Fandom: Durarara!!
Characters/Ships: Shizuo/Celty, past!Shinra/Celty, Izaya/Shinra; Shinra, Celty, Shizuo, Izaya, Tom, more to-be-added
Rating: T
Length: Chapter 5/?; 2046 words
Summary:
First he was running late and now he’s unexpectedly early... and then there’s this matter of “a scene straight out of a chick-flick” that Tom-san keeps talking about, and Shizuo really just wants to get on with his day-job.
AO3 Link
Read on Tumblr: (previous chapter–You Are Here–Coming Soon)
(A/N) Lookie-lookie, new chapter! Sorry for the delay. ^^;; This is the next Shizelty part, and I’ll be sure to post it’s IzaShin counterpart some time tomorrow. <3 Thanks for sticking with me! ;w;
"Shiiit!"
Celty was woken not only by the shout, but by a sharp pain in her ankle and a tremendous crash. Bolting upright on her futon, the first thing she realized was that the house was still dark, save for the light slanting in through the curtains. The second thing she realized was that Shizuo had apparently tripped over her feet--the pain she had felt--and subsequently careened headfirst into the coffee table--the crash she had heard.
"Shit, Celty, I'm sorry...!" came his hasty apology, gasped between grit teeth. "Shit, and here I was trying not to wake you..."
Celty found she could only laugh, standing as Shizuo scrambled to pick himself up. She could see, in the dim light, that he was halfway dressed, and as she watched he stumbled back towards his bedroom.
"Sorry!" he called again. "I'm fucking late, wouldn't you know? I fell back asleep after my stupid alarm went off!"
Shaking off whatever sleepiness still clung to her shoulders, Celty moved to draw the curtains; when Shizuo appeared again he was blinking disorientedly, shoes in one hand and tie undone around his neck. His hair was slightly wet.
"Sorry," he muttered again, even as he hurried over to the table to grab his wallet. "Was just moving too fast for my own damn good."
"Hang on," Celty scribbled hastily, and when Shizuo didn't see it she grabbed his shoulder. Although supremely agitated, undoubtedly about the time he was losing, the blonde paused to read her next words. "I can give you a ride, you know. That'll save you a few minutes, won't it?"
Shizuo blinked, some of the tension draining from him. "You'd do that?"
"Of course!" Celty replied, bewildered as to why he would even question it. "Just give me a moment to change and I'll be set to go."
When Celty reemerged, Shizuo had gotten his shoes on and was halfway into a cigarette; he ground it out quickly in a handy ashtray when she appeared.
"Are you sure?" he asked, expression some strange mixture of meekness and mistrust. Celty, fixing her helmet into place, nodded.
"It isn't as if I have anything else to do," she said. "Even if I did, of course I'd do anything I can to help you out. We're friends, right? And you're doing so much for me, as it is."
"None of that has anything to do with this..." Shizuo muttered, and Celty wondered why he was acting the way he was. Still, she retrieved Shooter from his corner of the living room and guided him calmly out onto the catwalk.
"You'll just have to give me directions," she held up, and Shizuo nodded sullenly as he followed. They stayed on-foot until Celty had gotten Shooter down the stairs, much to the fascination of several nosy neighbors, and then mounted the bike. Shizuo's grip around Celty's waist was surprisingly light.
"Yeah, um... head that way, I guess."
Kicking her bike to life, Celty joined the flow of traffic with little trouble. If anything, it felt good to be back out on the streets of Ikebukuro.
I have been rather... cooped up in Shizuo's apartment, haven't I?
The trip took a surprisingly short amount of time, and Tom wasn't even at their meeting place by the time the pair arrived. Shizuo hopped off of Shooter, stretching his back.
"Damn... that was like, nothing." He chuckled. "Now I'm early."
"You didn't have breakfast, did you?" Celty held up. "There's a cafe right on the corner, and I'll stay a while if you want some company."
Shizuo's eyebrows arched, but he shrugged. "Sure. That'd be fine, I guess." He trudged off to retrieve something from said cafe, and Celty was left to lean against Shooter as she enjoyed the breeze; the engulfing sounds of the city streets.
Her familiar nickered affectionately, and she stroked his handlebars.
"Right..." Shizuo murmured, when he'd returned. "Sorry I couldn't get you anything."
Celty held up her hands, amused by his constant fretting over such things. They sat side-by-side on the edge of a planter, in relative silence, Shizuo munching on a breakfast pastry and Celty content with the company of him and the city around her. A few passersby spared them a glance, but they were otherwise left in peace. Their shared silence was comfortable; peaceful, and the spare time passed easily.
