Weird gross subdrop from a boundary conversation morphing into a belittling and dismissal sesh. Told I was being silly, a child, argumentative. All because I didn't want to endlessly expose myself to a dude too scared to even show up fully or build a spit of trust? And I tried to keep the vetting going, tried to keep the reins on since he refused anything but push push push, tried to keep communicating even while staying subby and vulnerable when things felt safe enough to lean in a bit.
Is the onus solely on the damn sub since they suffer the consequences more heavily if things go south? Are some kink dudes really so caught up in needing to feel important and desired that they can't show up like self-respecting adults? I refuse to believe it's the majority but I'm simultaneously very repulsed and unsettled at the pattern.
Feels practically impossible some days to stay kinky. I'd just like to be able to drown in my exploration without constantly needing to watch my back because an over-enthusiastic "dom" can't control himself or honor safety, communication, and what building a dynamic needs. Yuck.
