✨️A-Jiu things I can't stop thinking about✨️
Writing "Temporary Misalignment" was draining. In a way, that I did not expect it to be.
Shen Jiu crawled under my skin, tore my heart out, burned it to ashes, and gave it back with the sweetest smile he was able to give like
"Here you go, jiejie, I got it for you"
And even if it hurt I couldn’t help but thank him for the gift.
Because Shen Jiu? Is a creature of love, one so fierce he's overflowing with it in comparison to any character I have ever written.
He loves fiercely, but not flexibly. To love means to prevent loss.
Love is an obssession, but I call it protection.
Love is possession, but I will frame it as devotion.
In that sense, A-Jiu is a mirror, a fractured one, of his environment.
For him, there is no good or evil, it's only what is mine and what is a threat.
And I don’t even know why but... I saw this boy's life through his childhood, teenage years, and into adulthood. There was no possibility of me not loving his character.
If you know someone so deeply you feel as if you carried his ghost on a shoulder, whispering his story into your ear for you to write, filling your heart with cloyingly sweet poison - how could you not feel for him?