Sherlock x Reader: Sentiment
Author’s Note(s): I struggle publishing Sherlock fics because as a Christian I personally disagree with his statements about God on the show and find it insulting actually. However, I otherwise enjoy the show and enjoy writing fics with his character. Enjoy! I hope you likez!
“Sentiment? Me?” Sherlock scoffed. “A very amusing notion indeed, but I’m afraid the idea is rather ridiculous, and I have places to be.” He turned on his heels and began to walk out of the library.
There was a sigh of annoyance. “Yes, Sherlock, I am talking about sentiment.” That statement caused the consulting detective to halt his smug strut altogether. He lingered at the doorway, hands in his coat pockets, staring straight ahead. Mycroft lifted a brow at his brother’s reaction, unfolding his hands and rising from his desk. “I know what she means to you.”
Sherlock turned his head to shoot a sideways glance over his shoulder. “Who?”
Mycroft rolled his eyes. “Who do you think?” His voice held the slightest edge to it, showing his impatience. “I have already seen the signs. You may have convinced the rest of the world, but you can’t fool me, brother mine.”
“You’re mistaken,” Sherlock replied, though his voice sounded less sure, less convincing.
“I don’t believe I am, but that’s beside the point. The point is you need to stay aware. Having your friend, John Watson, in the way is dangerous as it is...but to fall in love with __________ leaves you vulnerable in an entirely different way.”
-
You turned your face away from the computer screen to shoot Mycroft a look of disbelief from across the desk. “Wait, wait. What is this?” He paused the video as you continued. “You said you’d explain why a few of your goons were following me at the market.”
“They aren’t goons,” Mycroft chided with the raise of his brow. “They are agents. And I’m getting to that part. So please…” He gave a crisp smile. “Keep watching.”
You shut your eyes and exhaled deeply. “But I’m not sure I should even see this.”
It was footage of an apparent conversation between the two brothers that you presumed had happened fairly recently. The idea of getting a glimpse into Sherlock’s true feelings was uncomfortable, yet intriguing, and also downright terrifying. Even though part of you hoped for him to feel something for you, the other side of you accepted that it may not be the case. He was always quite serious about his work, and you were glad to be one of his few friends anyway.
“I assure you,” Mycroft continued. “It is rather important that you see this. It’s a matter of national security.”
“National security,” you deadpanned. “Well, I guess you mean business if you’re playing that card.” You shrugged your shoulders and leaned back in the leather chair. “Alright then.”
Mycroft resumed the video, and you reluctantly turned your eyes back to the screen.
-
“...The point is you need to stay aware. Having your friend, John Watson, in the way is dangerous as it is...but to fall in love with ___________ leaves you vulnerable in an entirely different way.”
“On the contrary, their wisdom and expertise have strengthened my abilities on these cases,” Sherlock countered, regaining his composure.
“Ah, so you don’t deny that you’ve fallen in love?” the Mycroft on the screen asked, and in the present time you felt your heart skip a beat.
Sherlock finally turned around to face him in the video, face blank. “Didn’t think I needed to. You should know better, Mycroft. Sentiment is not my style- especially not love.” It was said without hesitation, and you released a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding.
Mycroft in the video shook his head, exhaling. “All I’m saying is you must stay alert. If your enemies realize what she is to you, it could mean danger for __________ and you.”
“Good afternoon, Mycroft.” Sherlock spoke his farewell without a pause and walked out of the library. The screen went dark, and you shook your head.
-
“So tell me again what the point of that was?” You hoped your expression didn’t betray your pain, but with someone like Mycroft on the other side of the desk, you were basically an open book. “Is this footage your way of showing me he doesn’t care about me and telling me that I need to get out of the way?”
Mycroft’s brows furrowed. “I thought it was rather self-explanatory, but perhaps I need to explain.”
“Explain what?”
His tone grew sharper, and his gaze seemed to demand that you meet it. “That Sherlock Holmes is in love with you.”
