Musings of a Morning Commute: The Patriarchy versus the conscious unconditional expression of Self
Driving into work today, I had an epiphany. Obviously, or else I wouldn’t be writing and posting it here. I noticed that in addition to the stereotypical white male, strutting with entitlement across the streets of the City of Philadelphia, I noted the stereotypical black male doing the same. Then it dawned on me. In modern feminism or just fed-up-with-patriarchal-bullshit-ism, we accuse the typical white male described above of asserting himself in ways that stifle the other. By “other” we imply everyone other than said “stereotypical white males”. However, what I’ve noticed during this morning drive is...that's just men (period).
I saw it! With my own two eyes, black men also walking across the street when it was not their right of way; taking the light when it was not their right to do so. Pushing past women and other...fellow...minorities in the street to get to some random spot in the cement sidewalk first. Or even better...a parking space in a sea of parking spaces in a parking garage FILLED WITH PARKING SPACES. That’s when I figured it out. All men assert this way. All men walk as if the Earth was made for them. The difference between white men and black men in this regard is our, the collective “our” perception of them when they do it. Or at least the perception of the world before “the awokening”. White male assertion is often met with promotion, praise, encouragement, and affirmation. Black male assertion is met with disgust, disdain, fear, suspicion, and hostility, amongst other things. But the message and the understanding is the same: Men assert in this world. Everyone else submits.
So what does this mean? And this is where my other epiphany comes into play. Many of us women have done this experiment at one time or another: walk straight down the street and continue to walk straight until we’ve reached our destination. Do not, under any circumstances, move out of the way of any one person. What happens? A stressful display of women bumping into a lot of people. What’s the second most common thing that happens, we notice how many people scurry out of our way or play chicken with us until the last possible second, brushing our shoulders with theirs because….they were probably administering the same experiment too...and/or they were a male identifying person. We do this, yes! We do this consciously, yes! We do this because we’re curious or we read in a self-help feminist book somewhere that in order to counteract the symptoms of decades of patriarchal abuse we must start consciously asserting ourselves on the street. And there it is...the paradox of consciously asserting ourselves.
Men do this unconsciously. Why? Obvious! They’ve been groomed since birth to believe that this is their sidewalk. There are many other sidewalks but this one is there’s and they shall walk on it...and surrender it to no one. We were not taught as such. So we must assert consciously. And what is the result of this? ….A bunch of human beings zipping around each other (in automobiles sometimes) asserting themselves to other people, also asserting themselves; bumping into one another, not saying excuse me because “this is my sidewalk and I deserve to be here. Nay, I WILL be here.”
Well that doesn’t sound like a recipe for a loving and accepting society, does it? That sounds like more of the same. So what do we do? That’s when the third and final epiphany hit me: What if we, the collective we, decide to consciously allow everyone around us (including ourselves in this allowance) to exist and express who we are without conditions and without feeling the need to stifle their expression with an overbearing assertion of our own?
While you’re pausing in reflection to let that one marinate, consider the following: The symptoms of the low vibrational Patriarchy thus far have been greed, pride, fear, and hate (list not exhaustive). I think we can all agree that we’ve seen these symptoms illustrated by someone, or something in our lives at some point. Maybe ourselves (no judgment). My fellow feminist sisters, of varying degrees, feel now is the best time, if ever there was one, for the rise of the Matriarchy and feminine rule. (And all the males in agreement with modern patriarchy echo: Over my dead body!) Here we are at an impasse. What good is the rise of the more compassionate and caring pole of our energetic duality if we’re going to administer it as if it were the current, low vibrational aggressive and domineering pole? None...that’s what good...none good. So, take a moment, if you will, to consider being you and allowing others to do the same without condition. Correction...the only condition being that we do not harm anyone or impose our identity and expression on others.
If a large enough portion of the collective begins this shift in consciousness, the remaining portion will follow suit. If nothing else, at least we’ll stop bumping into each other during our morning commute to work.