The Long Journey Home - Chapter 12/12
Scully/Stella - WAIT! GIVE IT A CHANCE! You might like it! Rated: M | Ao3 |
Tags: Mulder is dead (really), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Trauma Recovery, Fluff, Falling in Love. Long fic.
Thank you so much to everyone who has read, commented, given kudos, recommended, and asked after this fic! I’m sorry to see it completed, but I’m so happy to give it a good ending!
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Part 12 - Lovely Endings | ao3
Dana Scully moved to London. She took some of that strength that Stella uncovered inside of her and she followed her gut to chase her love, her friend, her Stella.
There had been commentary inside her head ever since she made the decision. Don’t be an idiot. Don’t make a mistake. This isn’t a fairy tale, you should be alone. You don’t deserve it. But as her history could attest, Scully didn’t back down from her decisions.
She wasn’t stupid. Dana made plans that didn’t include Stella, just in case. She could never sacrifice her independence for anyone, not even someone that prompted her to go to such lengths. She set up a job in a small clinic, a nine-to-five shift she would have balked at ten years prior but that sounded like heaven now.
She takes two weeks once she landed to get her head straight. She familiarizes herself with the clinic and new policies of the new country. She learns the public transport, she sight sees, she unpacks her twenty-five boxes but doesn’t hang up any picture frames. She wonders how to drop in on Stella.
Could she just call her? Her new phone came with a new number Stella wouldn’t recognize. Show up at her work? No, it was too stalkerish and public. Her home? Worse, somehow. She couldn’t escape the worst case scenarios - that Stella wouldn’t want to see her and reject her on the spot. That she’d already found someone new, someone better. That she’d see the drastic move as a sign of craziness and file a restraining order or something.
Dana didn’t spend the majority of her life in a male-dominant career to not recognize gaslighting, even when she was doing it to herself.
So, she kindly told her anxious thoughts to fuck off, and went about a plan. The only way to contact her that wasn’t showing up out of the blue was a phone call, especially since the emails were obviously going unanswered.
Scully refused to entertain the idea that she wasn’t responding because something happened to her. She’d know. Somehow, she’d just know.
She calls, and it goes straight to voicemail. Feeling panicked and unprepared she rambled out a message, hoping that it was enough, that it was full of the right things to say.
Dana ends the call and flops back on her new, too-stiff mattress. Here it goes.
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Stella stood shocked, halfway between her living room and kitchen.
Dana had called her.
When her phone rang earlier that day with an unknown number, she let it ring. She didn’t even know about the voicemail until she got home, and in the time it took to cross her apartment, she realized who was talking and froze. Shock and uncontrollable excitement made her miss most of the message, everything but It’s me, Dana, and I’ve moved here.
That couldn’t be right, Stella rationalized. She shook her head and walked into the kitchen, setting her phone on the island for a minute. Still slightly slack-jawed, she poured a glass of wine mechanically, wondering at what she’d just heard. Dana? Here?
She hadn’t emailed her back in months - by choice. Stella had thought it was the right choice at the time, that there was no other choice.
She’s here?
Stella sat down heavily at the counter and stared at her phone.
No, I didn’t hear that right.
She played the message again and held the phone to her ear, unable to hear her voice echoing over speakerphone. The message felt too private for that.
“Hi, Stella, it’s me, Dana. I just. Well, I’m in town, your town. In London. Actually, well,” she breathed in and out, almost a sigh. “I’ve moved here and I know it’s seems incredibly rash and could come across as creepy but—I didn’t move here for you. Not, not just for you. I moved here for me. A new start, a chance, something I desperately needed. You were right about everything, you know, back in L.A., and in our emails. I can’t just leave us be, not when we have a chance at something, and… I’ve missed you, Stella. So, please, if you’d like, call me back. I’d like to see you soon.”
Stella took a while to process the voicemail, a rush of emotion at hearing Dana’s voice throwing her for a loop. Dana had moved to London for a chance with her. She couldn’t leave their past be - she couldn’t just turn off her emotions and move on. Something in her chest cracked open and Stella let out a sob.
Talk about romance, she thought hysterically. She’d never seen the appeal of the dramatic romantic comedy ending, running through the airport after someone you love, but Christ if a woman didn’t move halfway across the world just to be closer to her.
Wine forgotten, her surroundings forgotten, Stella cried. It wasn’t out of sadness, it was the overwhelming emotions that had crashed against her like running headfirst into a brick wall. It wasn’t a joke, was it? This wasn’t a half-dreamed fantasy or hallucination - Dana was back in her life in a big, big way.
She had another chance at… at happiness. Something about that made her cry harder, it must have been the shock. She wants to meet. Nearly a year to the day that they parted, and Dana was here and she wanted to meet.
No one had ever come back for her before.
Shakily, Stella stood, taking her wine glass and phone to the darkened living room, slowly coming to terms with this development. Once again, Dana Scully turned her world on its side and she could barely make sense of it.
Breathe, Stella. In and out. This is real.
The ball was in her court. Stella held the power to put into motion whatever would happen next. Part of her wanted Dana in her home, immediately, never to leave again, but she knew that it would be a mistake to jump in so quickly without discussion.