Eventually checking the clock on his cellphone, Shizuo drained the last of his coffee-laced milk and crumpled the cup. "Well, Tom-san should turn up any minute, now," he said, then turned to Celty. "Thanks. For the ride and for staying, I mean."
"Any time," the dullahan held up brightly. But something caught her eye before Shizuo could get up, and she motioned for him to hold still. His tie still hung undone beneath his collar, and Celty leaned forward to fix it without much thought. Shizuo froze beneath her hands, and she noticed the skin of his neck take on a rosier hue than normal.
"You don't have to..." he muttered, but she shook her helmet. Hands occupied, she couldn't replied properly until she'd finished her task.
"It's no trouble, really! Have a good day at work, okay?"
"Okay..." Shizuo mumbled, then held up a hand to return her wave as she hopped onto Shooter's back. A moment later she was gone, vanishing into the flow of Ikebukurian traffic.
... ... ...
"Care to explain that little exchange?"
Shizuo jumped, realizing belatedly that he was being watched. Tom Tanaka approached him with a swaggering walk; a toothy grin.
"Is that why you wanted a spare futon? And here I thought you accidentally broke your bed or something like that."
"She needed a place to stay," Shizuo said gruffly, trying not to appear flustered as he ducked his head. "I'm her friend. Of course I stepped up."
Tom sniggered. "In all the time I've known you, I never pegged you for such a player. Good for you!"
"Hey!" Shizuo snapped, though not with a dangerous flaring of temper--just an average defensiveness. "She just got out of a really shitty relationship. I'm not... I mean, she probably wouldn't look twice at someone like me, anyway. I'm just being a good friend."
"She was <i>fixing your tie</i>," Tom stated. "That was like a scene out of a chick-flick, man."
"Neither of us are thinking like that, okay?" Shizuo insisted. "She was just being nice. She's a nice person." A very nice person; sweet, kind... tender and compassionate. Intelligent. Brave. Skilled. Trustworthy. <i>Gorgeous</i>.
<i>"You're so fucking desirable it's almost not fair!"</i>
Shizuo's face grew hot as he remembered saying that the day before, and he suddenly clapped a hand across his mouth. Tom, though not privy to the memory, grinned even more gleefully. <i>Shit. Shit, I almost...
I don't want to fuck this up.</i>
"Listen..." he said aloud, partially to Tom and partially to himself. "She's not... I mean, I'm not some asshole who goes for the rebound, you know? She's having a hard time, and I'm not going to make it any harder. Besides, I'm not about to fuck up our friendship. And besides <i>that</i>, she deserves someone way better than me, okay?"
"Whatever you say," Tom said listlessly, with a shrug. His boyish grin made it clear he wasn't convinced, but he also knew better than to press the matter. He could get away with <i>some</i> amount of teasing, but he wasn't so entirely immune to Shizuo's anger that he would take any chances. So he began walking; motioned. "C'mon, then. Work awaits."
Shizuo, recovering himself, nodded. But, even as he followed, he caught himself gazing back the way that Celty had disappeared.
<i>I'm... lucky,</i> he told himself firmly, a hesitant pleasure warming his chest.He pulled a cigarette from his vest pocket as he followed Tom. <i>She's a great friend. I'm really lucky to know her.</i>
... ... ...
Being out that morning had stirred something in Celty, and that same evening she held up a statement for Shizuo to read.
"I'm going to go back to work."
The blonde's head fell to the side as he looked at her. She felt her shoulders shake slightly with laughter at his questioning expression.
"It's only fair that I start paying you some form of rent."
"You don't need to," Shizuo rumbled, blinking honestly at her. "We're friends. Besides, it's not like you're even costing me anything. You don't eat. I bummed the spare futon off Tom-san--he wasn't using it. It's not like the extra water you use to shower is making my bills any worse or anything. And you did me that favor this morning, anyway."
Again Celty laughed silently. His denial that she needed to pay him any rent was based in simple fact--of course.
"It's not just that," she wrote out. "I'm living here, aren't I? I should be contributing."
"I can... yeah, I know exactly how you feel," Shizuo admitted, sitting back beside her. They were almost close enough to touch. "I would feel the same way. But I've still got to tell you that you don't have to. If you want to for yourself, go ahead, but don't do it on account of me."
Celty felt her shadows billow with pleasure at his blunt brand of thoughtfulness. "I know. Thank you, Shizuo. But I'll really feel much better. Besides, it's about time I get off this couch and do something productive again."
"Okay," Shizuo replied simply, then glanced over again. "Are you going back to courier work?"
"That IS what I'm good at."
"It's dangerous though, right?" Shizuo pressed. "I know you can handle yourself, but this is your chance to look for something else, if you want."
"Working in the underground is the only thing I CAN do," Celty replied, not entirely bothered by the fact. "I mean, who else would hire a mysterious motorcyclist who never took off their helmet?"
