Like yeah I came back to Naruto after like almost a decade not engaging with it with fresh eyes actually wondering and hoping if my opinion on my NOTP of all time would change at all and it did not! But after reading through The Discourse I think I have the big understanding why.
A lot of SasuSaku discourse bothers me because there's a lot of cognitive dissonance in it. People have a lot of varying subjective opinions about the characters and ships in Naruto and often times base their opinions on ships and characters through that biased lens--I will not claim to be unbiased, but I do have my own reads and I think arguments from Anti SasuSaku people who like Sasuke but hate Sakura and who like Sakura but hate Sasuke are very different but neither can seem to grasp the root of both problems is misogyny. The problem with SasuSaku is misogyny.
So, from the perspective of a Sasuke fan: Sakura is incredibly shallow, obsessed with Sasuke for never any good reasons we're presented with (just that he was the academy heartthrob everyone was into because he was Mr. Cool Genius and then Kakashi actually later responds to Sasuke's "she has no reason to love me" with "you don't need a reason to love someone" which ... may be true in real life but doesn't quite hit here), never actually tries to understand the trauma that makes Sasuke a nuanced, complicated character and then winds up married to him is really jarring--especially when we've just read a 699 chapter story about someone who DOES understand that trauma going out of his way to try and appeal to Sasuke's humanity. And, like, yes--the point is supposed to be that Sasuke is so far gone and is continually isolating himself and marinading in his own self-loathing that appeals to his humanity aren't reaching him until Naruto literally and metaphorically beats it into him and after Naruto gets through to him, Sasuke is at a point where he can practice self-acceptance and allow himself to actually feel love again. However, it really does not land when Sakura's appeals to him always come across as selfish and focused more on begging him to reciprocate her feelings than actually trying to understand him and his motives.
and using this scene as an example is funny because she says the line about how "revenge won't make you happy" and then as he continues to push her away she doesn't even stick to her guns--she just begs, and pivots to saying she'll do whatever she can to get him to stay
and like, again--the intention of this scene is supposed to be that Sasuke is pushing her away and self isolating as a form of self harm and a sign of his own hatred, but it doesn't read that way because Sakura's argument isn't consistent and it's begging him to stay for her own sake. It doesn't work because she doesn't have any moral consistency here. The intention is supposed to be that she's empathizing with him by comparing his isolation and loneliness to her attachment to him but again that ... doesn't work lol
Which is why when she's trying to deceive him to kill him here it's very believable!
And the problem with this is, there were two other female characters who could have filled this role. You just as easily could have put Ino as Sasuke's teammate or Karin as the person whose feelings he decides to reciprocate here and thematically nothing changes. You could put Naruto there and nothing changes about the intention of the arc just being that Sasuke stops pushing people away.
Sakura also never like, apologizes for this. Or actually has a conversation with Sasuke that shows she's learned to empathize with him or people like him other than "I'll be nice to Naruto I guess" afterwards.
Sakura's feelings for Sasuke and her seeming inability to empathize with him and the fact nothing thematically changes if you replace Sakura with another character, however, is because Sakura was written by a man who doesn't know how to write women. The reason it doesn't work from Sasuke's perspective, despite the intention, is because of misogyny. The reason SasuNaru retains its popularity is because there's still a better case for it in the place that Naruto occupies in Sasuke's character arc.
(I'm not even a SasuNaru/NaruSasu girlie but genuine question; what is the heterosexual explaination for this cover lmao)
Then there's the flip side; from the perspective of a Sakura fan. Sakura's obsession with Sasuke in the early series is almost played off as a comedy bit but it's also often acknowledged as a bad or detrimental thing to her character.
Combined with Kishimoto's weird statement of Sakura and Rock Lee representing "human weekness" it only seems befitting that Sakura's character arc involves moving past Sasuke. There's even a thematic setup for it in the Forest of Death
And since I do often see Sakura fans insisting that Ino and Sakura's friendship didn't end over the mutual crush on Sasuke
yes, they did lol; that Sakura didn't want to be in her shadow was added later on--but the immediate first answer we're given as to the reason they are rivals and no longer friends is because they both liked Sasuke. The idea that they both cut their hair and start to reconcile their friendship makes for a much more satisfying and interesting character arc if it also means leaving their attachment to the validation from Sasuke behind.
Also speaking of Rock Lee, and the Forest of Death--that's also another fantastic setup for character growth from Sakura that was then later squandered.
Rock Lee is introduced to us as a character who likes Sakura and she's repulsed by this because he's not conventionally attractive
Rock Lee then goes on to be the first person to step in to save Sakura from the Sound ninjas that are attacking her and an unconscious Sasuke and Naruto--and when he fails and she's left defending them on her own, she uses Lee as inspiration and later reprimands Naruto from trash-talking him and attributes him to the breakthrough she has in her own resolve and strength
Sakura then goes as out of her way to visit Lee in the hospital while his leg is injured after the Gaara fight (and she brings him flowers!) as she goes out of her way to visit Sasuke every day while he's stuck in Itachi's Tsukuyomi. To be clear, I am not necessarily making a ship argument here--I am not arguing for LeeSaku over SasuSaku--but what I am pointing out is that this is good character growth for Sakura. Putting her childhood feelings behind her in order to grow stronger for the sake of her unit is a much more compelling character arc, especially when those feelings DID make her look shallow and DID end an entire friendship with the first person who actually stood up for her.
but instead we get this:
this is the end of the manga and she is STILL making selfish appeals to him to her own detriment and even acknowledging that it makes her look pathetic.
This is really not the thing I envision for a strong, female lead, and if the goal is to have your female lead be both a (physically) strong female lead and still give them an emotional core, having them revolve around a man who you straight up lampshade makes you this pathetic is maybe not the way to go! because this is, again, a character full of misogyny.
The entire problem lies within the fact that Sakura is a better character without Sasuke. Her obsession with Sasuke is a character flaw, it is not an endearing one, and it holds her back dramatically as a character. It tanks all of her potential--she revolves around am an who talks to her like this
and even if this can be read as a display of Sasuke's self-destructive, self-isolating, self-loathing behavior--it does not work in the same way that his relationship with Naruto does because he is constantly, verbally rejecting her--which is clearly something that she takes to heart to her own detriment.
It also hurts the portrayal of all the characters it touches. Naruto stepping aside and giving them room because he likes and respects Sakura enough to recognize she cares a lot Sasuke and then Kakashi going from acknowledging that she taking Sasuke at face value to Naruto's detriment and then turning around and justifying those same feelings makes the narrative look like it's vindicating Sakura's self-destructive behaviors and Kakashi look like a hypocrite.
On top of that, Sakura just isn't herself around him? She's shy and submissive while she's bold and brash around people like Ino and Naruto. That's the side of Sakura that I like the most--the emotional, punchy, fiery female lead that just becomes shy and submissive around the guy she likes despite the fact that he talks to her like THAT just kills it. A far better romance arc for Sakura would have been with someone who really brings out the more vibrant parts of her personality--like Naruto or Ino--because even the light novels that make the attempt to redeem the fan perspective of SasuSaku just still make Sakura look pathetic and over-attached even towards the man she's married to. She's disappointed by his very rare signs of affection, she's clearly disappointed by how often he's away from home. A far better romance arc for Sakura would have been with Rock Lee or Gaara whom she would have been forced to challenge her world views over.
I'm well aware of what the intention with this arc was, but it really doesn't work for either character. It doesn't work for Sasuke because it essentially means that any character could have filled that role, and it doesn't work for Sakura because it means she never grows or has her worldview challenged.
and the reason its written like that is misogyny! thanks for coming to my ted talk.