Your mouth fell open as you stared back at him. Several moments passed as you processed this information. You at first felt elated, then disbelief, and finally you settled for being skeptical. A chuckle spilled out. “What makes you say that? He just said that love isn’t his style.”
“My brother has the ability to observe. That ability has helped him to reign in his own emotions and allowed him to put on a mask, so to speak. However, I can see past the mask if I know what to look for- which of course I do. It was unmistakable; the slight quirk of his brow, the way he maintained eye contact to try and convince me, and the flash of emotion in his eyes.”
“Are you sure you’re not mistaken?”
“_____________, you’ve seen my ability up close. I see things that many do not, and these are the things I see.” Your gaze fell to rest on the wooden desk in front of you. You weren’t sure how to respond at first. “Sherlock is in love with you,” he continued. “And I gather that you’ve felt similarly toward him for quite some time. I can assume you have his best interest at heart.”
You met his eyes again, nodding. “Of course.”
“Then you realize why you must be protected.”
It was like the pieces of the puzzle finally fit together. You gasped softly in realization. “That’s what this is about? Protecting me so I can’t be used by some villain to get to him?” Your cheeks grew warm. You knew deep down that he cared about you and John more than he let on to the world around him, but you had no idea he felt this way for you.
“Indeed. So, we have reached an understanding, then.”
You hesitated. “Not quite. I don’t know if I like the idea of being followed. Your agents weren’t exactly subtle the first time.” He went silent, and you laughed. “You wanted me to see them. You wanted us to have this conversation. Either way, I still don’t like it.”
“Well,” Mycroft folded his hands on the desk. “I suppose there’s an alternative. Less security would be required if you had some more training.”
“Training,” you echoed. “To fight?”
“Yes, among other things. You’d learn to hone your already-developing observation skills and learn more about criminals and psychological profiles. You are a strong young woman, and I know you can take care of yourself. Still, the concern I have for my brother and his friends would be eased. I have a course prepared for you, much like how we train our agents...should you accept.”
“That sounds pretty interesting,” you said with a nod. “I accept.”
“I’m very glad to hear that, ____________. Training starts at the beginning of next week. I will be handling your training myself, actually.”
“Alright.” You offered your hand across the desk expectantly, and he smiled again as he shook it, though that smile seemed more genuine. “Thanks.”
“I’ll have the car take you home,” he said with a nod.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
You made your way up the stairs, trying to calm your thoughts. The drive back to the flat had your mind buzzing with questions. You wondered what it would be like to hone your skills. Ever since you started working with John and Sherlock, you had looked into self-defense in order to be helpful in a pinch, but the kind of training Mycroft offered would be beyond your usual self-defense class. However, you still weren’t ready to tell your friends about the situation, especially Sherlock. They might not approve at first.
The flat was only lit by a fire in the fireplace when you entered. It already appeared that John had retired for the evening. Sherlock was in his chair with a cup of tea in hand, the fire bathing his features in a warm glow and casting shadows in the room.
“Where were you?” his voice rumbled.
“Out.” Vagueness would be seen as suspicious, but you could not get away with lying to him. You didn’t want to anyway. His blue eyes reflecting orange light turned to you, and you knew he was scanning you for any clues.
“Did you remember to stop on the way home and pick up that package?”
You sighed. “I’m sorry, I got side-tracked. I’ll go back out and…”
“No, no, no,” he said quickly. “Don’t concern yourself. It’s late in the evening.”
“You sure?”
“Go and rest. I’m sure Mycroft nearly bored you to sleep with his rambling.”
You halted. There was no point in asking how he knew you had spoken with his brother. He stared at you with clasped hands touching his chin with interest.
“Yeah... anyway, goodnight,” you muttered, turning to walk away again.
“___________.” He said your name so deeply it kept you frozen in place. The consulting detective rose from his chair and approached until he was in your space. You were surprised at how close was that you instinctively took a step back only for him to step with you. “You spoke with Mycroft, and it was something you intended to keep from me.”