"I would ask Tom-san if we need more help where I work..." Shizuo murmured, then growled good-naturedly, "but you're too damn soft-hearted for that sort of job. You'd believe all the stupid stories."
"Not ALL of them!" Celty objected. "Maybe some... sure..."
"Not a good line of work for you," Shizuo decided, then reached over for his cigarettes. He took the time to light one and take one long drag before continuing. "I think you'd make a good teacher. Or a traffic cop."
Celty's shadows spluttered in surprise, but then she bumped her shoulder against Shizuo's. He chuckled throatily and gave her a brief, sideways hug.
"What? I'm being serious, you damn woman..."
But then he withdrew physically; stood; stretched. Again Celty found herself noting the rippling strength in his lean limbs, hidden beneath the thin layer of black and white clothing. As he relaxed, she averted her gaze and pulled out her new cellphone. She had had a bit of money on her when she had left, and she had used a chunk of it to buy a cheep, prepaid phone. The one that Shinra gave her had been thrown off an arching freeway after Izaya had tried to contact her on it.
Her PDA, however, stayed stowed in her shadowy clothes--turned off, perhaps never to be turned back on, but still kept safe on her person.
After a brief flip through the contacts she had transferred into the small phone, Celty selected one. Most of her jobs had come through Shinra or Izaya, and without either of them as an option there was only one person she trusted enough to reach out to.
"Shiki-san? It's Celty. I'm sorry for being out of communication... I was wondering if you might have work for me."
The Awakusu executive was a man of reasonable integrity, considering his profession; he was also a family friend of the Kishitanis, and knew about her situation in as much detail as anyone outside of her immediate circle.
"Celty-san," was the response, "I'm glad to hear from you. In fact I do, and I'd be happy of your dependable skills."
Celty's shadows billowed with satisfaction. "Perfect! Just send me the details, as usual."
"Right. They're being finalized tomorrow morning, so I'll call you then."
Fandom: Durarara!!
Characters/Ships: Shizuo/Celty, past!Shinra/Celty, Izaya/Shinra; Shinra, Celty, Shizuo, Izaya, more to-be-added
Rating: T
Length: Chapter 3/?; 2758 words
Summary:
Certain though she is that she’s capable of falling in love, Celty Sturlson is unconvinced that anyone but Shinra is capable of loving her. And then there’s this matter of “rebounds” that the internet warns of.
AO3 Link
Read on Tumblr: (previous chapter–You Are Here–next chapter)
(A/N) Canon-Divergence in which Celty doesn’t forgive Shinra after the Dollars gathering.
New part! Actually, two new parts for this AU! Here’s the Shizelty half of the update.
I’ve altered the way I write the chat room slightly to make it more consistant with the LNs. Apologies if it causes confusion!
Shizuo was attractive. Celty Sturlson had always known that objectively, but it had never been an overtly important fact to her personally. When she had begun to take note of the "masculinity" that Shinra Kishitani possessed, it had crossed her mind that someone might notice the same things in Shizuo... but she herself had only had eyes for her underground doctor.
Living with Shizuo Heiwajima lent her a slightly different perspective on the matter.
The blonde was far more primally attractive than her Shinra--a relic of the days when the strongest male had earned the right to pass on his genetic code through displays of strength and superior adaptations. Besides that, he was ruggedly handsome--chiseled jawline and soft, golden hair; lean, muscular body; a nice smile and deep, kind eyes.
Beyond that, he was such a wonderful friend--good-hearted, brave, loyal, intelligent, peace--
"I'm home!"
Celty jumped, the sound of the television crashing back into her consciousness along with the sound of the front door closing. She sat up on the couch, having relaxed into it as her thoughts roamed wherever they would, and scrambled for her pen and paper as Shizuo trudged into the living room.
"What a day..." he groaned, flopping down onto the cushion beside her. He smelled like cigarettes and the streets of Ikebukuro, an abrasive but not unpleasant scent. Celty offered him the remote, but he shook his head. "Nah, keep it. I'm not really gonna watch it, so just put on whatever."
Celty retracted her hand, then scribbled down, "Welcome home."
Shizuo graced her with one of his smiles--a smile so warm that it made her insides heat up. "Good to be back. It's nice to come home to someone, rather than an empty apartment, you know?"
"I'm glad," Celty wrote, wondering if he could tell that her hand was shaking.
Am I just... imagining things...? she wondered, then put a conscious effort into calming her emotions. If she let herself get too worked up, the shadows leaking from her neck might give her away like a human blush. If it was Shinra she was dealing with, he might still be able to ferret out her anxiety, but Shizuo--
The blonde tilted his head. "Is something up?"
