Time For a Bathory
"Oh! God... is that? Ugh!" Buffy said, tossing the phone into Dawn's hands and turning to look out the window of the tower. For miles, it was nothing but deep green grass, trees and Hungarian hills. Dawn peered at the screen. "Yep, that's a nude." "Oh goody!" Xander said, getting up from his seat on the dungeon floor to look over Dawn's shoulder. "No goody! No goody!" He covered his good eye and stumbled backward. "Why?! Why?!" "We need to do something about this," Buffy said. "The appendage has appendages!" Xander said, still traumatized.
"Do something about demon dick pics? I don't think there's any way to slay this trend," Dawn said. "At least, not as long as Andrew is working in the autopsy room at home base. I wonder if that dick was still attached to a body..."
"What? No," Buffy turned to her sister with a look of disgust, then started looking around the dungeon. "There has to be a way out of here. And we need to find Faith.” Buffy had left the slayer army in Scotland to visit Hungary — with the intention of slaying Elizabeth Bathory, also known as the “Blood Countess.” She was the first known female mass murderer. Humans didn't think she was supernatural, just vain, and rumor had it that she would bathe in the blood of her servants because it kept her young and beautiful. Buffy knew better, though.
Elizabeth may have bathed in their blood, but it wasn't to stay gorgeous. She was a mother fucking vampire, damn it. And Buffy was gonna dust that ass. When the Slayer heard that hundreds of girls were going missing, Willow and the Scoobies looked into it and found that Elizabeth was up to her old tricks. Since Buffy didn’t know exactly what she’d find when she arrived in Hungary, Willow teleported her, Xander, Faith and Dawn so she’d have backup. Only, it didn't work perfectly... on account of the fact that only three of them ended up in what appeared to be Bathory's dungeon. And even though Willow said she had the spell under control (despite several glasses of wine) and would safely teleport Faith from Cleveland... Faith apparently ended up, well — elsewhere. Buffy wasn’t even sure if Faith was teleported to the same country at this point. Buffy scanned the grey stone walls, looking for anything that might give. The dungeon was circular and there were no doors — just the one rectangular window. Why did this room even exist if there was no way in or out? SCREECH. Buffy, Xander and Dawn whipped their heads toward the window. Something very loud and very demony just wailed at them. The Slayer ran over and looked out to see a deep purple, pterodactyl-esque creature swooping up and down in the air very close to the tower. It must have been 30 feet wide and 80 feet long, and the color of its scales shined brilliantly in the sun. Its tail was long and had red goo dripping from it.
Buffy watched the tail flick and then ducked as the liquid came off and sailed through the window. It landed next to Dawn and melted right through the stone of the floor. Dawn squealed. "Yikes!" Xander said. The pterodactyl wannabe roared and screamed at Buffy, its silver eyes locking with hers, daring her to to fuck with it. Buffy took one last look around the dungeon, and seeing no apparent way out — made her choice. Buffy crawled up onto the wide ledge of the window, crouched down and furrowed her brow. "Buffy! No!" Dawn said, taking a step forward and reaching out toward her sister. "Yeah, Buff," Xander said. "Stop and think about this!" "I've never been much for the ponder, Xand" she said — letting out a sigh and leaping off the ledge.