im gonna take a break and lay down some SICK THUNDER TIME HEADCANONS - Albatross watches a lot of classic kids anime like Yugioh or Pokemon or Sailor Moon and has some of the highest rated fanfics on fanfiction.net because his fics are just SO BAD. - when Al gets sick Richard will have him stay at his place so he could cook all sorts of spicy foods for him because apparently that makes sick people feel better in richards head?? - Richard has a bunkbed and always. ALWAYS. sleeps on the top bunk. - they go to an anime convention every year (bc of Al) and even though Richard is surrounded by so many unfamiliar people in costumes, he manages to enjoy it since he knows Al would be there to protect him from anything Rich's wild mind comes up with - Richard somehow always is able to send back a text within a few seconds of him recieving it - when they move in together, they get fish. they get LOTS of fish. theres so many fish in this apartment oh god this is animAL HOARDING PLEASE RELAX
so the back story is: al’s secret agents friends deciding its richards turn to be prodded at and als all “fuck”
so anyway it starts with albatross getting richards number out of cousin or someone so he can ask him about cheat codes and shit but instead richard is like “DO ALL THESE TESTS AS FAST AS POSSIBLE TO PROVE YOURE REALLY AL B. TROSS” so al does all this silly shit bc he really wants to find the cheat dealer. but then as it goes on richard starts asking dumb shit like if hes gay or what kind of food he likes and al is like “bro what” and kinda flattered and richard is like “COMPLETE THE TESTS OR NO DEAL” and then al is like “gotta do this for the government” when in actuality its more like “i enjoy this mans company but lets ignore that fact”. so then when they see each other at school again richard shows up with a packed lunch of the food al likes and hes like “oh no i had no idea u liked this stuff WHO WOULD HAVE GUESSED” and offers him some and al goes “youre aware you asked me what kind of food i liked, right?” and richard completely freezes in a blush and fuckin ROCKETS OUT OF THE CAFETERIA and al is standing there in daze like “holy hell” and sits down to eat the meal richard definitely did NOT make him and the entire time hes thinking about their interactions and “lmao wwhat a weird guy” and all is well for the neither for them bc al is just a nerd and hasnt even considered genuinely caring about Richard BUT ITS GONNA HAPPEN YO AND WHEN IT DOES ITS GONNA HIT HIM LIKE TRUCK. FALLING IN LOVE WITH A KINGPIN WONT LOOK GOOD ON HIS RECORD.
fuck i should probably stop here or i might go on for ages
HAHA WHOOP NO IM TYPING SOME MORE
so a little while after lunch that day al “casually” and “secretly” looks for richard but its pretty obvious hes doing so and he doesnt text him either bc he doesnt want richard to know hes looking for him (bc that could compromise his “well-kept” secrecy). so in the end their combined obvious hiding and seeking allows them to meet up shortly before schools over and al is like “So, whyd you run off like that? Where you running from… sins of the past, maybe?“ in refence to the crime ring and richard is all “no i didnt.” with that wide eyed straight face hes known for and they exchange “yeah huh”s and “nuh uh”s for like two entire minutes, just staring at eachother in the hallway and richard progressively gets redder and redder until eventually they both just stop and look dead in the eyes of one another and at this point even al is blushing and he leans in a little closer to richard (whos standing before him) ANNNNDD Al turns away to breathe a little and not totally melt under the intensity of the situation and he starts saying something like “You sure are a puzzle, arent you, Richard?” as he turns back around and all he sees is the back of richards jacket and his hand reaching out to slam the door at the end of the hallway (bc u know miller has a NEED 4 SPEED) and al just smiles and just decides to bounces, like, a class early bc its fuckin friday and dude he doesnt even GO to this school
so then Al calls his secret agent friend Condor over the weekened and is all “richard miller is SUPER SUSPICIOUS and so i will keep a sharp eye on him. no need for back ups or anything” and condor is like “albatross thats fuckin dumb why do you wanna pursue this guy yourself” and al explains that he can TOTALLY HANDLE this guy on his own and mumbles “…and hes kinda.. cute…” under his breath and Condor says something like “okay but dont let your dick get in the way of what needs to be done” and Al blushes like a loser while he attempts to make a point to state that he can totally separate his head and his heart and immediately after that statement hes all “anyway i called you for SERIOUS REASONS” so they talk for a little bit after that about other things that arent as interesting as this pair im shipping with literally one other person
so anyway, monday morning theyre at school and richards calmed down a bit and writing in his dumb little conspiracy book that has far too much information on literally EVERYONE and tons of pics of Al from that text interrogation and suddenly taira is being a dick and RIPS RICHARDS BOOK FROM OUT OF HIS HAND and he is just shunned and all “I NEED THAT INFORMATION IM SO CLOSE TO TYING IT ALL TOGETHER” (which obviously hes not) and they play tug of war over it and some of those photos of Al fall out and Tairas all “what the hell are you doing with photos of that shirtless blond guy doing jumping jacks and posing with various plants” and richard gives one last tug and send then toppling down (because tairas clumsy and thus bad at balancing) and he is just SO OFFENDED so he gathers up all the photos if al that richard didnt have safely tucked in the binder in his arms and is like “im gonna blackmail u…. to AVENGE MY CLAAAAAAN” or some dumb taira shit and they totally get detention for it