Celty's shadows billowed despite her efforts, jumping as Shizuo exceeded her expectations by a leap and a bound. He was good at reading her, she knew, but perhaps better than she had counted on.
"N-Nothing..." she wrote, then fidgeted before adding, "My thoughts are just... running away from me."
"Anything you want to talk about?" Shizuo asked, his eyes sharp and earnest. Celty waved her hands in a negative motion.
"Not really. Thank you, though."
Shizuo watched her for a moment, then shrugged. "Alright. Just let me know." He rose with a soft grunt, then stretched his back with a visible shiver and strolled off toward the kitchen. Celty followed him with her gaze, the trembling in her fingers growing worse.
Is this... the same...
... as what I felt for Shinra...?
She didn't have the same history with Shizuo; he hadn't even once proclaimed love for her, or done anything that might nudge her in that sort of direction. Yet there was a similarity in her feelings for the two men that she couldn't seem to shake off.
But am I just...
... trying to fill the gap left by Shinra...?
Shizuo had been very kind--again--in letting his guest use his beat-up old laptop. The connection speed was considerably slower than she was used to, but Shizuo wasn't really an internet person so it was understandable. Although skeptical that Shizuo knew how to--or would--check her browser history, Celty had gone into a private internet window and searched, "romantic feelings for best friend after end of relationship."
REBOUND
That was the word that was repeated on countless message boards and blogs: rebound. It seemed a horribly vulnerable, emotional reaction. She was fairly certain she was experiencing something like this "rebound" phenomenon, and that unsettled her tremendously.
There was one big discrepancy, though, between her feelings and those described by the web: the internet warned that rebounds were often with arbitrarily-chosen people for poorly-thought-out reasons, or for no reason at all.
There were many reasons--objective reasons, Celty was sure--to fall in love with Shizuo Heiwajima.
The reasons Shizuo Heiwajima should fall in love with her, however, were considerably fewer. Is... anyone capable of falling in love with me...? the dullahan wondered idly. Or was Shinra... a bizarre exception of a human being...? A truly strange pervert to be attracted to someone... something... like me...?
The thought of being alone didn't scare Celty, but if she was honest she would prefer to love and be loved by someone she could share her Ikebukurean existence with. Her relationship with Shinra had been perfect, in that regard.
"Hey, Celty?" Shizuo's voice made the dullahan jump. "Come here for just a sec, would you?"
Celty rose immediately, TV left on thoughtlessly in her wake. When she rounded the corner into the kitchen, she was surprised to find her blonde host leaning forward over the counter, glowering at the cutting board.
"Have you heard anything from either of them?"
"?" Celty held up the scribbled mark, but Shizuo didn't need to look up at it to understand her question.
"Izaya's been missing... and I haven't seen Shinra around, either. I asked Simon about it today, but...
"He hasn't seen either of them, either."
Shizuo sounded earnestly troubled, so Celty answered honestly. "No, I haven't. I have ways of getting in touch with Izaya, for work, but I haven't heard from him or tried to get in touch myself." Her lack of communication with Shinra, she thought, spoke for itself.
Shizuo sighed. "Yeah... that's what I thought. It just makes my skin crawl when that Flea stays quiet for too long... he's usually got something nasty in the works... shit..."
Celty fidgeted, then wrote, "I can try to contact him, if you want?"
"Nah... no use asking for trouble..." Shizuo muttered, then straightened and fished a pan out of the cupboard above his head. "I was just wondering."
Shizuo was a lot sharper than anyone gave him credit for, Celty thought. He wasn’t only thinking about Izaya--his mention of Shinra at the beginning of the conversation had given him away.
"Are you worried about Shinra? Do you think Izaya might have done something to him?"
"Shinra can take care of himself," Shizuo grunted, moving over to the refrigerator. But he didn't answer her question. "You should know that."
Celty's hands worked slightly at her piece of paper. But Shinra's been... compromised... she wanted to object, although she didn't allow herself to write it. As it was, she sat down slowly against the pantry door, unwilling to return to the solitude of the living room.
Shizuo didn't try to make small talk, and soon the scents of cooking things filled the kitchen. That prompted Celty, in an attempt to escape melancholy thoughts, to pose a question that she'd had for days.
"How did you learn to cook?" It wasn't a skill she had ever thought her friend possessed.
Shizuo shrugged. "I don't have the money to eat out all the time. Ramen's good, I guess, but it gets real old real fast. So I just sort of... picked it up. It's not like I know a bunch of fancy recipes or anything."
"That's... amazing." For someone who had attempted and failed to cook--for Shinra, she acknowledged with a pang--many times, it was awe-inspiring.
