#spite gripes

[stubbornness-and-spite]

This happens more on my other accounts than this one, but y’all -

I don’t care if you like a lot of my posts in succession(spam liking or whatever). I actually like it. I’d appreciate some reblogs but I’ll take the likes.

But please

Please

If you’re not going to follow me after liking two dozen of my posts, why? Or shoot me a message. Say hey. My messaging is open and asks are on for a reason.

Seriously, a request, a prompt, an emoji, anything - I’m on this website for attention just like everyone else

[stubbornness-and-spite]

Goddamn, I hate my body.

I got sick(not too bad) which made my POTS act up. I have been carrying my cane to use as needed but I didn’t want to grab it from my bag to quickly talk to school administration. I only walked down a short hallway and stood for 5 minutes.

And now my legs are shaking and I needed to sit down.

I just want to live my life.

[stubbornness-and-spite]

I’m currently part of a study abroad program where I’m living with a roommate with a host family. And, if I’m understanding my host mom right, my roommate literally complained about my part of the room being messy, not to me, but to her behind my back, because I let it get out of hand while I’m laid up in bed with laryngitis and sinusitis that’s hitting me twice as hard because of my chronic illness and multiple autoimmune diseases.

Like, I have maybe 10 minutes of energy per day. Sorry, I’m using that to feed myself instead of for cleaning.

Because my host mom came in today, basically cleaned it for me and then had a talk with me about keeping it this way and respecting other people when we’re sharing a room with them.

I barely have the energy to sit up half the time! Yes, I’m leaving my nightstand cluttered and yes, I’m dropping notebooks and my purse just on my bed instead of off to the side, but not an inch of my clutter has left the confines of my nightstand, my bed, and the foot of my bed.

If I wasn’t sick, I’d get it. If she’d said something to me, I’d get it. But complaining to someone else that I’m too messy when I’m sick and then that person guilting me for being disrespectful to others’ space when I’ve barely gotten out of bed for two days? It feels like overstepping.

[stubbornness-and-spite]

Homesickness is hard. Especially when you’re in a place you want to be and doing things you want to do.

I’m having an amazing time living in Italy and learning Italian. Rome is amazing and I never want to leave.

I also miss home. I miss my tiny city with trash and random liquids in the street. I miss walking along my river and groaning at the lack of public recycling and the copious amounts of thinly veiled anti-homeless architecture.

I don’t really miss the good things that I love, like the beautiful skyline and the friendly people in the strangest shops. I know those things. I said ‘see you later’ to those things. I miss the dirty streets and too-expensive necessities and all the gross and nasty things that make my city feel like mine.

[stubbornness-and-spite]

Is it just me or is it common courtesy to turn down your phone brightness in a dark place with a lot of people like a concert or performance?

[stubbornness-and-spite]

Sometimes my mom thinks my queer and mentally ill humor is funny and sometimes she doesn’t get it and that’s a fine line I walk every day

[stubbornness-and-spite]

I have to make a phone call and I hate life /hyp /nsrs

[stubbornness-and-spite]

Please don’t reblog

I got hair color on a very nice pillow in my house because I didn’t realize I was leaning on it and I tried to get it off myself but the stain remover just made things worse. When I finally woke my mom up crying trying to see if she could help, she just told me to be more careful and cover any pillows I use. Which wasn’t helpful. I feel awful because I’m 19 and should know better but I’ve washed my hair and it ran clear and my hair was dry so I thought it was okay. If anyone has any tips on how to get hair stains off of a handmade pillowcase, I’d love to hear them.

Please don’t reblog