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Anyone can have a split orientation.
It’s not a-spec specific, or a-spec exclusive.
It doesn’t feed into or stem from heteronromativity.
It’s a normal part of how humanity, and presumably other species with similar attraction schema, plays out.
The split attraction model doesn’t sexualize anyone, and you don’t sexualize anyone by using it. It’s a useful tool with its own specific applications, and if it helps you with you’re identity you are well within your rights to use it.
There’s nothing wrong with using the Split Attraction Model to conceptualize and describe your orientation. Orientations can be complicated, and for some people the SAM is the best tool available.
Your orientation is yours to define, however you see fit.
Remember: Whether you use the split-attraction model or not; whether you have two different allo orientations, or one allo and one a-spec, or to different a-spec; whether you use an a-spec orientation to modify your allo orientation, or your allo orientation to modify your a-spec one; your orientation is your own, and no one has any right to dictate how you can or cannot describe or conceptualize it.
All split-attracted LGBT+ people, a-spec or not, are amazing! It can’t be easy having a different romantic orientation from your sexual orientation, but let me tell you: you ROCK it!
Assimilation is death. Don’t be ashamed to be radical. You don’t need to fit into a box, and you don’t need an identity that’s easy for Straight Society to understand. Your uniqueness is strength.
The Split-Attraction Model only “encourages internalized homophobia” to the same degree that the existence of any non-gay identity does. There will be people misidentifying with or without it. You aren’t wrong for using the Split-Attraction Model. The fact that others have identified with a split orientation before settling on a non-split identity does not mean you will or that you must.
You can’t be against the split-attraction model and also against the inclusion of “cishet” aces. Either the split-attraction model doesn’t work and you can’t be het and ace, or you can be het and ace and the split-attraction model is necessary.
No one has a right to redefine ace and aro orientations as something else just because we seem to have split orientations more often. A-spec orientations are orientations, period.