“So?” you breathed.
His gaze never left yours as he continued. “You know very well that he is my arch nemesis. I think I have a right to know what was said.”
“It doesn’t concern you.”
His eyes widened ever so slightly. “Ah, but I think it does, or else you would not be so secretive about it. The question is; what is it? You can tell me, or perhaps I’ll just have to find out on my own.” Sherlock leaned in, and you found yourself unable to think straight for a few seconds before finding your words.
“Not that it’s any of your business,” you said quickly. “But I’ve agreed to let Mycroft train me. And don’t do that.” You took a step back, placing a hand on his shoulder to gently push him away. “You can use attraction to your advantage when you’re on cases, but not with me.”
His brows furrowed. “What?”
“I’m not a fool, Sherlock. I know you know what I feel for you, and I don’t like you getting in my space and using it to get what you want.”
He took a step back and averted his eyes. “That was not my intention, I assure you.”
“Then why were you standing so close?”
“Because I wanted to,” he said simply.
Silence followed his reply. It lasted for nearly a minute. He looked at the fire, and you released a quiet sigh.
“Mycroft is concerned about you.”
Sherlock scoffed.
“He is concerned that John and I both make you vulnerable,” you continued. “But that I make you vulnerable in a different way. He has assigned agents to protect me, but since I wasn’t crazy about that idea, he gave an alternative. I am going to hone my mental and physical abilities to better protect myself and you.”
“Mycroft and I disagree on many things,” Sherlock said. “But this, I think we agree on this.”
“You do?” You had not expected him to. Sherlock Holmes could come across as quite arrogant at times and did not think he needed to be protected by anyone.
“I think honing your skills is a good idea,” he nodded. “To better protect yourself, not me.”
And there it is.
“But Sherlock-”
“However, I’d like to propose an alternative to Mycroft’s alternative.” He extended his hand, his bright eyes darting up to meet yours. You took it, and he pulled you closer so that your other hand rested on his chest while his other arm wrapped around you. “I help you with your training.”
“Why would you want to do that?”
He hesitated, lips parting to release words that did not emerge. His eyes continued to search yours from mere inches away before he found his voice again. “Because I care about you. I want you to be safe... not for my sake, but for yours.”
“A-alright,” you whispered. You glanced at his lips without thinking and forced yourself to focus again on his eyes. Sherlock definitely noticed it.
“Do you want to kiss me?” The question was spoken so matter-of-factly that you almost didn’t process it.
“Do you want to kiss me?” you returned. Despite your position in his arms, admitting you wanted the contact strangely felt too intimate. Deep down you were afraid he’d pull away and go back to be the cold, distant Sherlock he was when you met him.
“I believe I asked first.” He chuckled, and you found yourself laughing. “But I will say that, yes, I do want to.”
“Then what are you waiting for?”
“I-”
“Oh, hey _________, hey Sher-” John’s voice greeted casually as he walked past only to be cut off as he took a few steps back in surprise. “Oh, am I interrupting?”
You pulled away from Sherlock in embarrassment. “No, we were just…”
“It was an experiment,” he said quickly.
“Right, an experiment.” You laughed nervously. “Anyway, the experiment was a success. Goodnight to both of you gentlemen.” You stole one last bashful look at the curly-haired detective before heading for the stairwell. On your way up, you heard John’s voice talking to Sherlock in a hushed tone.
“Were the two of you just….about to kiss?”
“What’s it to you?”
“It’s just,” John chuckled. “I didn’t think you were into...that sort of...thing. Romance, I mean.”
“Goodnight, John.”
“But-”
“Goodnight.”
That night you laid in bed wide awake. Your heart kept fluttering as if you were in Sherlock’s arms again. As if his eyes were still gazing into yours. As if his voice was still speaking to you so deeply. What would tomorrow bring? What was next?
You weren’t sure. One thing you did know for certain was that training would be interesting.