"Not really," Shizuo muttered. "Pretty useless, I mean. It'd be nice if I could offer you some food, but it doesn't do much good there, either. Pretty damn useless skill if there's no one around to eat with."
That muttered train of thought surprised Celty, and she had to admit that it would be incredibly nice to share a meal with Shizuo. But that only drew her own shortcomings as something inhuman back to the forefront of her mind.
"Sorry..."
"Don't apologize, you idiot!" Shizuo snapped, then muttered something crossly at the stove.
Even knowing that it might not be the best moment, Celty couldn't help but hold up, "Can I ask you a question, Shizuo?"
"As long as it isn't anything stupid..." the blonde grumbled, and Celty wondered if what she wanted to ask qualified. But Shizuo had never truly lost it with her--snapped and sniped, yes; grumbled fairly frequently; lost control in her presence several times. But his temper had never actually been unleashed toward her, and that lent her confidence.
"Do you think that anyone else is capable of loving something inhuman like me? Shinra did, and I'm... I wonder if I'll ever come across someone else who--"
"Idiot!" Shizuo snarled, before she could even finish writing. Her pencil skittered a wild line across the paper as it was snatched from her hand, and she watched in astonishment as Shizuo ripped it to tiny pieces before tossing them carelessly onto the stove. Then the blonde's forefinger was jabbing toward where her face would have been as he leaned in close, his eyes flashing like the tongues of flame exploding into life on his stove.
"What the hell kind of a question is that?" Shizuo demanded. "It should be fucking obvious, you idiot! Anyone in their right mind would be lucky to have you! Shinra's nothing that special, that only he can love someone as incredible as you! If anything, you're the only one that twisted bastard had a chance in hell of getting to love him back, so he's the one who's really lost out!"
A nervous laugh vibrated through Celty's chest, but Shizuo wasn't finished.
"You listen here," he growled, getting so close that Celty felt a flare of panic. "You're gorgeous, inside and out. You're so fucking desirable it's almost not fair, so don't you dare think otherwise. Shinra messed up, bad, when he lost you. It's his loss, not yours--you'll find someone a thousand times better in no time at all, you got that?"
Celty forced herself to nod as best as one can without a head, and Shizuo let out a satisfied little huff before drawing fully back. As the dullahan straightened herself against the cabinet one more, she wondered what she might say if Shizuo hadn't ripped up her only method of communication.
I might confess, right now...
"Someone a thousand times better?" Could that be you, Shizuo?
When she thought about possibly saying that, she was quite glad that her blonde host had torn up her paper.
... ... ...
--SETTON HAS ENTERED THE CHAT--
【Oh, hello, Setton! It's been a while!】
【Are you well?】
[Well enough. Thanks for the concern.]
【Of course! It's been almost a week since you were on! We were worried...】
[I'm quite alright. Thank you, though. I mean it.]
[You said 'we,' right? Is Kanra around?]
【I think she's lurking rn... but I'm not sure.】
【You know how she is... ^^;;】
[I do.]
[Anyway, how are things? Sorry I haven't been on in so long...]
Chatting with her online friend soothed Celty's anxiety, and she was glad of him. Though she had hoped to speak to the seemingly all-knowing admin of their chat room sanctuary, she quickly decided that it was for the best that Kanra wasn't around. The conversation moved smoothly between her and Tanaka Taro for nearly an hour, when at long last her friend typed a farewell.
【Well, I should go. I have school tomorrow, haa...】
[Get some sleep then, definitely!]
[Thanks for staying on so long.]
【Of course! I'm here any time you need to talk.】
[Thanks.]
[Sleep well.]
【Good night!】
--TANAKA TARO HAD LEFT THE CHAT--
Celty was one click away from being home-free; from exiting the chat room and being, for the moment, unreachable. But, at that exact second...
<Private Mode> 《You wanted me, Setton dear?》
<Private Mode> [Oh! Hello, Kanra. So you were lurking, haha.]
<Private Mode> 《Just not feeling entirely social tonight. But if you need me, Setton, I'm here for you.》
<Private Mode> [That really means a lot... thank you, Kanra.]
<Private Mode> 《So what was it you needed, my dear?》
<Private Mode> [I was wondering if you knew of an information broker by the name of Izaya Orihara.]
There was a beat.
<Private Mode> [You seem to know all about Ikebukuro, you know. And even though he operates out of Shinjuku, he's very active here in Ikebukuro, too. I was wondering if you had heard any rumors about him.]
<Private Mode> 《I know of him.》
<Private Mode> 《But I'm afraid I don't have much useful information about him. I've never had direct dealings with him, and I haven't heard his name tossed around in a while. A week, at least.》
<Private Mode> [Oh...]
