PistixKouha relationship/parenting HCs
So somewhere in all my exploring different AUs and dynamics, got the idea to crackship Pisti and Kouha together. They’d be happy but their relationship would be unlike traditional ones.
{children pics near end of post}
With Pisti ruling Artemyra where women lead and she’s known for having multiple boyfriends at once, as well as her mother’s hobby of collecting husbands--she’s all for polyandry.
Kouha, coming from Kou {where as Hakuryuu revealed to Alibaba that royal sons are given dozens of women every night (and like it’s normal for all royals as a duty to the bloodline)}--he doesn’t plan on settling down with just one woman, as long as he gets his mother some grandbabies.
But with Pisti ruling Artemyra and Kouha wanting to stay and help in Kou, they have a very open on&off relationship.
They would most likely hook up after the final arc.
After getting the top spots on karaoke and gymnastics, they’d take a close look at each other as competition. {Or maybe meet after both being invited to sing at Spartos/Kougyoku’s wedding--another ship w/ kids I’ll cover later} They’d hit it off with their bubbly personalities and exchange love advice. Pisti mentions her 5 at-the-time bfs and Kouha’s all “I've got JinJin, JunJun, and ReiRei"
They could start a dating school together to help others with their love lives. Their ultimate challenge is to see if they could get Yamuraiha and Sharrkan to admit their feelings for each other. {Spoiler: they fail, but Masrur succeeds with one push, getting those two to finally confront each other}
Pisti could teach Kouha to fake cry (which will really get his bros when he tries it out on them--I could go on on this, maybe I’ll post it up later?)
One day, Kouha comes to Pisti with a long list of names that they could name their children if they ever had any. He had done research on Artemyran names and jotted down all the ones that ended in -ha, bringing both culture’s naming schemes together in harmony.
Kouha: I know you wrote that having kids isn't good motivation for dating someone...but what about having kids just for the naming potential? Pisti: How is that any better??? Kouha: Well, for example, if you and I had kids, look at this long list of names I compiled. Pisti: *reads ... thinks ...* Okay, now I want a kid just so I can name them that *points to name meaning alcoholic*
~or~
Pisti says “Looks like I found 16 suitable names” to which Kouha replies “Then lets get busy!”
So in my Post-canon fic with Dewei and Henrius, Pisti and Kouha are respectively 37 and 36 years old. They have 2 children together so far (3rd will be coming later) Pisti has 4 other daughters from other bfs/husbands and wants a 7th before she’s done. Kouha has 5 kids from other wives and has no intention on being done yet.
With Pisti admiring those who’ve transcended gender and Kouha (I might have a biased view after RPing with someone that played Kouha as genderfluid with 6 genders they rotated through) being nontraditional, they raise their kids genderfluid-embracing all sexualities and orientations.
Again, here’s how their kids will be later in life, but they’re all much, much younger when we meet them in the story.
Alkooloucha means Alcoholic.
Ja’far “Rurumu-chopped” Pisti when he learned this child’s name. He refuses to call the child that. Thinking he can come up with a thousand names better than “alcoholic,” instead refers to the child as “Njamena Popohinuk Tef-Tef Tu Sharknahju” (like the first name he suggested to Masrur) or Sadi2--another child of happiness.
Kouen wishes Kouha picked a more tasteful name like one that would mean “sake.”
If Sinbad was around, he’d refer to Alkooloucha as his “favorite mini-general.”
Prostycha means Smuttily
And Pisti and Kouha just get away with it 😂 Or everyone is 🤦♂️🤦♀️ at this point and now just expects it of these two.
Esoroucha means Underclothes. Goes by Roucha (Clothes) for short.
So when Ja’far first learns the name meaning Clothes is relieved they finally gave one of their kids a “normal” name. Then he hears the full name/meaning and blows a gasket.