#softkakumei

[chibimui]

softkakumei replied to your post: softkakumei replied to your post: ...

I know sometimes suffering is just suffering and there’s nothing pretty about it, but I just have the kind of personality where I have to find some meaning in it, lol. It is really hard, but I’m cheering you on. I really hope you can eventually turn back on this time and see it led you to where you wanted to be, in one way or another.

Everything you’re saying has been super helpful, and I appreciate all of it. I’m also the type of person who often tries to find meaning in bad things because if I’m going to suffer, I want to know at least why. That’s becoming a bit of a double-edged sword right now though because sometimes life just sucks, and because I can’t find a concrete reason I just keep blaming myself and seeing myself as the problem. (And sometimes I definitely am the problem, but anyway *cough*). 

And yeah, due to the nature of my job I’ve long given up on the notion that it’s the actual suffering which makes you better. It’s not the suffering, but the part where you are essentially forced to work on your weaknesses and build up your strengths.

I do think I will get to where I want to be eventually - wherever that is. I’ve always been a positive person in that sense. That life has a way of working itself out. But I’m also impatient af so... damn it, life needs to work itself out faster!

Again though, thank you for your reply and taking the time to talk to me. I really appreciate it a lot and it does give me a lot of strength and hope. I can say that I woke up this morning feeling... better. Okay. And I do think a lot of that was because of your replies that I read yesterday. So really, thank you. :)

[chibimui]

softkakumei replied to your post: Depressing personal ramblings #235215809. Feel...

The longer this process has gone on though, I think the better I’ve gotten to know myself professionally and what I really wanted. Not that it always felt that way, that’s something I can probably only say now as I feel like I could actually be nearing the end of the tunnel? But I really hope you’re closer to the end of your tunnel than you may think right now.

Thank you for your whole reply. I really appreciate it and the silent support. I know I have a tendency to ramble in my tags so I’m not actually sure how much I’ve actually shared, and it’s almost a bit embarrassing to know someone may have been keeping track of all my semi-silent freak outs, but really. Thank you.

Everyone says “job hunting sucks”, but it really isn’t just the job hunting. I feel like there’s so much wrapped into all of this for me since it really is my first step to being a working adult, and I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but the way everything has gone has just brought back practically all of my deepest fears and insecurities. Except somehow even worse because unfortunately I’m not a kid anymore, and I have more responsibility etc. etc. so.... yeah. 

But! I hope you hear back good news from the interview you went to! I’m definitely rooting for you as well ^^.

[handsomejosei]

softkakumei replied to your post: also this has nothing to do with anything but i...

also same on both Eita and Hikari but i did fall behind super early on the previous taiga… it seemed watchable and i’ve missed seeing him in Normal Things so at some point i’ll have to restart it. i legit don’t remember the last project he was in that i really loved tho :((((

me too. i want to get back to it because i read good things and i like the cast very much! i still need to watch Mix (i know... what am i doing...) as well. SAME. i can’t say i appreciate his film choices except for the former and i think he should go back to doing what he does best, but i’m saying this mostly for myself lmao. i just want to see him be charming!! again. anone was all over the place but i liked how weird it was anyway and he was weird too. :’) everyone else that i like/follow is in all the things but these two, whyyyyyyyyy.

[handsomejosei]

softkakumei replied to your post “also this has nothing to do with anything but i just want to point out...”

I WANT TO WATCH YUUZAI SO BADLY BUT I KEEP FORGETTING ABOUT IT CONSTANTLY!!!!!! I'm in a CONSTANT STATE of remembering it and thinking "oh no i have to get that!!!" and then i forget again.... have you yet? i was really surprised it didn't get any awards buzz given the staff seemed so baity and the trailer looked so good, so i was wondering if it was actually as good as it looked...

for me, i didn’t forget but it was more of “i need to watch it but!!!!!” and then i finally did it recently! so yes! i have. idk if you will like it, i mean, it’s not a subject matter that requires liking either but just in terms of how it was executed? i thought it was rather well done with how it approached themes of forgiveness and atonement but a particular plot thread mostly diminished whatever goodwill i had towards it and i wish that it hadn’t happened, otherwise it would’ve been solid imo. but everyone is really great in it. eita too ofc, though i felt he could’ve been given more to work with (he’s the main but it’s also more of an ensemble thing). also his dynamic with toma was nice, he also has scenes with kaho too! i think give it a go so you can decide for yourself?.. but i definitely think you will have issues with it, lol.

[handsomejosei]

also this has nothing to do with anything but i just want to point out that on my tokyo trip i saw more CMs and ad campaigns for BOTH kazama and kei than i did for anyone else in JE!!!!!!!! EVERYONE FROM SOREDEMO HAS BROKEN OUT NOW!!!!!! WHO SAW THIS COMING????? WE DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YES!!!!!! btw, good thing you brought this up because kazama is EVERYWHERE and i’m so happy!!! FINALLY. all the lead roles are coming in at last!! the most recent one too, which you probably already know about? and re: kei, i couldn’t be happier too. i don’t think he gets rest at all from all the dramas and movies he’s filming at the same time but i’d be lying if i said i didn’t love that he’s in all the things, lol. 

..did you ever watch yuuzai? 

[kselavie]

if i run across the keychain in august, i'll get it for you! :)

aaaaaaaaaa, meimi, you remain the greatest! i'll cherish it forever if you do :)))

[chibimui]

softkakumei replied to your post: I beat KH3

yeah hikki reaaaaaaally phoned that one in

Yeah. It’s super disappointing. Compared to her overall discography Hikari and Passion are sort of in the middle of my ranking, but when you put them in the context of Kingdom Hearts I love them. Literally began crying when an instrumental version of Hikari started playing during the game’s final cut scene and then of course it transitioned to her new song (I can’t even bother to remember the name) and was just so put off by how meh it is. /sigh.

[topazera]

softkakumei replied to your post “I’m grateful that they’re giving us time to process and come to terms...”

I'm COMPLETELY shocked at this. It wasn't what I expected coming out of 5x20 at all... I thought their fierceness about staying as 5 was in response to everything going on, not...this. :(

I was thinking of you~ You’ve been someone who has tipped me off about things I didn’t pick up on before... but I also thought everything you’ve been saying lately was especially positive. We all got blindsided by this being what was coming, I guess. :(