<Private Mode> 《From what I have heard, he's bad news. I've tried to steer clear of him as much as I can.》
<Private Mode> 《Your friend Kanra plays with some dangerous people, but he's a bit out of my depth. I'd recommend avoiding him--at all costs.》
<Private Mode> [Aah... thank you, Kanra. I'll keep that in mind.]
<Private Mode> 《Is there anything else? If I can help you out in any way, Setton, you know I will.》
<Private Mode> 《I know Taro already asked, but are you really alright?》
<Private Mode> [Yes...]
<Private Mode> [I recently... lost where I was living... But I'm staying with a trusted friend. I'm okay.]
<Private Mode> [Thank you, Kanra.]
<Private Mode> 《I'm so sorry!! If there's ANYTHING you need, please let me know!》
<Private Mode> 《And remember: steer very, very clear of this Izaya Orihara character. He'll only make a bad situation worse for you.》
<Private Mode> [Kanra...]
<Private Mode> [If you don't mind me asking... you said you haven't had personal dealings with Orihara... but you speak very knowledgeably of him. What IS your connection to him?]
<Private Mode> [Y-You don't have to answer, of course. I might be overstepping my bounds.]
<Private Mode> 《I don't mind.》
<Private Mode> 《It's true that I don't know him personally, but... I've seen first hand what he does to people's lives.》
<Private Mode> 《And I've heard... from a trustworthy source...》
<Private Mode> 《... that he's even got his sights set on the Black Rider next. Can you even imagine?》
... ... ...
Celty lay awake on the futon that had become hers long after the apartment was dark, Shizuo presumably fast asleep in his room. He only had the one bedroom and, although he had offered it to her, she had insisted that she was fine setting up camp on the living room floor. Usually she slept soundly enough there, although that night her dear friend Kanra's words wouldn’t let her rest. She couldn't help but wonder why Izaya Orihara had seemingly disappeared... and just about a weeks ago.The timing was simply too--
"Celty?"
The dullahan jumped violently at his voice, scrabbling against restrictive blankets as she bolted upright. In the dim light, she could barely make out Shizuo standing in the doorway of his bedroom.
"I heard you--tossing and turning," he explained flatly. "Is everything okay?"
Needing some way to reassure him, Celty twisted to grope for a notepad on the coffee table. But just as she found one, a large hand closed over hers, startling her.
"Hey." Shizuo sounded mildly put-out. "I can tell you're not okay, you know? Anything you'd try to write on a dumb sheet of paper would be a lie, and you know it."
Celty's shoulders sagged with defeat, but she let herself be drawn up and bundled into a strong embrace. She wrapped her arms around Shizuo's broad shoulders, letting herself be comforted like a child.
"Have you thought about what you're going to do?" Shizuo murmured, after a moment. "You can stay here forever as far as I'm concerned, but losing your... I dunno, your direction must be... tough. I mean, when you thought about your future, you must have seen Shinra in it, right?"
It was either Shinra or my head... those were my two options... Celty thought with a sigh, and Shizuo's chest rumbled beneath her.
"Either that or looking for your head, right? It must... damn, it must be hard." His grip tightened on her. "I'm here for you, Celty... whatever you need, just tell me."
Having your arms around me is more than enough... Celty thought, before she could stop herself. Her grip tightened fractionally around Shizuo, and he responded ten-fold.
"And if you just need me to hold you, then damn it... I'll hold you forever. Got it?"
Fandom: Durarara!!
Characters/Ships: Shizuo/Celty, past!Shinra/Celty, (in future chapters) Izaya/Shinra; Shizuo, Celty, Shinra, Izaya, more to-be-added
Rating: T
Length: Chapter 1/?; 1972 words
Summary:
If she needed him, he would be there. Always.
For Durarara Rare Pair Month. <3
AO3 Link
Read on Tumblr: (previous chapter--You Are Here--next chapter)
(A/N) Canon-Divergence in which Celty doesn’t forgive Shinra after the Dollars gathering.
This is now part of a multi-chapter project! Check the above links for previous and next chapters. :3
Second part of THIS AU (I’m referring to the whole little series (yes, there will be more) as the “Unforgiven AU”), though they can definitely be read separately.
There is also now a third part of this AU. It’s the companion/mirror to this one.
The sound of her bike was as clearly distressed as a human cry of pain. Her friend wasn't nearby when he heard it, but he automatically tilted his head to get a better idea of where it was coming from.
Maybe... she wants to be alone...?
But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, Shizuo Heiwajima decided that it didn't matter one way or the other. He would go to her. If she needed him, he would stay; if she did want to be left alone, he would leave. It was simple. One way or the other, though, he would find out who had upset her. And then they would have to pay.
