#thiswillgetdeleted

[conjugal---burns]

*deletes every post that is mine, reblogs posts to cover up that I ever actually posted anything*

[shoveeitwhereitdontshine]

I haven't done this in quite a while, but well, I think its about time.

The person I was has completely disappeared. Everything that I once thought I believed has simply withered away. I have no idea who I am, what I am doing, why I love who I love, why I am doing what I am doing.  But I love it. 

At least I thought I did. I can feel my friends distancing themselves from me. I can feel everything I had slowly falling apart.  I do not know if I should be doing this anymore.  I do not know if I can even go back.  I'm losing everything. 

[didwenotcare]

Ive had many first kisses but the first one i actually remember, the first one that meant anything to me was when I was 16. I had gone on a date with this guy and I had gotten very close to this girl. We were best friends, I guess, and she went with us. It was like a group date or something. Well anyways, she drove me home and in my driveway she said she liked me *flashback to how I met her* I knew her for 5 years prior to this day and I remember the very first time I ever laid eyes on her. She was beautiful even if we were just 11. I remember everything about her, everytime I saw her. Just everything. She was my cousins friend when we were little and I would go to my cousins house anytime I heard she was there. I guess you could say I loved her from the very moment I saw her, as cliche as that sounds. The first time I saw her I was at a horse farm riding a golfcart in the rain. My cousin gets there and this girl pops out of the car in this hideous baby blue jacket. She had braces and a smile that could kill. And it did, it killed me that day. We would ride 4wheelers, I would drive and she would hold so tight to me I had never felt more secure. When we would watch movies I would always pick the scariest ones so she would get closer to me. We were together alot throughout the years until we became best friends until the night of the sort of group date. We were in my driveway, she says she likes me. We kissed. I was so nervous; I felt like I was on fire. It lasted 5 seconds but I could kiss this girl for a life time. After, I literally ran away. I jumped out of the car and ran into my house. I was...happy

[sr-journals]

Due to heat boredom 🙅😂 #demilovato #madeintheusa #fangirl #bitchesbelike #thiswillgetdeleted 🍗 #chickenwang #preciousface #hashtaghashtaghashtag