other. Also, they’re DEEPLY IN LOVE so even though it seems like they’re drifting a part it’s only going to be temporarily. Eventually, they’ll start “burdening” each other again.

Another important point that I want to bring up is this. In the last meta that I wrote, I mentioned how I believed that Max needs to go above and beyond to try meet Helen’s needs and support her and I genuinely believe that we will see that throughout this season. In last night’s episode, after he poured his heart out and told her that he’s grateful that she’s there with him, Helen resigned as deputy medical director. The old Max would have put up a fight and put his needs before hers because he wants her there with him but despite it being painful, he accepted her resignation. That’s growth! Taking Helen out of the equation as his number two at the hospital is going to make him so much more aware of her needs in her personal life rather than the needs of the hospital. They’re relationship has always been so intertwined with their work at New Amsterdam that Max hasn’t learned to truly prioritize Helen outside of that but this season he’s definitely going to. The absence of Helen in his literal everyday work life with the combination of his overwhelming feelings will eventually lead to a wild pursuit. A pursuit to know her heart, her wants, her needs and most importantly a pursuit to be with her.

My last point is this! I’ve made some pretty bold predictions this season about where I see Max and Helen going. Again, I think something MASSIVE is on the horizon and I honestly still think that by the end of this season Max and Helen might very well be engaged!! I don’t know Fam they’re just giving me this vibe especially Max! Last night solidified to me that he is getting to a place where his feelings are beginning to overwhelm him. This brings me back to Mr. Darcy. I believe Mr. Darcy and Max are at the same emotional level when it comes to how they feel about their significant others. When it was to much to bare for Mr. Darcy not only did he declare his love for Elizabeth but he proposed. He literally went from 0-100. Though Elizabeth rejected his first proposal, he proposed again and the second time around they had both done the work that they needed to in order to understand each other better and realize that they loved each other. I can’t help but think of Darcy saying

“You have bewitched me body and soul and I love I love I love you. And wish from this day forth never to be parted from you.”

Is it just me or is Max acting a little bit like Helen has bewitched him body and soul? He’s all over the place when it comes to her lately and his body language has changed too! Did anyone else peep how closely Max and Helen were sitting next to each other? It was so intimate for a second I thought they were going to kiss or he was going to grab her hands. I don’t know it just screamed desire to me. Also, this ongoing theme were he tells her that he “can’t do this without her” or he’s grateful that “she’s here with him” to me is in the same light of Darcy telling Elizabeth that he never wants to be parted from her. From season two onwards Max has openly expressed wanting/needing Helen by his side. Now that we are in season 3, it seems like Max need for this has only gotten deeper. I make this comparison to say that the underlying vibe of how we are seeing Max and Helen unfold this season to me points to something incredibly tangible happening between them at season end.

The thing about Max and Helen is that yes, they are a slow burn but at the same time they’re also a 0-100 type of couple. I want to write another meta to explain this in detail but what I’ll say here is that if circumstances were different in season 1 and Max wasn’t married, Max and Helen would have probably been the type of couple who got married within a couple of months of knowing each other. Also, from my perspective, once Max and Helen finally let each other know how they really feel, it’s not going to be a thing where they’re just dating like with Cassian or Panthaki. It’s going to be like it’s a wrap, I’m all in, you are my person, this is it for me type thing. It’s going to be commitment! I feel like people forget but this show started in 2018. In September it will be four years since the show premiered. Granted COVID happened in 2020, but essentially Max and Helen have been doing this tango for awhile now. The expectation should be that we are finally going to see things come into fruition in a major way this season because that’s 1000% what I believe. Everything in my gut is telling me that the time is now and they are setting them up to do groundwork to heal so that they can rebuild together. A new chapter for them is on the horizon and I’m so excited about it!

[jonsa101]

Sharpwin and Richonne are Wildly Similar!

Ok y’all so when I was heavily involved in the GOT fandom I used to write metas like this all time. Drawing similarities from tv and film can often pinpoint where a story is heading because as you all know, in Hollywood the same stories have been used countless times over. Anyway, this is just one of the many metas in my drafts so I hope you enjoy it!

The Walking Dead is a cultural phenomenon and Richonne has to be one of the most beloved ships of all time! I stated binge watching the series last year and the hype is real for these two! They’re an incredibly compelling couple and as you watch the show you can’t help but to root for them and their family.

