it has been... (checks posts) three years
uhh happy new year?
it's 2024 and tokyo revengers ended like over a year ago already. i wasn't there, unfortunately. i don't know what happened. i think i died lol but I'm back again for some reason.
the pandemic is done and over with, i haven't read or watched any anime for the past two years, and i'm less than two years away from graduating high school. which is amazing because when i started this blog, i was a second year in junior high.
i was cleaning out my gmail today and saw one saying that joukhr posted chapter 9 of second hand. didn't remember most of the story so i decided to read it and it wasn't until chapter 35 did i realize that it was already completed and i had 5 chapters left. finishing it had me sitting in silence, feeling hollow, feeling this growing desire trying to lurch out of me. i have come to a realization that that desire was to write, that desire was to go back to what younger me believed i was best in, that desire was to do something - to write something - that would also light a desire in others.
i definitely wasn't healthy during my tumblr writer era, i wasn't sleeping nor eating well, i didn't socialize and i ignored all of my friends and family in favor of the one i created in this site. i didn't feel like my truest self, like i created a persona that people would like. i wasn't the healthiest, but i definitely was happy.
i want to try again. i want to try writing again. this time, in a way that doesn't include me giving out everything that i have, everything that i am.
for the people who waited on me all this time, know that i have my pot of tea beside me, a glass of milk to add, and a plate of cookies. i thank you for your patience and your interest over the years, and i am back to making myself and other people happy with my writing once more. not just with tokyo revengers, i'll also show you all of the fandoms that once made me happy and is now pulling me back in like a teenager's favorite song on the bus ride home.
good day. see you soon.
(ps: aside from joukhr's fic, another reason why i came back is definitely because i accidentally deleted the first part of sister, sister while rereading my old works. it definitely pushed me to start writing again, even if it's just a rewrite.)