Discover Top Posts Tagged with #that's... not good

a lot of people are seeming to struggle with the fact that ultimately iwtv is an adaption of a work by anne rice... and there's no level of transformation that can ultimately free it from being exactly that

i sense a lot of frustration incoming for people who have not familiarized themselves with her rights and her many, many wrongs

#see i went in knowing exactly what flaws were coming our way #and made peace with it... a while ago #seeing some comments on twitter #and it's like #oh i think you came in blind #that's... not good #i say this as someone who is also fairly blind but also Very Aware

idk how to categorise 13′s mental state after that episode, to be honest? On one hand, the 19 years apart and in solitary confinement apparently made her want physical contact And emotional contact. That’s not strange or odd, i’d class myself as the same brand of touch averse to 13 and after 10 months of limited to no human contact I want to hug people and have deep conversations, something else i’m not generally much of a fan of.

Like, the sudden urge for closeness both emotional and physical, or just the acceptance of it when there was none before, isn’t weird as much as an understandable affect of her circumstances. I feel like a lot of us could get that at the moment.

It’s the Anger part i don’t know how to classify. On one hand, due to her prison stay she seems willing to make use of a shoulder to lean on (her avoidance of the topic with ryan, to start with imo, was more a sign on emotional immaturity than avoidance. I don’t think she really necessarily got that it Did matter... Luckily Ryan has emotional intelligence in spades now and walked her through a few steps of healthy ways to deal with things), and i mean, you always miss what you can’t have so in hindsight i’m not actually surprised she was willing to be more open in this episode (she may not have explained the back story to Jack, but she Also spoke honestly to him at times). There’s nothing like having nobody to talk to that will make you want to talk.

So you have a 13 who Isn’t by default necessarily going to instantly repress anything she deems a negative emotion. Because 13′s be kind and happy thing led her to only want to express those types of emotions and had her anger boiling over. Even in s11, where she had control of When she let her anger run free she was still using bad guys as some kind of emotional pressure valve release. The only difference in s12 was she’d lost control of it all.

So, there’s a Chance she might actually get on a little better on this front from now on. Maybe. She’s less likely to explode if she lets off steam every now and again. But... Will she do that with Yaz? That’s not really the relationship they Have. It’s up in the air, their relationship is in the middle of a big adjustment and will evolve accordingly even further than it already has. We have to wait and see.

But then there’s the other angle. All these times before we’ve seen 13′s viciously grinning glee and terrifying stillness because of her anger. And it was scary and threatening. But what we got in the special was something entirely different. Her ‘i am the doctor’ speech in Osaka was... Terrifying.

I don’t use that word lightly, but she looks Genuinely scary here.

Not just that specific moment, that whole scene as she’s crouched down over Leo’s body out of sight of the fam. That stare is 1000 yards. It’s Empty. This is her having no identity to claim for herself and reaching for what she finds.

Unfortunately, what she found was a self definition of actual violence. She defined herself over her ability to kill Daleks. I wouldn’t even say she was particularly angry here, she obviously is but we’ve seen her worse, this is her... Lost? She’s in a place where the only identity she can claw out for herself involves violence. And that’s Empty.

I feel like 13 could easily go down a fairly merciless path here. I feel like Yaz’s brash and open judgemental characteristics would benefit 13 in this case, a Lot. She’s lost and needs guidance. She needs to define herself around something other than her ability to cause harm otherwise this will be a dark path, very fast. There’s no forgiveness, here.

So will her newfound ability to discuss her feelings aid her in controlling her anger and the actions that stem from that fury, or will that new ability not Matter if the bad things she does are no longer even motivated by anger but rather a loss of identity?

She’s going to have to learn herself again, to build herself up from scratch with new foundations at the bottom. She just needs to be very careful how she chooses to define herself because so far? I don’t think she’s doing great.