Recently as I’ve thought about Richonne I can’t help thinking about Sharpwin. To me, Sharpwin is the doctor version of Richonne where instead of dealing with apocalyptic zombies, they recently went through a deadly pandemic instead. In more ways than one Richonne and Sharpwin’s story is wildly similar and in this meta I’m going to breakdown down their similarities. *This will include spoilers if your interested in watching either show!!!!

Marriage On the Rocks

At some point, both of these men had rocky marriages with their wives. It’s an obstacle they both try to overcome but the journey to try and “fix” things isn’t the easiest!

Widowed Single Fathers

Both of their wives have traumatic birthing experiences and die in the process. Overnight, they both become single fathers. Also their wives both give birth to girls.

Hallucinating Wives

In their grief, both men start hallucinating their dead wives in order to cope. It becomes so bad that they both start to believe that their hallucinations are real.

Tension-Filled Meet Cute

When both of these couples first meet their future significant others they definitely bumped heads. It was tension-filled and laced with subtle attraction but they bumped heads nonetheless!

Motherhood Journey

Both Michonne and Helen Sharpe have huge motherhood stories. Michonne suffers with the grief of her child and letting her guard down to connect with Rick’s kids. Helen suffers with infertility and her deep desire to have a child on her own.

Teamwork Makes the Dreamwork

Both of these couples are the ultimate team. Max and Helen run the biggest public hospital I. America together while Rick and Michonne kill off walkers and keep their crew alive. In these moment we see how well these couples work together and we also seem them fall in love.

The Dupe Before The Real Thing

You know the phenomenon of women buying dupes/lookalikes of bags bags before they invest in the real thing? Essentially that’s what happened with Rick and Max. Their relationships Jessie and Alice was never made for the for the long term. It was briefly to test the waters before they go after who they really wanted the entire time!

Now to me, this is where the similarities end. Rick and Michonne are way further ahead in their story than Max and Helen but I believe Richonne’s story lays the groundwork for where Max and Helen are headed.

Like Richonne, Sharpwin will get together and when they do they’re going to be all in. They’re going to go from 0-100 like Richonne where they’re either going to move in together or get engaged.

Like Michonne with Judith, Helen will eventually become Luna’s mother. Not only in action but somewhere down the line I’m sure that Helen will legally adopt Luna.

Last but not least, like Richonne, Max and Helen will become a family of four. It will be Max, Helen, Mina (if she becomes a permanent character) and Luna very similar to Rick, Michonne,Carl and Judith.

Anyway, I hope y’all enjoyed this quick meta. I love both ships and the similarities are uncanny!

As always you can DM me here or on Twitter @oyindaodewale.

[jonsa101]

Yes, There’s Only 14 Episodes in Season 3 But Sharpwin is On Track and Progressing How They’re Supposed To.

There has been so much talk about this season’s writing and the lack of Sharpwin scenes that I thought I would just address everything in this post.

First, the writing this season is NOT BAD! In my honest opinion I actually think this season has some of the best writing in the series. Compared to season two, the writing is head and shoulders above what we got last year. More than ever before we are diving into these characters stories, seeing friendships form, getting a better look into their home life and seeing secondary characters shine! This is a good thing! These were the things that were so desperately needed in season 2 but we didn’t see this play out. I’ve said this before in my infamous season 2 rant and I’ll say it again, a show can’t solely depend on a ship! It has to have great storytelling and good character development for all of it’s main characters. This is what New Amsterdam failed to do in season two and they’re now making it up for it in season 3. The only area I would say the storyline suffered was the Cassian, Helen and Max “love triangle.” There was definitely more intent with that plot before the pandemic. Cassian was not only supposed to be a catalyst for Jealous Max and Sharpwin but he was also supposed to come in and challenge the way Max did things. Cassian’s whole thing was self care first=great patient care which was the complete opposite of Max and the two of them were supposed to clash. Obviously this completely changed due to the pandemic. You can’t have a storyline about a doctor prioritizing himself first for “better patient care”in the midst of thousands of doctors globally throwing themselves on the frontlines and even loosing their lives to COVID-19. It would have been a terrible look to have that storyline so they clearly scrapped it! What we saw was probably them trying to salvage whatever was left from the original plot while they still had Daniel Dae Kim in the limited amount of episodes for season 3.

