how much would it suck to be that kid at the start of Jurassic Park?
you're on a boring, educational vacation and some random adult decides to give you a fun new recurring nightmare about getting your stomach ripped open, but at least you have the consolation that the animal in your new nightmare is extinct. surely that'll help you recover after waking up in a cold sweat
and then like a week later it's on the news that not only has this animal been brought back from the dead, but it and all its friends have escaped containment and gotten a taste for human flesh
why did the Signs aliens come to a planet that's mostly water when water kills them?
I don't know, why did they hurl themselves into the unforgiving emptiness of space when exposure to it would likely kill them? why do humans go into space or out into the endless sea or crawl into narrow passages beneath the earth? why do we go into mines or factories that expose us to things that will, we know, slowly (or quickly) kill us? maybe the aliens were laborers getting minimal pay for maximum risk. maybe the story isn't about them and any method of defeating the threat would've gotten the same low effort critique
I'm just saying if Jenny had lived and Xander had gotten to see two adults in a healthy, committed relationship with ups and downs and fights and good times and bad, maybe he would have realized that being a good or bad husband isn't something predetermined by character, it's about the work you put in. And Xander has always been ready to put in the work where it counted so he would've been ready to rock this husband thing and never would've left Anya at the altar
when I'm cooking, I can hear my dad watching TV. lately he's been watching Castle, which I have never seen but I figured it out based on it clearly being a crime show and the main character being Castle. when I first started hearing it, I figured it must be a sweeps or finale-type episode because it sounded a lot more intense than I would've thought a show like Castle would be and I was confused when this tenor went on for a couple days
then I realized
they're not talking about loveable crime writer Rick Castle. they're talking about brooding antihero Frank Castle aka The Punisher
Nog just took a bowl of popcorn from Vic as if he was going to eat it. But Vic is a hologram. They're inside the holodeck. Did Nog just forget? Did Vic have real popcorn? Is all the food in the holodeck real just in case? Isn't that an incredible waste of power to replicate all the time? Where does it go when the holograms eat it? Where does it go when the program ends?
I’ve decided to reread Harry Potter for the first time in a decade for Halloween (because reasons I guess) and here are my thoughts/observations as of finishing CoS.
I continue to hate Dumbledore. I’m definitely seeing him as more fleshed out, but that doesn’t make him better. Like, he’s really good with the kids, he clearly still understands what it’s like to be young and sympathizes with them in ways adults tend not to, it’s easy to see why Harry hero worships him. But that’s just the problem because understanding the kids also means he’s better at manipulating them.
It’s even addressed! Someone brings up that it almost seems like Dumbledore arranged everything in PS so Harry would face Voldemort and Harry, being an eleven year-old, defends him by saying that Dumbledore just knew he needed the chance to face him. Which makes sense because he’s ELEVEN, but anyone with critical thinking skills should be like “ummmmm...” So yeah. I still hate Dumbledore.
And guys it’s so obvious he was always gay! He wears a flower bonnet at Christmas! It’s S U B T E X T
The centaurs so clearly already know Harry’s gonna die and the first time it reads like they know he’s in danger or like he circumvents fate but NO it’s the future-future and my HEART
I never appreciated before how witty Snape is. His protection for the stone is a riddle and his final for the first years is to brew a forgetfulness potion from memory. And when Ginny’s taken to the Chamber, he’s the one who steps in and gets Lockhart out of the way. And he’s a jerk to the kids but we also see him being at least decent to his coworkers. If he could’ve just gotten over Lily, he could’ve had his own child to send to Hogwarts to torment Harry instead of having to work through Draco (who, frankly, is a little shit. I still love him but man does he make it rough).
The Improper Use of Magic office sends Harry a reminder that Muggles shouldn’t be exposed to magic via an owl that drops the letter on a Muggle’s head. Nice.
Dumbledore says in PS that he’s leaving Harry with the Dursleys in part because it will be better for his development; he won’t grow up knowing he’s this famous figure and get a big head or something. (Obviously this is a complete lie, there’s plenty of meta out there about this being not only because of the Lily’s blood thing but also because it’s a great way for Dumbledore to make himself a heroic figure in Harry’s life; regardless I’m still gonna tear it apart.) Except that Harry winds up with no idea how to handle his own fame. If he’d grown up knowing about it, he could’ve developed mechanisms to deal with awkward moments and people taking him off guard and all that uncomfortable stuff we see him struggling over throughout the books.
In CoS we see the teachers suddenly giving out points like Mardi Gras beads. In PS the kids had to do something exceptional to earn points but now they’re getting them just for throwing out answers in class. Which makes me think the teachers, after six years of Slytherin wins, were being stingy with the points to try to hold them back from a seventh year win.
Am I still bitter the House Cup was stolen from them in PS? A little less tbh. There’s an argument to be made Harry and co earned those points (even if it’s obnoxiously obvious that Dumbledore gave them just enough to put them over) but should they have been awarded at the feast already being held in Slytherin’s honor? This wasn’t like CoS where the feast was an impromptu thing immediately after the climactic battle. There was plenty of time in between to dole out those points without embarrassing Slytherin.
After spending a year blindly buying into Lockhart’s bullshit, Hermione will go on to out Lupin as a werewolf. I know Snape basically fed her all the info, but I really think the shame of being so utterly wrong about Lockhart (especially when the boys were right) really stuck with her.
Listen, I am trying to like Dobby here, he’s enduring terrible punishments and risking worse just to protect this child he’s never met, but his speech pattern is sooo much like Gollum’s and that is not helping.
Speaking of, based on everything that happens there’s no reason to assume Dobby doesn’t see Petunia take a swing at Harry with a frying pan and he still goes through with his “stay with the Dursleys” plan. Because that wouldn’t kill him.
Back in PS, after sending Norbert off to Charlie, Harry and Hermione are caught coming down from the Astronomy Tower by McGonagall. (Ron is absent because he was bitten by Norbert and needed medical treatment to avoid losing his hand.) In CoS, when Hermione’s petrified and McGonagall is taking Harry aside to tell him, Ron is almost an afterthought, only being brought along because he shows up. I’m just saying, McGonagall thought Harry and Hermione were making out on the Astronomy Tower and that they’re an adorable tween couple.
Tom: “You think I was going to use my filthy Muggle father’s name forever?” But... But it’s there, Tom. It’s right there. In your new name. ‘Cause you made it out of the letters of your old name. You’re still carrying him around, Tom.
As I’m reading I’m mentally comparing these to what I remember of the films (I haven’t watched them since even before my last reread so I don’t remember much) and imagining a more faithful netflix series version. The only thing so far that I’d want changed from the way it plays out in the books is the Percy/Penelope revelation. He should’ve gotten a big reunion with her at the feast.
I really just need to share this absolutely atrocious Pride and Prejudice cover with someone because I feel like, despite the tagline, whoever put this together has never actually read or even heard of P&P. Possibly not Jane Austen either.
