After the lasagna's made, coordination is a mouse-click away
By Rina Rapuano, Washington Post, January 16, 2012 Judith and David Pryor are accustomed to being the strong ones. Their only son, Hampton, was born 16 years ago with a severe genetic disorder called Mowat-Wilson syndrome, a rare condition that makes him unable to walk, talk or use his hands.
And while Judith credits her friends and family with providing an excellent support system, the couple--married for 20 years this May--describe themselves as fiercely independent.
"I think I'm pretty notorious for not asking for help," says Judith, 48, who lives with her family in the District's Mount Pleasant neighborhood. "Over the years with Hampton, we've just gotten good at managing."
But when Hampton experienced life-threatening complications after spinal surgery late last year, the couple's friends wondered how best to help the Pryors. "We said, 'Please don't visit us in the hospital.' It was too traumatic," Judith says. "You end up reassuring them that everything is okay, and you're not sure that it is."
As days turned into weeks, it became clear what the Pryors needed: food at home. Friends turned to SignUpGenius.com, a virtual signup sheet that organizes neighborly efforts.
SignUpGenius's creator, Dan Rutledge, says he never imagined all the ways people would use the site when it launched in 2008. He was just looking for a better system for keeping track of soccer-game snacks and church functions. Now he regularly receives e-mails describing creative applications that include coordinating progressive dinners and helping an entire California town plan a fundraiser for a sick child.
On his site, users can watch how-to videos throughout the signup process, and there's a "Planning Resources" tab with tips on how to organize volunteer efforts, parties and taking meals to friends.
In cases like the Pryors', it's up to the organizer to alert the family in need; discuss dates that require meal coverage and preferences regarding packaging or ingredients; and decide who should be contacted for donations. Once the e-mail goes out, friends can visit the site, choose a meal date and slot, and then follow the personal requests outlined in the message from the organizer. On SignUpGenius, the link goes dormant about a month after an event but can be reactivated. There is no charge for the service.
For almost six weeks, the Pryors would return from the hospital to find meals left in a cooler by the garage, sometimes with a bottle of wine, recipes, messages of support, flowers and reheating instructions.
When Hampton finally was able to come home from the hospital, the food kept coming, nourishing the whole family as he healed.
A friend of the Pryors' learned about the service when another friend was recuperating from surgery, but it's not just catastrophe that brings out the desire to help. Similar sites have caught on in new-parent circles, helping families cope with those chaotic, sleep-deprived first weeks after a birth.
As it happens, virtual sign-up services have a positive effect on the donors as well.
"I thought it was just so efficient and unobtrusive to the family we were trying to help," says Kristin Solheim, a friend of the Pryors whose idea to use SignUpGenius got the effort underway. You "feel like you're doing something at a time when you're feeling pretty helpless."