Gifts
A friend of mine recently shared this story with me:
My friend Rodrigo recently met his parents for a day at the museum and then dinner afterward. They got to talking in the car on the way to dinner and his mom said that she could live in the city if she didn't have to drive (meaning if LA had viable public transportation). Her son, my friend Rodrigo, chimed in and said... I could totally drive here. The traffic wouldn't bother me. And then his mom told him... you could never drive here. You're temper is too bad and you couldn't handle it.
When Rodrigo told me this story the next day at lunch he had an epiphany. He realized that he could totally drive in the city and keep his cool. And he realized that his mothers declaration of his abilities references her knowledge of him when he is with her, and not what he is like when he is not around her (she drives him crazy with her opinions and judgmental advances). My friend, who is in the process of discovering his adult path, quickly realized that he had been accepting the words of his mother as they relate to her vision of him for many years... In fact his whole life until recently. The lightbulb went on in this conversation and he learned that he in fact could drive in the city and that his mother was WRONG about her son (Rodrigo is often agitated and bad tempered when he is around his mother because of the reasons above). And then, he realized that he did not have to accept her words as truth any longer.
Today, my motivational moment is about gifts... and being careful which you choose to receive. I like to think of the opinions and advice that others dole out as "gifts". And like the gifts we receive at birthdays and holidays, we do not always like or have to like what we get. My friend Rodrigo, who has been accepting all the gifts his mother has given him for much of his adulthood, recently learned a very important lesson. Not all gifts are valuable, true, or worth holding on to.
I tell my students this all the time... we have two hands with which to hold and carry things... so be wise and careful about what you grab onto and take with you.
Peace and love bitches.
Tnasty