Charlie was shaking when he got out of the shower. He’d made sure that Kennedy was sleeping before he took his shower. He had cried in the shower. If it had been anyone else, even Sam, Charlie wouldn’t have let that happen. He trusted Kennedy. Charlie wanted to feel desired by the other boy. he knew it was wrong to have sex with someone who was engaged. Even if it was Kennedy. Sam was going to hate him. And he was going to find out. This wasn’t something that could easily be hidden.
After the shower, he pulled his clothing back on and sighed. Charlie looked at his reflection in the mirror. He didn’t look different, but he felt different. More confident, if that was possible. The shower might have helped him feel a little better, but he still felt disgusting, if that was possible. He’d slept with an engaged man. No matter if that man was someone he loved. No matter if it was his best friend. No matter if this was someone he needed to be around. He shouldn’t have let that happen. But it had felt so right.
Charlie could still feel Kennedy pressed against him. It had felt so good, so worth it. But now that it was over, Charlie wondered if Kennedy regretted it. If he regretted it. What if Sam found out? Would he blame Charlie? Would he leave Kennedy? It just seemed like none of it was worth it and Charlie almost wanted to take it all back – but it was impossible. He walked out of the bathroom, seeing Kennedy sleeping. A smile curled on his face. He walked over to the sleeping boy.
“Sleep well, my raven boy,” he whispered. His chest felt heavy and he pulled his jacket around his shoulders. Charlie let out another sigh and walked away from the room. He needed to help plan the wedding of the boy he’d just slept with. How ironic was that? How wrong was that. The blond boy walked out of Kennedy’s bedroom closing the door.
“Are you feeling okay?” a voice asked, startling Charlie.
“No,” he replied, looking at Beatrice.
“You love him.”
“Yes.”
“He loves you too.”
“I know. He loves Sam too. I love Sam too.”
“My boy,” she whispered, pulling him into a hug. “I think things will work out in the end.”
“I hope so.” He sniffled and hugged the woman back. “Sorry I messed up your family.”
“Oh, honey. You’re family too. You always have been.”
“I have to go.”
She nodded and smiled at him. “Don’t blame yourself for the way things are, Charlie. You are a good boy. You deserve to be happy.”
He smiled, then turned away and frowned. He didn’t believe that. Not when he’d aided in hurting Sam. It wasn’t as if that’s what he’d meant to do. Deep down he knew that’s what would happen if he slept with Kennedy. He could still feel Kennedy’s lips on his own as he walked downstairs to where the wedding planning had been set up. Patrick looked up as he entered the room, but Charlie couldn’t look anyone in the room in the eye.
“Where’s Kennedy?” Patrick asked.
“He’s tired from travelling… and… he told me to tell you that he’ll probably just spend the day resting if that’s alright.”
“Why are you wet?” the man asked, brows furrowed in confusion.
“I took a shower. I had a talk with Kennedy and ended up crying, so he told me to shower to relax,” the lies slid easily off his tongue. That probably wasn’t something to be proud of, but he was thankful for that ability right now. “What are we working on today?” he asked, turning his attention to the wedding planner and avoiding looking at Sam. He was going to know almost instantly from the way he was acting. Dear god, he wanted to take it back. Looking at Sam for a moment, he felt guilty. He loved Kennedy, but dear god the boy he was with now he loved just as much. Charlie wanted Sam too. It was difficult to sit that close to him without remembering he’d been with Sam’s fiance less than an hour before. How greedy was he to want the other boy beside him? Any accidental brush of their hands during the time the planner was there resulted in a swift apology on Charlie’s part, a blush rising on his cheeks every time.
Yeah, there was no way Sam couldn’t figure out for himself what had happened.
