#tbelle

[tricksterbelle]

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IN_yEnmZA2g)

[justmoosingaround]

Yesterday I didn't run, but I took Tbelle on a 2 mile walk, and then little boy Neko got to go for a mile. He was so good. He's getting the hang of walking in a leash. In 2 weeks I'm getting ms. Harleygirl her gentle leader so she can go for walks, too. And probably a ridiculous pink leash, cause Mr. King hates it when people call her a "him" and he requested pink stuff. She'll look so fab. But today I'm home sick. My belly hurt soooo bad and I was busy busy busy at work. Mr. King took it upon himself to chat up our boss and I got sent home. But tbelle has been pretty much on top of me since I got home and it makes everything a little better 😊

[tricksterbelle]

New video on things I learned from this past Vidcon

[forevrdreamingofbetterthings]

Can you do an ice bath? Might help refocus the pain and help with the firey feelings and inflammation?

Ice bath?!?!? Oh dear... that sounds terrible i’m not gonna lie lol. I don’t even think I have enough ice for that, unless i work on it all day and have one tonight? Have you ever done this? 

[forevrdreamingofbetterthings]

I know that he's going through a lot, too. I get that. But that's not an excuse for not considering your needs or your triggers. This absolutely seems like a yellow flag to me. So what if he forgets? It's not funny, love. He needs to remember. Maybe he needs to buy safe foods for now until your money comes in and you can contribute to the grocery budget and trying new things. You shouldn't feel guilty for being you and needing the things you need. He absolutely shouldn't feed that guilt.

I know he shouldn’t, i’m not really excusing it bc it’s really shitty for me. But “safe foods” is a really difficult notion atm. There aren’t really much that’s safe for me that we know of. 

The other thing is that I haven’t told him about the trigger so I need to tell him how it’s affecting me. I told him I don’t like it and that chips are all i have, but i think he's worried about enabling me to hurt myself by not eating a variety of healthy foods. 

It’s really complicated and shitty, but over all things are really great with Matt and I. He’s really wonderful and treats me super well. No one’s perfect tho so this is something we need to work on. :)

[forevrdreamingofbetterthings]

Maybe he could buy extra chips?

He does... LOL 

And he eats them too. But he forgets or something, i dunno. 

It just reminds me of when i was a kid and my parents would be upset with me if i finished something in the house, like cookies or chips or something. I always felt so guilty for eating stuff bc they always made me feel like i should put as little into my body as possible or i was a failure. 

So this is really REALLY playing into some of my childhood-teenage struggles with family and food. I keep getting flashbacks and i feel like i can’t eat anything. 

So i think part of why this is such a big deal for me is bc it’s highly triggering for me from my past. My family has always treated me like i was too fat and should eat way less and take up way less space. So being chastised for finishing the chips all the time is killing me, especially when it’s one of the only things i feel safe eating. 

Still, i totally get where he’s coming from and I feel badly for his position. It’s not easy for him either and i know he’s really doing his best :(

[justmoosingaround01]

Heck dang, I ran for the first time in forever tonight. My time was real shitty and it was only a mile and half but my dog is so happy! She loves her runs and I've been slacking!

[forevrdreamingofbetterthings]

Hey FYI on your caption of the two women saying "white as a toilet," Nicole Ritchie isn't white. You might want to change the caption to redact "two white women." Just a thought.

Who’s nicole ritchie? I’m guessing the main girl in the gif? Thanks for the tip bc I had no idea who she was but she looked white to me :\