Reality Checks
as of today I got two emails from residency programs asking for updates on my Step 2 score. I don’t know what to say. obviously the answer is I won’t have my score by March 1, the deadline to match and even apply to SOAP, so I won’t be verified by my school and cannot be ranked by programs. I don’t really know if I even want to re-apply next year, but it’s just so scary to think about emailing all the programs I interviewed with and have to tell them “for personal reasons” I won’t be part of the Match this year. my advisor told me that I should say I’ll reapply next year because I’m still interested, but I feel like I’d rather say that I will stay in touch for possible opportunities in the future.
withdrawing my application is going to feel so scary and a super reality check. I’m disappointed in myself I didn’t get this worked out earlier. my therapist tells me “there is no universe where you could have done something differently” and I disagree.. but whatever.