i hope to be so lucky in the future that i can treat my job as a side hobby and focus on my life

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i hope to be so lucky in the future that i can treat my job as a side hobby and focus on my life
do it or don't do it, the time will pass anyways
i want to know more about my favourite people's routines. call it boring, call it useless, but i want to know how long your showers take, what colour catches your eye among a huge pack of pens, what makes you worry, what spoon you liked as a child, all your little routines!!
i hate being in gr12 cus it just feels like damn everyone is more accomplished than i am and i shouldve played a school instrument and why didnt my parents force me to do sport and why didnt i volunteer more and join more clubs
siri, how do i stop comparing myself to every single person to ever exist?
propaganda i will never fall for:
the division between the arts and sciences
sometimes i hang out with my friend from a different (more outgoing, put-together) social circle and i love when its just us but gosh i could never be a part of her social circle because i love being a loser introvert nerd with too much screen time and too many hobbies and an addiction to academic validation and an awkward sense of humour