#shini rambles

[shiniganja]

Wanting more art of my baby but not wanting to see him with other people is a real issue

[shiniganja]

decided I really don't care about the people that hate me and their opinions so I will exclusively be using this blog to document my life with Derek

If other words, if you don't like me, block and move on. ✌🏻 I quite frankly do not give a fuck

[shiniganja]

Though I have stepped back from the fandom and prefer to just exist in my own space due to my personal and unique relationship with Derek and him being a major comfort for me the fact that I have been loving him for almost four years, helping him work through his trauma, and being someone gentle, caring, and kind that accepts every part of him including his insecurities makes my soul happy

[shiniganja]

Idrc if my commissions are "non canon" or mischaracterize Derek. The typical "canon" trope is actually annoying and boring to me. He is a fictional character and I will continue to yumeship and have him portrayed however makes me happy - just as you can. If it bothers you that much the block button is free. 🌸🍓🪻

[shiniganja]

putting this here to brainstorm/so I don't lose my thoughts, I still need to replay the game to see how this would work lore-wise but another AU soulsborne ramble

possible Dark Souls AU following the 'bad' ending where Derek is a (failed) Firekeeper

He made the grave mistake of destroying instead of linking the flame causing the world he knew to fall to fire and ruin, killing everyone, and so he is forced to rot alone in the world he destroyed until it is time to rebuild and the cycle is to begin again

Has been there for centuries serving the new Ashen Ones/Champions of Ash but he is cursed - either he leads them to death or they die of their own natural/unnatural causes

Because he did not take the value of life seriously he is condemned to constantly bear the weight of his mistake and be reminded of everyone he has killed - because of this he is very penitent, sad/sickly in demeanor and speaks in monotone

He acts like he does not know anything about his past, even going as far as forsaking his own name, but he remembers everything, constantly, and it wears down on his psyche

Idk, I just think it would be neat to play around with the trauma of what he'd done completely warps his personality into an (almost) catatonic state

Possible dialogue lines:

When approached by the player character at the start of the game (first meeting) - "Ah... another one.."

If initiating contact to open his action menu - "..What does thou want?"

If you choose to ask 'who are you?' from the action menu - [cold, yet still monotone] "That is of no importance to you."

If you choose to ask 'where am I?' from the action menu - "In a place that will either be your salvation or your tomb... ..I haven't decided that yet.."

When closing the action menu - "No go...follow the path of the others.. ...if you're lucky maybe you won't meet the same fate."

If you keep trying to talk to him after exhausting all his dialogue options - "Why must you plague me with your questions.."

After returning once you've beaten the first boss and choosing the new option of 'Others?' from the action menu - "Ah... they're dead.. .. everyone's dead.. .. maybe..if you're lucky...you won't succumb to the same fate"

Further progression of the game unlocks dialogue of him kneeling on the ground in a remorseful state - "Dead. ... they're all dead... All because...of me.."

After progressing the game and choosing the option 'I know who you are' from the action menu - [shocked but spiteful] "You know nothing."

If choosing the option 'You killed them.' from the action menu - [through gritted teeth] "Shut up...shut up.. ...Is it not enough for you that I have to live with the weight of what I've done?"

When opening the action menu after triggering the above dialogue - "...You won't die, will you.."

When closing the action menu after triggering the above dialogue - "Leave... ..suffer the fate of the others."

-Once the 'You killed them.' option is chosen he becomes more resentful towards the player character and more reluctant to have any sort of communication with them, dialogue changes from saying they have a chance of avoiding death to actively telling them to/asking why they haven't died yet

This is all I have so far. I might add more after I can flesh the AU out more. Thank you for letting me ramble 🥹

[shiniganja]

🤷‍♂️ I guess I just have to take estrogen suppositories now

[shiniganja]

tbh I'm nice as hell but I have major sensitivity issues and public cafeteria style breakrooms just immediately go over my tolerable sound and contact threshold and I'd rather interact with people on my own volition instead of having it feel forced so I'm just 🤷‍♂️ naturally a weird recluse at my job idk

[the-soul-huntress-archive]

{OOC: It's okay, Shortcake. *pats*

You'll get a new adoptive mother, soon enough. Maybe.

*shot*}