#shitpostradamus

[jackthebard]

parody song of "Another One Bites The Dust" by Queen that's about sandwiches called "Another One Bites the Crust"

send post

[jackthebard]

Me: Make the dish, rat.

Charles Entertainment Cheese, a very powerless rat: [sob] I'm just a mascot character, man! I don't know how to-

Me: [thumbs back the hammer] Make the vegetable dish, Rat in the Hat, or I shoot the other testicle.

[jackthebard]

Very serious conversations with my bestie

[jackthebard]

if you physically identify with food does that make you munch-kin

[jackthebard]

if you reblog this post you will receive an unsettling, ominous, or outright bizarre message in your inbox

you will desire context and yet you will receive none

[jackthebard]

Me: *grumbling to myself on the way home from the grocery store*

My Mom: What the fuck did you think they meant when they said they had Turkey Dogs?

[jackthebard]

look at this abomination that @oranguin got me and so the meme war begins

[jackthebard]

Oran, through giggles: Look in Octo Valley

Me: What?

Oran, through even more giggles: Just look.

Me: [switches over to the discord chat to see an alignment chart. The Alignment chart is "What do you think of when you hear 'Pearl' with the three points being Spongebob, Steven Universe, and Splatoon.

Me: ...

Me: Jen, if it sounds like I'm walking away, it's because I am.

Jen: [continued uncontrollable giggles]