Apart from that, I think the writers are doing a fantastic job in terms of character development this season. Arguably I would say that Iggy probably has the best storyline so far and that’s incredible for his character. Tyler Labine is acting his ass off and Iggy’s scenes with Lauren, Vijay and Martin were top tier!!! We are finally getting a Max and Reynolds bromance that was teased in season one but literally know where to be found in season two! It’s great seeing them bond on screen and I hope we get more moments with these two. We’re also seeing Reynold’s “life plan” blow up in his face and we finally have some closure with Bloom. They kept us in limbo for so long! We didn’t know if him and Bloom were truly over but now we finally know. Also, it seems like he and Evie are officially done as well and he might have a new love interest on the horizon. For Lauren, she’s clearly seems to be having a coming out story which is something I didn’t see coming at all. I’m really curious how they’re going to play this out for her and can’t wait to see it unfold. Last but not least, for Max and Helen they are both going through massive character development phases which leads me to my second point.

I love a good Max and Helen scene as much as the next person. To me they’re the ultimate ship and I want to see them thrive and flourish but just because we don’t see Max and Helen interact doesn’t mean that the show isn’t properly developing or investing in their relationship!!!!!!!!The relationship between Max and Helen is so nuanced that their relationship doesn’t hang in the balance because they don’t have more witty, flirtatious, or emotional dialogue. Don’t get me wrong, I adore those moments. Those scenes between them make us the passionate sharwpin shippers we are. At the same time though, we have to truly take a look at why the state of their relationship is where its at now and why from a narrative perspective their current interactions make sense. In order to do this, we have to take a look at where Max and Helen left off last year.

At the end of season 2, Max made a move on Helen and almost kissed her in her office. After this moment occurred he never addressed it and at the time he was still dating Alice. There’s no doubt in my mind that this was the catalyst for why Helen started dating Cassian in the first place. She had practically laid her feelings out there and told Max he was the reason she gave up half of her department. After this revelation and the massive, intimate moment he initiated in her office, he didn’t even have the decency to address it. He swept it under the rug and wanted to keep the same relationship that he had with her like nothing ever happened. Even though Helen was aware about Alice, we now know from season 3 that Helen felt a type away that Max never “officially” told Helen that he was dating her. This is IMPORTANT!!! Max and Helen did not end on a high note in season 2. In fact, the very last scenes we see of season 2 is Helen blowing off Max to go on a date with Cassian and Max breaking off things with Alice. I know this wasn’t intentional due to the season being cut short but it definitely contributes to where they are now. 

Fast forward a year later, and not only do we still have a massive almost kissed elephant in the room between Max and Helen but also the trauma of being on the frontlines of a pandemic and going through the biggest social justice movement the world has seen. This is something I’ve said many times over but I’m not sure the fandom recognizes how much these events have permanently altered these characters and changed the dynamics of this show. COVID-19 changed everything. The Black Live Matter Movement for the first time grabbed the attention of the world and changed everything too! Max and Helen are in the process of trying to heal and rebuild their lives the best they can as individuals after such a tumultuous year. At the same time, they are acutely aware of the feelings they have for each other and the UST between them and are carrying the weight of that as well. Naturally guys, the combination of all this is going to change most dynamics in a relationship. Things are awkward and distant  because Max and Helen are awkward and distant!! They have a lot of shit that they’re going through as individuals and subconsciously as a “couple.” They are clearly not in a healthy place to be as vulnerable as they once were to each other. And how can they be when their feelings have literally been eating at them for over year?! It’s hard to ignore that and try to force yourself to go back to the way things were. Especially when their feelings have “technically”  been out in the open since the end of season 2. They both know what it is! They were steps away from unleashing years of built up sexual tension between them and they went on with their lives like it never even happened. Max walking in on her and Cassian kissing in HER OFFICE and subsequently having that convo with Helen was not for shits and giggles. It triggered the BEAST of his feelings that he had fought so hard to suppress. There is no doubt in my mind that when he saw them in her office kissing, he was having some serious dejavu to their almost kissing affair last year. He‘s in love with her and she’s in love with him but this what happens when you continuously try and run away from those feelings and let it fester instead of trying to deal with it head on. The dynamic  were seeing between them now is a result of their unresolved issues and it absolutely plays into Sharpwin’s story. It doesn’t take away from it. It makes sense for where they are NOW! 