They should meet publicly, someplace quiet but neutral. It was Friday night - they could do something tomorrow. God, the thought of it was crazy. Just an hour ago, Stella was convinced that she’d never see or speak to Dana again - that the one good thing to happen to her in years was firmly in the past. And here she was.
She took some time to compose herself. Then a little more time, and before she could talk herself out of it she called Dana back and heard her voice for the first time in almost a year.
-
London at Christmastime was a beautiful thing to see. Cold and windy, which Dana had delt with plenty, but the city looked warm and alive with the holiday lights fashioned on seemingly every building. She appreciated the people, too. it was an unbelievably busy city, but Londoners kept their head down and went about their day in their own world.
She’d also never felt so safe in a city before, but maybe that had more to do with her future than the relative safety of the streets near her apartment and clinic.
Stella had called her back. That was the important thing - the first step to whatever her new path may lead to. Friendship? She hoped so. More? She dreamed so. The only unbearable thing would be to be so close with no connection at all, but their new plans to meet had all but stopped her worries.
The coffee shop was plain, disguising a lack of funds for minimalism, but it was still comfortable and warm. Dana got there early, of course, and secured a chai latte and a seat in the window so she could watch for Stella.
Ten minutes passed and Dana was slowly getting more nervous as their meeting time grew close. She nearly jumped at every blonde to walk by, at every customer entering the coffee shop, until she saw her. Oh, Stella.
Dana was out of her seat before Stella was fully inside. They made eye contact and a frisson of excitement ran through her. Stella approached and she held out her arms slightly on instinct, a need to touch, and suddenly she was hugging her and things felt right again.
“Dana,” Stella breathed, tightening her grip.
Dana hugged back, prolonging the contact just a little longer, a little longer still, until it was odd how long they were standing and hugging in public. She broke the contact and sat, smoothing her jacket down, her eyes darting all over Stella’s form.
She was gorgeous. Her hair had grown longer and curlier in the year they had been apart and it was flattering. Dana recognized the silk shirt she had on as one from Los Angeles, a visual connection that tethered them now to her memory of the past even more strongly.
A waiter took Stella’s coffee order in the time she’d been silently looking. She met her eyes and smiled, and Stella smiled back, and wasn’t that just a beautiful sight.
“I hardly know what to say,” Stella nearly breathed and oh how Dana had missed the sound of her voice. “I’m sorry for not keeping in touch, for one. It’s my fault.”
Dana shook her head. “I’m just as much at fault - if anything, the blame belongs to our situation. It’s hardly easy to maintain any kind of relationship when we’re busy with work and so far apart and - you know.”
Stella smiled, thanking the waiter when he brought her coffee over, taking a minute to sip at her drink and gather her thoughts. Dana couldn’t stop staring. She was finally here - finally in front of her again. She waited for whatever question Stella had about her moving here, about anything. Nothing but the absolute truth would come out - she had made that promise to herself on the way over here.
“Dana…” she trailed off, smiling almost nervously and fiddling with her coffee mug. “You actually - you’ve moved here.” Stella let out a little laugh and shook her head, not quite knowing what to say.
“You must think I’m insane.” “I don’t,” Stella replied quickly. “I really don’t. I just… I need to know why, is all.”
Dana took in a steadying breath, knowing that what she said would determine how this would play out.
“I know this is crazy, just moving here. But I had to follow my gut. There were two choices really - stay in D.C., do my job, and go home every night thinking about you. I tried that, I tried to forget you, I tried to think about anything else. But I couldn’t move on. It made sense in the beginning, but not this long, Stella. This long is something real, something permanent. I knew staying away from you would be impossible.” Dana reached out her hand and put it over Stella’s and the contact was electric. Stella smiled shakily, not wanting to cry but feeling her eyes burn anyway as Dana continued.
“The second choice,” she smiled back, trembling in front of her, “was to take a chance. I can’t look back, but I can look forward and the only future I can imagine where I’m happy is a one with you in it. So I made some calls, got a job, and moved here.
“Home… I thought home was D.C., but it was just where my past was held. I couldn’t keep living in the past like that. And then I realized that home was where you were, and D.C., Los Angeles - they were just part of the long journey to you.” Dana took a breath, both of them needing the break, unable to look away from each other’s faces.
“And how, exactly,” started Stella, “how did you see me in this future of yours?”
Dana laughed a laugh that bubbled out of her, full of the same nervous excitement that Stella felt.
“I see you as a friend, a confidant, someone I can talk to and who I know will listen,” Dana said. “In my dreams, I see us living together and arguing about who’s turn it was to do the dishes or walk the dog that we adopt. I see you as a part of my every day, and I see myself as a part of yours.” A tear escaped down Dana’s cheek, running into her smile. “Oh, Stella. I see you as my love, my partner. If you’ll have me, that is.”
Stella stood from their tiny table, still clutching Dana’s hand in hers, and pulled her up as well. “I want nothing more than all of the above.”
She couldn’t stand it any longer. Stella took the final step toward Dana and kissed her, her hand cradling Dana’s head as she searched her mouth, feeling her own smile match Dana’s as they couldn’t control themselves.
Distantly, she was aware that the patrons of the coffee shop were clapping as if they’d just gotten engaged, and it was practically what had happened.
Dana broke away and Stella was thankful because she wasn’t sure she could’ve stopped any time soon.
“How about a date to start, yeah?” she asked. “Know any good cupcake places around here?”
