For the fanfic ask (This Ain't Love): #1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 9, 11 :D
Wow! A lot of questions, yay! Okay, let’s try to be serious v.v
1: What inspired you to write the fic this way? The tons of Abusive!Akashi fanfics out there -.- And I am not joking. I had in my mind to write a story about an abusive relationship since a very good while, I’ve always been more inclined to this kind of fics dealing with sensitive topics because I think sometimes there’s too much simplification of how these things really can be, too much stereotypes, and I’ve always wanted to try to give my sight of it. Akashi mischaracterization gave the start to this all v.v
3: What’s your favorite line of narration? Mmm, it is still to come, but
“There was light. A lotand white, it entered the window to reflect briefly on the candid sheets likeon a wedding dress gown, brightening the room up, too much, making it blinding. | Akashi didn’t evennotice. Laying on his left side, on the crumpled mattress and sweated blankets,he stared at his left hand laying on the pillow, palm up and slightly bentfingers, each one a bit more so that he could see every phalanx and wrinkle.” Ch. 10 ^-^
4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue? Ugh. It’s difficult when it comes to this kind of fic to find a piece of dialogue that I “like”, since most are filled with insults or bad things, but I think I can say I liked Nijimura’s
“They’re all walking on eggshells around you. They’ve always been like that.But I’m not like them, you know, so don’t expect me to be good and put on somefake smile like Momoi or Kise to pretend all the time I don’t know you’reshowering us in lies.” Ch. 6
5: What part was hardest to write? I’m gonna pass as a sadist, after this, but it’s been the ‘happy’ parts. Every time Akashi was to be serene or calm I got troubles because I was scared he would be “Out Of Character” as a Rape and Abuse victim. I “not too bad” with abuse scene because I’ve worked on them for years now -my first original story was about a deaf and dumb guy living with an abusive father so I got to try my hand at these scenes a lot- but happy scenes after angst? They’re the most difficult part for me.
6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics? It deals with a theme that’s quite important to me. I’m not minimizing abuses and rapes on females, but I think the male abuse and rape has been and still is too much ignored. It’s not like they can’t get stuck into situation like these, it’s not like they’re invincible or untouchable. I know a lot of males that are frail and I don’t think any less of them; if anything, I would kick anybody’s ass for them. Also, Akashi is character I feel extremely protective of and I wanted to talk about him in a different way. Also, this story is important because it took me an year to be written (it was it birthday the day before yesterday, yeee!) but a particular year of my life and it allowed me to get to know and get close to a lot of people that now I deem extremely important parts of my life.
9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic? Yes. At first, this story was born as an AoKise with Aomine as a cop finding Kise after years without seeing each other and noticing bruises on his arms. Then I realized it wasn’t believable because Kise was far too strong-minded to allow Haizaki to hurt him that way (and also there were already tons of stories like that). I found out two thousands stories of abuse had Akashi as an abuser and went “You think that? Well, then!” and here we are.
11: What do you like best about this fic? It made me grew, as a writer. I could feel my style changing chapter by chapter and I’m seeing writing its sequel that I shifted a lot from convoluted to concise, but keeping my usual attention to gesture and floral metaphors. I think I like this style better than how I was before and I’m glad.
Thank you very much for asking, really! :D
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