After nearly an hour of pacing around the city in maddening circles, led on only by the occasion howl of the familiar spirit, he spotted the dullahan swerving into an alleyway. It was easy to head her off, then, and she didn't attempt to swerve around him when he planted himself in front of her.
"Hey. Celty."
She nodded, then fished in her riding suit for a moment. What she pulled out was a small pad of paper and a pencil, much to Shizuo's surprise.
"Good evening," she wrote, as if it were all the normal course of things.
But Shizuo could tell, and from far more than the distressed cries of the familiar that had summoned him.
"What's wrong?" He took a step forward; saw her jump. But her nervousness wasn't due to fear; he knew her too well to think that. "You can talk to me, if you want."
Celty fidgeted. Then, still with that pencil and paper, "How did you know?"
Shizuo laughed faintly. "It's clear as anything. Shinra isn't the only one who can read you, you know."
Celty flinched at the name, and Shizuo stiffened. Something had either happened to Shinra, then... or Shinra had done something.
"If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine," the blonde murmured, taking another step toward her. "I mean, I get that. But talking helps sometimes, you know. And even if you don't want to talk about it, just give me a name and I'll make whoever hurt you pay. You know I will."
Celty shook her helmet. "No... no, I... don't want you to do that. But I appreciate it."
"It was Shinra, wasn't it?" Shizuo was certain, his teeth grit as he hissed the question. The absence of her PDA, the way she was acting, her last statement... "What the hell did that bastard do, Celty?"
The dullahan slumped down on the back of her motorcycle, which snorted with concern; she stroked the handlebars soothingly, and the horse nickered. Shizuo, although moving slowly, closed the gap between them.
"He hurt you, didn't he?"
"I'm not going back there," Celty held up, then gave a visible sigh. "He knew where my head was THIS ENTIRE TIME. He says he was afraid of losing me if I found it, and... I know that's the truth. I can't blame him. But that doesn't mean I can forgive him."
"... So it's over between you two?" Shizuo asked slowly. Relationships weren't his forte, but it still shocked him. He had always expected Shinra and Celty to sink deeper into whatever strange love they shared as time went on.
"He lied to me," Celty replied. "And on top of that, he admitted that he'd use anything--my own emotions, even--to keep me close to him. He manipulated me, and he'd do it again in a heartbeat if he thought he needed to.
"I... can't give him that sort of power over me."
"He shouldn't have that sort of power," Shizuo growled. "Damn twisted bastard... what the hell is he thinking?"
"It hurts..." Celty held up slowly, then scratched out, "I miss him... already.
"... This pain will fade, won't it?"
Shizuo grimaced. "Yeah... yeah, it will. I know it will." He didn't, really, but he thought that it would be a good, best-friend-type thing to say. What he said next, however, he earnestly believed. "You did the right thing, Celty."
"That... means a lot," the dullahan replied, then slumped slightly further over Shooter's handlebars.
"He doesn't deserve someone like you, not if he tries to pull shit like that," Shizuo muttered, shaking his head. "You did the right thing by leaving him. Bastard didn't realize what he had."
"I think he did," Celty disagreed. "He did... he DOES love me. And I probably still love him. I just... can't deal with this sort of deception."
"You shouldn't have to," Shizuo validated, nodding. "You're... strong, and independent, and you're special... and smart and beautiful and loyal and such a damn good listener and..." The words were coming too fast, suddenly, and Shizuo tried to stem their flow. He cleared his throat; adjusted his glasses. "He doesn't deserve you, not if he's trying to... to manipulate you into being with him." His teeth ground, the mere idea of Celty being treated in such a way--by his own friend or by anyone else--making his chest tighten.
The dullahan rose; moved slightly toward him. He heard his own name in her thoughts, although she hadn't written anything on her little notepad.
"Shit, I'm... I'm so sorry, Celty. He shouldn't have... I'm sorry."
The dullahan nodded slowly, her shoulders relaxing and her hands hanging limp at her sides. They stood in silence for a moment, but the two of them had never needed words.
<i>Can I hold you?</i> Shizuo asked with just a slight opening of his arms.
Celty flew to him.
The dullahan's grip might have been painful to anyone else, but Shizuo didn't flinch as she wrapped her arms around him; clawed faintly at his skin to hold him closer still. And he, in turn, embraced her--tightly, but with a conscious check of his strength.
"Hey, if you... need a place to stay..." Shizuo began slowly, and Celty drew back enough to look up at him; meet his earnest gaze, devoid of ulterior motives.
She leaned up; bumped the brow of her helmet against his forehead. And Shizuo smiled, pushing slightly back.
"Good. Okay. We can head back there now to start figuring things out, if you want. I mean, I'll need to go out and get a new futon, I know... but maybe that'll have to wait until tomorrow..."
