#teddypurebite

[stillheresanctuary]

I adopted a Pure Bite, Teddy, a few months ago. Things were mostly great, after a few wounds I discovered the muzzle is needed to protect him and me, but something strange is happening lately. His mental capacity is that of a toddler, but he has begun displaying sexual interest toward me and attempting sex acts. It’s clear he cannot consent, but he becomes very angry and violent when I say no. I’m worried he won’t stop one day, and I think he needs a different home and possibly medical help.

If I remember correctly, most of the bitties originally created by @boe-someone go through a heat cycle, Bites included.

I fully understand being uncomfortable with the situation, especially since the little fellow is a rescue and you probably weren’t in anyway prepared for such an occurrence. Heat cycles aren’t pleasant for any party involved, making the bitties affected irrational and more aggressive than normal for them and often unsettling the caretaker. There’s a good number of ways to alleviate a heat cycle, primarily with containment and providing suitable toys for relief. You can also purchase a number of mild suppressants that work to both calm the bitty and soothe the frustration caused by a heat cycle.

The main reason why I’m offering these suggestions rather than immediately offering to bring your Teddy to the Sanctuary is that you mentioned things had been great between you two up until this point. You express open concern for his well being, specifically referring to consent, and that says to me that you care quite a lot for this bitty, to the point that you are willing to ask for help and ultimately give him up if you feel you cannot care for him the way he needs. I think you’ll find the both of you much happier in the long run if you allow yourself to give Teddy a chance and simply plan ahead for these uncomfortable times.

I’ll talk to Halim and see what we can put together for you, we have a couple spare large sized kennels and cooling blankets we can provide alongside some of those suppressants I mentioned. For a bitty as large as a Pure Bite, it’ll be easier to add a couple teaspoons of powder to his food or water that attempt a gel or pills, but it will take longer to activate, usually around 45 minutes. He’ll be a bit lethargic and maybe a little dazed, but that’s to be expected with him already being in the throes of a cycle. 

[stillheresanctuary]

I really appreciate your help with this situation. For everyone’s good, I think after this heat is over, he should go live at the sanctuary. I just don’t know that I’ll be able to feel the same warmth I did toward him without showing him my fear and anxiety, and that’s not going to make him or me happy. I’m grieved that this happened as I was getting very attached. I just can’t hear him call me “mama” again after having heard it... in this context.

It’s quite alright, I’m glad you felt comfortable reaching out to me and mine for help. I know there’s folks out there that are too nervous or proud to reach out for help, even when it can cause greater damage in the long run.

I am sorry that you had to go through this, I know how hard it is to realize that someone you care about no longer or never was compatible with you in the way you might have hoped. It’s especially true with the more child-like bitties, with their simple needs and tendency to be quite affectionate and even clingy.

Do know that you’re welcome to visit any time you like, and don’t let this experience spook you away from future rescues or adoption. You’ve got a big heart full of caring and love, and somewhere out there is a companion who will happily accept your love and return it in spades with the support and acceptance you deserve.

Teddy has been added to Residents.

[stillheresanctuary]

how is teddy? oWo

Teddy is... Okay.

Being separated from his original caretaker was stressful for all parties involved, and we had to isolate him away from the rest of the Residents until his heat cycle had properly run its course. Halim and I have been doing research into supplements that would soothe and possibly suppress future heat cycles, which is honesty not something I’m entirely comfortable doing since heat cycles are an unfortunate but natural occurrence for certain bitty types. But Teddy’s cycle was...

Intense.

Yandere lines bitties do have a tendency to more frequent and intense cycles, but Teddy was not only under duress from the physical stress but the emotional stress of rejection as well as separation from his chosen human. He actually became quite violent at one point, and he lashed out at both Halim and myself. It was sheer luck that had Key showing up, as he managed to contain Teddy before he could really hurt anyone.

