Potter cut the chase. We all know it's you. Or well. Don't. If that's what you wanna keep pretending about. Suit yourself.
What I want to know is when are you getting rid of our current headache. We all know you were behind the disappearance of our previous *redacted*
Is there any way to...speed up the process? I am willing to fund this joke of yours if you do.
-Sincerely
Someone raving to fucking Study
Hermione, I thought we talked about thi-
Dear anonymous possibly friend-shaped study book
As always it is with some confusion and an intense shudder of disgust that I must ask how you arrived at the far-fetched conclusion that anyone working on this proud publication could in any shape or form collude with The Enemy?
This reporter assures you that they have never been nor do they plan to become that loudmouth with a well-documented death wish.
Nor do we unfortunately have any idea what Dark Service you are alluding to.
Some things should not be rushed. However, this definitely isn’t one of them so if you are willing to invest in a monthly Honeydukes order, I am more than willing to reach out to an unnamed contact to… optimize the timeline if you will.
Maliciously yours
Hay-Jay Potterdotter