He was speaking strictly stream of consciousness, but he didn't try to control it. Celty never minded when he started to ramble--one of the many thing he appreciated about her and their close relationship. He obeyed when the dullahan motioned for him to get onto the back of Shooter, then wrapped his arms around her and settled in as the usual shadowy helmet swirled into being around his head.
How could Shinra...? he wondered idly, then dismissed the line of thought. Next time I see him, I'll punch the perverted bastard...
And in the meantime, I'll look after her.
"Hey, Celty?"
The dullahan glanced slightly over her shoulder as Shooter began to edge out of the ally.
Taking that--correctly--as an indication that he should keep speaking, Shizuo continued. "I know you don't need anyone to take care of you, but... if you need someone to lean on, I'm here."
Celty sat still for a moment, even as she guided Shooter into the flow of Ikebukuro traffic. Then she simply nodded, and Shizuo smiled.
"I'm so sorry, Celty. But I know you'll be fine, and I'm here if you need me."
... ... ...
Celty Sturlson woke up the next morning in a smoke-scented bed--Shizuo Heiwajima's bed. It's owner wasn't present, having banished himself to his couch for the night.
She felt surprisingly at peace, considering.
Shooter nickered a good morning from where he was parked in the corner of the room. As Celty pushed herself up, she glanced over at the curtained-off window. She had never actually been over to her friend's apartment, and had been duly surprised by how nice it was. When she had admitted that, he had only laughed and insisted that he did like to keep the place presentable, even if no one ever came over.
The house smelled like bacon.
Celty stretched slowly, luxuriously, and then stood. She half-expected Shinra's cheerful morning greeting, and the thought of his smiling face sent burning knives into her chest. Her hands rose involuntarily, clenching into fists over where a human heart would beat.
... How do you feel right now, Shinra...? You must be in pain, too...
But Shinra wasn't her primary concern. For the time being, Celty was focused on picking up the pieces of her own shattered life--of facing a very uncertain future now that she had lost both her purpose and the person she had viewed as a partner.
However, a friendly face was there to greet her when she finally emerged from the bedroom, even in Shinra’s absence.
"How'd you sleep?" Shizuo asked, his hair ruffled and his eyes hazy with drowsiness. He was clad only in pajama pants and house-slippers, and Celty was momentarily flustered by the sight. But his demeanor was casual; he held up the pan of bacon he was cooking, motioning toward her. "I really want to offer you some, you know? It'd be the right thing to do, as a host. But you can't eat."
Celty felt an unexpected laugh bubble in her chest at his straightforward observation.
"It's the thought that counts," she held up on her notepad, and Shizuo frowned slightly.
"Guess so... still wish there was something I could offer you, though."
Celty's shadows billowed with surprise. "You gave me a place to stay!" she wrote rapidly. "Not only that, but you've been nothing but supportive this entire time!"
Shizuo still didn't look convinced. "I'm being a friend," he said simply. "You do the same for me all the time."
Celty started to object again, then simply moved forward to embrace him. Shizuo stiffened in surprise, then put the pan down to return her hug. It was the first time they had been so close, physically, during a moment when the dullahan didn't have her helmet on.
"Hey... you okay?" Shizuo asked softly. "Must be weird to wake up without Shinra, huh? I'm sorry."
Stop apologizing...! Celty objected with a rough punch; the hit might have dropped Shinra, but Shizuo didn't even flinch.
"What else am I supposed to say?" the blonde asked, sounding mildly amused as he rubbed absently at her back. "It sucks."
Celty relaxed slightly into him, then pushed away. "Right," she wrote, a bit shakily. "Eat your breakfast."
Shizuo smiled as he picked up a piece of bacon straight out of the pan, a stunt that would have severely burned a normal person's fingers. He still blew on it, though, before popping it into his mouth and then carried the whole pan with him into his living room. Celty, after a moment, followed him.
"I have work at 10," the blonde told her conversationally, "but you can stay here, of course." He shoved aside the blanket he had used the night before as he sat down on the couch, patting the cushion next to him. "I'll dig up a spare key in case you want to leave for a while, too."
Celty, after a brief hesitation, sat beside him. "I appreciate it."
Shizuo offered her the remote; Celty accepted, turning on the TV and wondering at how surreal it felt. The programing was familiar, as was the activity of watching it, but the smoky couch and company were entirely foreign.
Looking nervously over at Shizuo, who seemed largely impassive as he munched his breakfast and watched the news station she had arbitrarily left on, Celty edged closer to him. Then she did it again, and again, until she could lean lightly against his shoulder. He glanced briefly at her in surprise, then faced forward again and looped one strong arm around her shoulders.
"I'm here, Celty."
That's all I need to hear... was her silent reply, as she eased further into him. Thank you, Shizuo.