If we look at season three holistically, you’ll realize that a momentum for something significant happening for Sharpwin has been set through the acting and writing. I got to give it to Ryan Eggold. He has that fire and desire, Mr. Darcy type level acting down to a tee so far. It is so satisfying seeing Max so overcome with his feelings that you can tangibly see it in his body language and hear it in his voice. We have seen Max taken aback by Helen before but we have NEVER seen him like this. I keep on saying it but this is different guys. Something has shifted and it seems like Max is on the verge of exploding. His feeling are burning hot right underneath the surface and it’s a beautiful thing to behold. Last night’s episode was ripe with this type of content and Ryan was in his acting bag! It wasn’t an overtly “Sharpwin” episode but the writing and the acting is so clever and methodical, it will have you thinking otherwise. At the beginning of season 3 Max told Helen that he wants to build something better for Luna and something better for her. Was last night not a beautiful reflection of that? One question asking Max if he has ever loved a black woman put him in the shoes of his patient’s husband and had Max advocating for his wife like he would advocate for Helen if it was her! If that’s not fucking romantic I don’t know what it is and if the alarm bells aren’t going off that there is something deeper at play here with a huge payoff around the corner I don’t know what to tell you! Another moment that sticks out to me like a sore thumb is when Helen was telling Cassian that her brother died. I wrote about this in a previous meta of mind but Helen at her most vulnerable telling Cassian that she feels like she’s running out of time is SO SIGNIFICANT guys!!! It’s not only tell us that she fears that she’s missing out on the windows of opportunities for the wants and needs in her life but it literally sets the pacing of how quickly Sharpwin is going to progress. It is the beautiful freudian slip that tells us exactly where things are headed for these two. To me this is equivalent to Max telling Helen “I love my doctor” and “what if I want you?” in season 1. This episode had no interaction between Max and Helen but it was a MASSIVE Sharpwin indicator through and through! These are just a couple of examples but even their respective journeys in parenting is so Sharpwin driven. So in all I’m not mad in the direction the show has taken to showcase their relationship this season because Sharpwin is deeply interwoven in the storyline this year even if it’s not overtly obvious through emotional dialogue/ interactions. 

Also, one thing you have to realize is this, season three is wrapping up a lot of loose ends from season 2 and when it comes to Max and Helen these two points will be/ have to be addressed in the next six episodes.

The Almost Kiss

Whether or Not They Want To Be Together

The showrunners know without a shadow of doubt that the resolution for these two points is owed! If Sharpwin is talking about their almost kiss, there is no way that they aren’t talking about what they mean to each other and what their future looks like together. Both solutions literally go hand in hand and I promise you they are not delaying the resolution for that till season 4. It’s not happening fam. We will see this play out within the next six episodes. So in hindsight, more Sharpwin interaction are on the horizon. 

When I was making predictions about this season I wasn’t aware that this season would only be 14 episodes. I’m sad that season 3 is so short but that still doesn’t change my mind for where I think the story is going. Call me crazy but I’m sticking to my guns. There is something about how Ryan is portraying Max that is signaling something huge. Also I just trust the context clues that i believe the show is giving. I trust it! Anyway y’all! If you have any sharpwin question just DM here or message me on Twitter! my username is @oyindaodewale. 

Love you guys! ❤️

[jonsa101]

Although we wanted a kiss, the scenes we got were precious gems. They're laying the groundwork for Sharpwin just like you said. It's so good!

It really is! I feel like there is so much to unpack in this episode. I was thinking about writing a full-on separate meta but I think I’ll just address everything here.

In my mind, here are the biggest takeaways from last night’s episode.

Max is capable of emotionally supporting Helen despite the feelings he has for her. He’s also getting to a place where he’s comfortable enough to address the “off limit” topics between them! This is a big deal y’all and this trickle is going to eventually lead to the floodgates for him laying everything out on the table! It was a baby step but a step nonetheless!

The great sleeping bear of Helen’s love and desire for Max has finally stirred and woken up. She hasn’t made an appearance in awhile but she’s there! She told Max that she’s glad that “they’re friends” but her face and her body language says that they’re definitely more than that. 😏 Some of y’all have questioned if this is something that she wants right now or is in a mental headspace for but if last night didn’t confirm that not only is she in love with this man but she wants a life with him, I’m not sure what to tell you. Her feelings have always remained the same because feelings like that don’t just disappear! Before the hug, when Max mentioned Cassian, her whole vibe was giving me dejavu to episode 1.17. The same heart aching desire that we saw in that episode is what we saw last night! Even if we got to see it for only moment!

