#shayxbreslin

[ofwondersandhares]

He's everything I hate.  He's everything that... I'm supposed to be against.   ---- But the only time that I ever feel anything is when...

                          Why can't I stop?  Why do I keep letting him in?

====;;

This with you, it’s wrong. I know it. I’m not a complete idiot.  

@notquiteahitman

[ofwondersandhares]

Continued from

Here.

His words were meant to hurt, they were meant to make her bleed from the inside, he had wanted her to hate him as much as he was trying to convince himself that he hated her. He had wanted to break her heart, to bring her to tears, to make her feel less than what she was.

-- but after all these years, after all they had been through together, he should have known her better than that.

The real question was why? Why all of a sudden was he playing this card now? Shay had a theory, she had a hunch - but didn't he remember that they had danced this dance so many times before?

"It is too late for that, Breslin. You're too late to play that card. I know exactly who you are and I've always known. I have never once asked you to change who you are, nor did I expect you to but I saw you change regardless. You became a better man who became capable of love. It isn't that you don't want a life with me, Breslin, it is that you don't want to admit to yourself that some part of you, desires it. ---"

A heavy sigh left her lips as she turned away from him, but her guard wasn't completely down. She knew better than that. "--- those words you spoke can't change the past. You still saw me when nobody else did. We still have our memories, both the good and the bad, and you still have a part of my heart that nothing can touch. Not even your own words spilling from your very lips like venom."

So what exactly was the point Shay was trying to make? "You can tell yourself that hate me. You can refuse to admit you ever loved me and that's fine. Better the lie you want to believe than the truth you don't."

@notquiteahitman​

[ofwondersandhares]

A lot of feelings went into this video. It’s been a long time coming, a ship video for one of my favourite OTP pairings - a pairing that has literally taken years to develop. Their relationship has always shared a lot of strong similarities to Spike and Buffy’s relationship on Buffy The Vampire Slayer (similarities that weren’t intended, it just happened that way...)

The video is not the best quality because I used only gifs to make this video, but I still feel it turned out really well and I hope one of my favourite writing partners, @notquiteahitman enjoys it as much as I do. ❤️

[ofwondersandhares]

tagging @notquiteahitman

[ofwondersandhares]

Continued From Here.

"--- like you haven't had me under surveillance in this facility before, Breslin. It isn't so dramatic for me to think that maybe you were having them watch me the moment you were alerted I was here." She had known all too well that nobody set foot in this place without Breslin knowing about it. The lot of them had more feared what Breslin would do to them, hadn't they pulled rat and snitched. Still, it had concerned Shay, and inevitably, it had seemed to be concerning to Breslin as well.

And just at that moment, when she felt his hand around her waist, she had almost unconsciously pivoted her body toward his, closer than necessary. His words to her, of course, had made all the sense in the world, a realization washing over her as she seemed to realize just how close she was to him, and just how disapproving their gazes had been. "You don't think Joshua --?"

If they were there because of Joshua, surely they would have been sent from him out of concern for her being there, the only other person that could have sent them might have been her father - but they did not look like they were from Wonderland.

"Your move, or mine?"

@notquiteahitman​

[ofwondersandhares]

[ofwondersandhares]

Continued from here.

@notquiteahitman​

Shay's own expression had changed them, eyebrows furrowing as she had given him a look that had spoken volumes.

”Do you really think I would say that I love you if I didn't?” But then, he had asked her a question that she should have expected from him, but oddly enough, she hadn't. A heavy sigh left Shay's lips. She could easily just say she didn't know, she wasn't usually the one that got all emotional the way, say, her brother did, but, this was the type of question that not only Breslin needed an answer to, but she did as well. She had needed to hear herself say it.

”It is a feeling inside of me. A pull towards you. I have spent years trying to fight it, trying to push it down so far that I forget about it, but it is more than a feeling, it is an energy, a need to be around you, to be a part of your life, to touch you, to feel you, to love you, even when I sometimes hate you. Every fucking day I think about you. Every fucking day I want to know what you are doing, what you are feeling, and if you are thinking about me too. Everything you have done to me, to my family, to my friends, I shouldn't love you. But I do. I do, and somehow, every part of me always comes back to you”

She didn't know if there was anything else she could say to him as she swallowed thickly, turning to head toward the door. ”I just wanted you to know that you have someone. Someone who loves you, with no strings attached. I know I told you once, that I don't want to change you. And I have stuck behind that, for the years we have played this game between us. I have not once begged you to change, I've never given you any ultimatums, I have never allowed myself to believe that you actually care about me, or held myself to a standard that I am somehow different from all the other flings or relationships you have had in your life.”

She knew at that moment, that she should have walked out that door, instead, she had closed the distance between them until she was within his reach. ”And this is where you tell me things are still that way, have always been that way, and will always be that way. This is who we are, and have always been. I am nobody to you, Breslin. I am just another woman in your life, nobody special, nobody important, just some girl you know, who is a bloody fool.”

[ofwondersandhares]

@notquiteahitman