later in the day, Taira flushes out richard from where ever the hell he was hiding and says something like “YO BRO I JUST REMEMBERED I DIDNT EXPLAIN MY RULES FOR YOU. MY BAD” so he goes on the say that hell tear up the photos and tell al all about his “stalker binder” and richard was desperate to not have his “evidence” destroyed so he agreed to whatever task Taira had for him. (all of which are gonna be mundane or silly bc taira is a fuckin nerd)
MEANWHILE al is supposed be planning his next act of spy work but all he can find himself doing is constantly scrolling back through his texts to richard when he had the free time (ie when he wasnt forcing himself to listen to the class lesson that he wasnt even supposed to be there for anyway). its not hard for his classmates to notice since hes got the biggest grin on his face, accompanied only by a faint blush. during one of those times, Donko leans over to his desk and whispers something like “sooooo whos youre new sweetheart??” and it takes Al a moment to process what she said because hes so caught up in richard. but then it hits him and hes all “Oh, y’knowwwwww. no one really. Just a friend.” as it takes a few tries go shove his phone back into his pants pocket and tries to repress a gay lil blush. drum girl starts giggling and is like “you dont have to be shy!!” and al goes “Really. its nothing” even though it obviously WAS something. and then antibravoman probaly starts monologuing about love and his broken emo soul or some shit but no one hears. no one pays attention to antibravoman. AAAAANNYWAY so soon enough the bell rings for lunch and hes all “oh thank god LETS GO FIND RICHARD”
so Al gets his meal and spots goddamn Time Crisis sitting next to TAIRA (and sky kid, maybe) of all people and hes like “that guy is a douche but ill take my chances” so he comes up behind Richard and asks if he can sit with him (richard specifically), using his classic smooth tone and talking. taira goes ahead and welcomes al, knowing richard is most vulnerable to his blackmailing scheme when hes around. meanwhile the blackmail-ee kinda just. briefly looks Al in the eye and drawls out a very quiet “go.... awaaaayyy....” or something equally as threatening and then glances away both in fear and in butterflies and al is like “richard r u ok”
but before he could reply taira says “hes just a little tired from EATING FOOD with me last night, arent you bro?” and he looks at richard with the most innocent face because he /knows/ hed look hella cool if everyone thought he eats, and hes theres no way richard could deny that claim. so richard is all “Yeah man He definitely… Showed up at my house and I cooked his dinner.” he looks back at al, but glances down to the table before continuing “And stuff.” in a pretty matter-of-fact way that was pleading “PLEASE BELIEVE ME” still tho taira was like “yes that is exactly what happened my dude” and upon hearing that al was a little heart broken bc it most definitely sounded like a date. al didnt say much after that because hed rather stare regretfully at his food than lock eye to eye with his boi bc hes too afraid to hear that “yes, it really was a date” even though the both if them would say no
ANYWAY. BACK TO WHAT YOU CAME HERE FOR.
so al decides hell join richard for the class after lunch so al kinda trails him but loses sight of richard because hes fuckin sonic the hedgehog reincarnate so al walks to class all by himself, and just plain stops in front of the closed door that leads to their classroom. since he didnt have much time before, he takes a moment to recompose himself and try to get it out of his head that richard might actually be dating taira BEFORE he spends an entire hour in his warm, attractive, friendly presence. and it kinda worked until he actually entered the classroom. there was a sole, empty seat in front of Namco High’s own conspiracy theorist. and on top of that, richard watched him as he came in, blushing at the eye contact and quickly turning away after Als first step into the room. al sits down and turns back to richard like "hey man done anything DANGEROUS lately” and richards like “i accidentally left the stove on one time” or “i climbed up a tree and fell down” and al is all “no i mean. CRIMINALLY. something REALLY BAD. like dealing cheat codes maybe?” and rich replies explaining how cousin says his food tastes criminal and Al quits listening maybe 1/3 the way through bc hes just staring at how richard moves his mouth to speak and the gestures he makes with his hands and doesnt even realize that richards stopped talking and is now staring at HIM and Al turns back to the board rapidly and says something like “thats cool dude” and is probably blushing
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things to add in somewhere:
“Albatross!? ............No.”
mentioins of pants so scandalously low that its been outlawed since al first showed up to namco high (thanks tessa)