There is something to be said about the language that was used last night during the rooftop scene. The writing is subtle yet so clear and I think it’s pointing to them coming together as a family y’all! Again, Max and Helen are talking about parenting. He says “our kids” and also says “it helps not to be alone.” In season 2, Helen said that she wants to be a mom but she “doesn’t want to do it alone.” There are so many other moments throughout the season where it seems like they’re building up to Helen and Max rebuilding their lives together. In all intensive purposes it seems like...

THIS STORY IS WRITING ITSELF!!!

It’s leading up to where it was always supposed to lead up to and I’m honestly enjoying the ride. Y’all already know how I see the rest of this story playing out but we will see what happens. Either way rest assured that by the end of this season Sharpwin will fully be here!!!

[jonsa101]

OMG SO MUCH GOODNESS!!!

Yes! Yes! Yes! So much goodness! Max being emotionally supportive of Helen, their hug, him caressing Helen’s hair, the longing expression on his face! All of it was so brilliant! I know some people were hoping for a kiss but this is only the beginning! Again, the pressure is building up for Max and he looks like he’s going to pop any minute now. Him bringing up Cassian on that rooftop was such a big deal. That was his first step of him trying to remotely address what’s going on regardless of how awkward it is for him since they don’t even talk about those things. He was genuinely trying to support her and be there for her outside of himself and his feelings and that’s something I’ve continuously said that we needed to see. Did anyone notice how his expression changed when Helen said that she’s glad that they’re friends?!!! Ryan is really doing some of his best work this season because his face went from a small smile to a deep pause/longing look! Ugh! It was just so good! Also, let me not forget about my good sis Freema because boy did we see some longing from Helen tonight! Max is asking her about Cassian when her ass is definitely not thinking about Cassian! Ok! The way she pulled him in for that hug with her eyes clenched for dear life! Also, how her eyes fluttered open once they pulled away from each other! Something woke up the bear of desire deep within her that we haven’t seen all season. It just goes to show that no matter how hard you try you can’t make your feelings for someone just disappear! It doesn’t work that way. That whole scene just left me like...

Also, like clockwork Mina called out the obvious vibe between Helen and Max like I said she would! That was probably my favorite scene of the night to be honest! Max isn’t slick and it was hilarious how he was basically trying to confirm if her and Cassian were over!!! Lol! Also, isn’t it ironic that over the past couple of weeks we’ve been talking about what Max and Helen’s colleagues would think of them if they got together or why none of their colleagues have called out the vibe between them? Then in this episode Max all of sudden says that some people in the hospital might have ideas about them or are talking about their relationship?!! Like y’all!! Who has been talking about them?! Last I checked it was just Iggy in season 1 and that was based on their doctor and patient relationship!! Remember how I said that it could be an intentional story plot to not have any of their staff mention their vibe? Now I’m 1000% running with that idea and think a storyline where one of their colleagues calls them out or implies something is going on between them is around the corner.

Another major highlight of the night for me was Mina and Helen! I don’t care y’all I love Mina and I want her to stick around! Like I said in my meta here: https://jonsa101.tumblr.com/post/647851128427528192/last-nights-episode-truly-blew-me-away-its, I have always imagined Helen having like a wild younger sister or someone similar of that nature to come into her life and shake things up for her. Mina literally fits the role perfectly and I’m loving the adoptive niece/daughter storyline so much. The way I see it is that Helen and Mina NEED EACH OTHER and are so vital to each other’s lives right now. I think the mere presence of being together is uprooting so much trauma and their relationship is slowly healing parts of themselves and they don’t even realize it! I’m honestly so excited to see the growth and healing that’s coming in that relationship!

Last thing I’ll say is this, over the next few episodes at some point something will have to give for Max. The pressure keeps building for him but ultimately something has to trigger him to take the initiative and go after what he wants. I genuinely think that trigger will be Helen herself. I know it seemingly looks like Max will have some issues with his in-laws on the horizon but I think that will be an extended storyline going into season 4. Right now, Max is still struggling to be honest with himself about how he feels and take the initiative to do something about it and I believe this specific storyline is coming to ahead very soon!