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shuttle likes cowboys im putting her on blast

#jukebox.exe #SHUTUPSBUTUPSHUTUP (-Shuttle (paraphrasing))#shuttle.exe

Shuttle for fursona friday

note: replace shuttles horn with rhino beetle horn

#bc we all fw the bug thing #except like. mckayla hasnt shown interest #shuttle.exe #txt

it wpuld have probably been NICE to use simplyppural or something similar but now its shutting down so. we will just continue trying to keep track of eachother here :/

#plurality #this isnt the fault of whoever made it of course but the timing is ironox #ironic #uhhhh idk who i am rn..#shuttle.exe #maybe????#txt

we wanna fuck that vampire

#adendum: we wanna SMOOCH the vampire -shuttle #txt #bones.exe #jukebox.exe #shuttle.exe #this is about astarion its evolved from youtube to xlistener audios to fanfiction #which is odd because its usually the reverse #(astarion is a special case bc i dont care to get into bg3 i just like The Vampire)#(it helps thst i already Know dnd i guess)

I've been trying to do the probably "good", "right" thing for us by encouraging them to be more upfront about things and it hassss been. Shitty. This sucks...

Finally sketched how we're seeing mckayla and jukebox, at least

#plurality #art #jukebox.exe #shuttle.exe #mckayla.exe #bones.exe #it's just. I can't focus it's sapping all my energy #I have terrible moments of anxiety that range from this is fake and I'm a horrible person to this is real and I'm going to be dealing with #it for the rest of my life #I hate that it feels so physical and is disrupting things but that also feels like proof that it's real?#whoda thunk that repressing all of your inconvenient emotions would have consequences!#scared to end up being alone in my brain and have this all be for naut #not. naught. idk #but just as scared that there are actually other ppl in here who I cannot escape from #and above all that that feels offensive! nobody ASKED for this but damn it all here we are #and I'm??? trying to stop them from being people??? that sucks. but it's so terrifying to let go of the control over.. me. My body. My life.#yk?#uh..#vent tw #?#ugh

i do think this blog will be good for us (hopefully)

here we can get down our thoughts in a way that is clearly seperatly ours, without spiraling into a notebook and forgetting who said what. its a lot more public, which can be scary, but its also nice to know the void is actually listening.

#plurality #txt #shuttle.exe #texting is also just minutely easier than writing. takes less time to get down a single word #we dont have to worry abt legibility. etc

ugh. trying exposure therapy by talking as myself more on discord, rather than just watching and putting feelings towards bones. why is stringing words together so hard?

a feel like part of it might be because im still trying to... i guess build an identity for myself? i second guess my wording, my tone, if what im trying to say is even worth the hassle. its like im self aware of trying not to sound like bones. is that what learning how to unmask is? maybe its also just anxiety. when i posted my introduction (same server) i got so nervous our heart was pouding.

#plurality #shuttle #uh #shuttle.exe #????#txt #its still weird to feel my influence on the body...#its also weird to use I/me/my... im so used to we/us/our

#shuttle.exe

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