With all of that together with his less than mature mental state, Halim and I agreed that maintaining a continuous mild suppressant would be safer and healthier for Teddy at this time. It’s something I’m personally not all that happy about, I’m not a fan of medicines that alter the mental state, but in this case it’s necessary for Teddy to have a better quality of life.

[stillheresanctuary]

Teddy’s person here... Is it safe for him to be on suppressants for every heat? His heats in particular appear to be often, and I’m worried about negative effects. I’m also sex-repulsed myself, so I’m really at a loss if he has to continue to have heats. I got him as a rescue, and I was not informed about this issue or I might have made a different choice. I’m very afraid of him after seeing his heat behavior and not sure if I can go on as before.

/2 If the suppressants don’t take away the heats completely, I don’t think I can keep caring for Teddy. I want to throw up or faint or both when he starts displaying the sexual behavior, and I just don’t think I’m prepared to deal with that forever. I have trouble seeing him the same way as before this started. He’s not my sweet little friend anymore, he’s… Lascivious, and scary. I know that’s in there under his normal personality.

- - -

Ah, that does complicate things.

First things first, the suppressants are only used before or during a heat and are similar to taking herbal supplements in humans. They won’t hurt him and it’s practically impossible to overdose as his metabolism will filter it out faster than it can build up. Probably the best comparison would be someone smoking marijuana for pain management, it’s pretty much entirely harmless unless allergies become involved. So, no, it won’t completely remove the heats, but it will reduce them significantly in both longevity and intensity.

As for being sex repulsed, I’m sorry that you’ve had to confront this so strongly. I have a very good friend who is also sex repulsed and I completely understand how scary and unsettling being confronted with sexual situations can be, I’ve talked them down from a number of panic attacks and it never gets easier.

For the safety of Teddy and for your own well being, it’ll be safest to have Teddy ride out the rest of his heat cycle with you in a safe, familiar space, but I’m going to ask Code to stay with you until this rides out. He’s been trained like all the rest of my boys, and as an Error bitty, he’s perfectly suited to properly containing a wayward bitty no matter the size thanks to his string magic. He’s also a precocious little sh*tlord that will do everything in his power to help distract you from what’s making you uncomfortable, much like he does with myself when I have an anxiety attack.

Once the heat cycle is finished, which shouldn’t take more than 3-5 days if my research is correct, Code will contact me and we’ll get to work figuring out a good way to safely transfer Teddy if you still feel the uncomfortable with the situation. It’s going to be a rather delicate process, since Pure Bites tend to bond very strongly with a single person and can become very ill or depressed when separated, as they’re a derivative off the Brassberry type, but the last thing I want to do is force you into a situation where you feel ill and unsafe.

[stillheresanctuary]

Teddy

Headcanon A:  realistic

Because of Teddy's typing, combined with the circumstances of his arrival and his mental maturity, the little guy has to have a daily suppressant to maintain a good quality of life. We use a precisely brewed blue lotus tea for a gentler suppressant experience that doesn't alter his mental state as much as a stronger medication would. He gets a chocolate covered piece of fruit with his morning tea, and will throw a massive fit if his "morning treat" is late.

Headcanon B: while it may not be realistic it is hilarious

Despite his name, Teddy is actually quite scared of bears. Plush versions are okay, and he has a teddy bear onesie he particularly loves to wear, but real bears are terrifying to him.

Headcanon C: heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

As a PureBite, Teddy will never actually "grow up". Despite everything he has gone through, even if he was able to overcome the mental hurdles, his design keeps him frozen in the physical state of a young child. No matter how smart, experienced, or understanding he may eventually become, he will always be a child.

Headcanon D: unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

Teddy is working hard to learn how to resist the natural biting urges of his type, and while he still wears one of his many custom muzzles as day to day protection, he can be trusted to eat only his food at the dinner table and not bite through utensils like he did when he first arrived. He also has a teething toy that he uses when he plays by himself, and while the toy doesn't usually survive long, it has helped immensely in letting Teddy spend time outside his personal space without his muzzle on.