☞ + Thomas from TMR.
Send me ☞ + a character to see how I would portray them. [accepting]
(I actually already play Thomas. *cough roguerunnertom cough* But here is a sample from my blog!)
Thomas feels sick. That’s the only word that describes it well enough, the one that stays resident in his mind, along with the sloshing in his nearly empty stomach. He hadn’t been able to keep anything down. Whatever Group B tried shoving into his mouth and down his throat just made its reappearance moments later.
How could she do this? How could Teresa turn her back on him so easily? Was this the work of WICKED? Are they controlling her every thought, every move that she makes? Based on what Thomas knows now, he wouldn’t be surprised. He’d be less shocked to find out that Chuck was still alive.
If WICKED is so good, why do they keep doing things like this? Thomas can’t wrap his head around it. Every time he thinks he has a grasp on things it slips through his fingers like flimsy puffs of smoke. And this is worse. It’s like he can’t even see what he’s trying to get a hold on. He can’t begin to form a solid thought to hold onto and he’s never felt anything more frustrating. It’s like showing up in the Box all over again. So many questions blur together in his mind, drowning in the vast sea of emotions that he’s feeling.
Teresa wants him dead. That’s all he knows, but does he know that for sure? Does she really want to do what she’s saying she’ll do? Thomas doesn’t want to believe that. He wants so desperately to think that this is all an act, that the kiss meant something, that everything he feels for the girl isn’t a lie.
Shuck it, he thinks to himself. Why should it matter anyway? All that he should be thinking about is getting to the Safe Haven, getting back to the Galders, maybe what all of this means, but all he can focus on is what Teresa really thinks of him. If all of this isn’t an act, then what had he done? What foul act had he committed to poison the bonds of friendship that he and Teresa had created in the Glade? Was all of that a lie? Or had he really done done something to her? He can’t recall. It’s not like his blotchy memories where bits and pieces are missing, this one doesn’t exist at all. Unless they wiped him clean when he was shot, then he can’t remember ever causing any sort of harm to Teresa.
He wants to call out out to her, reach for her in the depths of his mind, but he knows that it’s useless. She won’t answer. Either it’s all part of her act or she really does hate him to his core. The very idea of Teresa hating him makes his stomach lurch, like he’s going to throw up again and his heart ache with a cold, icy feeling that makes it weigh heavy in his chest. He’d made her a promise and hell, he should have listened to her. He should have listened to her when they got out of the Maze. He should stop making promises, he isn’t very good at keeping them. But this time, he made good on his promise. Or did he really? She found him after all, not the other way around.
Maybe that’s what I did, he thinks to himself as he somehow starts to find sleep against the “ugly tree”. He thinks of Teresa too, and the fire she caused in his chest instead of the flames of rage that flickered in her eyes.