The Line Between Love and War
C H A P T E R 1 3: TIKTOK AND BUZZFEED
“It is said that the night sky is made up of tiny wishes that humans were never able to fulfill. That the stars only became bright by the fulfillment of those wishes. In your eyes, the stars that shine never seemed real, your childhood wishes dark and dim as you grow. But now, now you understand the twinkle in their eyes as they look down at you.”
Summary: Your experiences told you that soulmates were something you would never have the pleasure of having; something not given to you because of who you are, despite the soulmark that resides on your inner left wrist. During your solo trip to Los Angeles, you find out that you are more than capable, that your soulmates had been waiting for you for a long time, and would not be letting you go anytime soon.
Genre: soulmate au, bts au, idol bts, polyamory relationship, eventual smut
Paring: Idol!BTS x autistic!mc
Status: Ongoing (randomly updated)
Warnings: mental illness, talk of disability, lots of angst, miscommunication, feelings of depression, feelings of isolation, polyamory bts, stalking, dangerous behavior, eventual smut,
Chapter Warnings: overstimulation, not much needs warnings.
Masterlist // Chapter 12 // Chapter 14
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That entire weekend was a complete whirlwind for you, to the point where you were now wrapped up in a blanket (Jimin’s blanket specifically because it was the softest in the hotel suite which was something the rest of the boys immediately went online to buy, ignoring Jimin’s smug smile as he handed you his blanket).
You spent the entire night before Jin’s birthday riding all the rollercoasters with Jungkook and Jin, while your other soulmates were content to watch from the ground with soft smiles on their lips as they watched you bond with the two over your adrenaline junkie like tendencies, Jungkook especially.
Then, your morning consisted of very little sleep, all cuddled together on your shared bed with Jin and Yoongi, before having to get up for rehearsal and soundcheck again.
This time, however, you did not attend either.
“I’m sleeping right here.” You proceeded to point to the small two seater in their dressing room before promptly dropping yourself and your (Jimin’s) blanket onto the furniture, backpack and all following you as you flop.
You didn’t care, curling up and falling asleep as soon as your head hit the surprisingly soft cushion. Two hours of sleep was simply not enough for you and you knew you would need it.
And you did need it because the concert was, again, overstimulating. You sat in the box with Hobi’s family and Jungkook’s family who had flown out for the second night. You had your headphones and at one point, managed to relax enough to dance and sing along a little to the boys as they had fun on stage.
You didn’t even know they had invited Megan the Stallion to perform with them, a huge surprise to all army that night.
Once the concert was done, you and the boys had taken tons of pictures with her and you watched as the boys made some tiktoks with her for her feature on Butter.
You weren’t comfortable being in any of them just yet, despite the offer. While the night was overstimulating again, you did have more fun than the previous night and maybe thought you could get used to going to concerts in the future.
After another live, you spent the rest of the night singing Happy Birthday to your eldest soulmate and cuddling in the living room with him and the rest of your soulgroup watching movies Jin had picked out while you snacked on the cake Jimin and Taehyung had picked out with the help (read supervision of Hobi) earlier today between soundcheck and the concert to be delivered to the hotel.
Those two days of filled events led you to being in your current predicament, being held to Jimin’s chest as you were wrapped in his blanket. You weren’t nonverbal, nor overstimulated, but you felt off and that was enough for your soulmate to decide to bundle you up and hold you. He had won rock, paper, scissors, even though you were already in his blanket, which left your other, pouty soulmates to be left to their own devices.
Jungkook had made some food, more than enough for him and whoever else trickled in at the smell. Taehyung had just plopped right next to you, throwing an arm around your waist as you laid against Jimin, his other arm resting against your back as he surfed through social media.
You were unsure of where Yoongi and Hobi went to, but you vaguely remember hearing the hotel door open and close. Namjoon and Jin were in the kitchen area with Jungkook, talking about another interview show and the Jingle Bell Ball they had been invited to perform at.
It had already been decided that you would stay home for that, though. You had actually requested it, not feeling mentally up to going to another event so close after the concerts and you’ve just had a very crazy last couple weeks to say the least.
You were perfectly content to lounge on the couch and watch the events from the large flatscreen in the living room.
As you snuggled into your mates, the view of tiktok on Taehyung’s phone catches your attention, as you turn your head further to watch.
“I sometimes forget you all have like super-secret accounts on social media.” You mutter to your mate, catching his attention as he turns his phone so you can see better.
“Yup, we follow you now, as well. It’s easy when we make usernames like therealtaetae. No one suspects anything because a lot of army have similar usernames.” You nod along, knowing that army have been trying to find their real accounts for months now.
It’s nice to sit in silence sometimes, nothing overstimulating or overwhelming to occur. You felt completely at ease in your soulmate’s arms, something you never thought you would get to experience.
You can’t help but smile as you think back on all the times you dreamt of them, not realizing you would be soul bonding with Jimin and Tae, that they could see you and bring you real comfort when you needed it most.
You were almost grateful that you didn’t experience a bond with them, thinking how overstimulated you would be all the time and how no one would probably believe you anyways. You wouldn’t be able to find them given the amount of security the boys, and now you, have so all of your attempts would’ve been futile.
Fate works in mysterious ways, you think.
You feel Tae’s arms tighten around you as he nudges your head over so he has more room to lay his head in the crook of your neck. You giggle a little as he gently lays a kiss on your skin causing goosebumps to erupt.
You end up cuddling there for a couple hours before Yoongi and Hobi come back, bags in their hands as they come in through the door.
“Honey’s, we’re home!” Hobi yells cutely, smiling wide as he closes the door with his foot, Yoongi already making his way to the coffee table in front of you, setting his bags down.
Curiosity gets the better of you and you move to sit up, causing grumbles and protests to erupt from your two cuddly soulmates.
“What’s in the bags Yoongi? Hobi?” Your voice is a little gravely as you speak, causing Yoongi to smile softly at you.
“In the bag, pretty girl, are some things that we think we’ll need in the upcoming week as we move to do some more interviews and meet with some people regarding solo activities.”
You remember the conversation from the previous night, how the boys have been wanting to branch out musically and experiment with their own sound but still remain loyal as a group and band.
Bangtan would always be Seven.
They both then proceed to pull out tons of snacks and drinks and even a couple sweaters that looked extremely comfy. You couldn’t help but wonder why they needed snacks and drinks when food is usually provided for the artists at events if needed and we all usually go out to eat afterwards anyways depending on how tired the boys are.
As if sensing the questions brewing in your head, or more likely seeing the look of blatant confusion on your face, the Yoongi explains their purchases.
“Baby girl, these items are for you.” You look from him and Hobi to the snacks on the table, realizing they had bought your favorite snacks and drinks, ones you would eat at home all the time.
“We are going to be really busy this week and we don’t want you having to wait to eat when we know that you tend to get hungry while were out. We can easily push through our hunger, but we don’t want you to ever have to do that. So, we got you snacks and drinks that can go in your backpack for when were out.” Yoongi continues while you look through the snacks with Jungkook who had come out of his room with the others as Yoongi and Hobi came home.
“And the sweatshirts were actually Namjoon’s idea. We’re all going to wear them before we have to go so that we can get our scent on them.” You look to Namjoon who has a blush growing on his cheeks, reaching his arm up so he can rub nervously at his neck as he begins to explain his idea.
“Well, I noticed, we noticed that you always seem to relax or calm down when you’re surrounded by our scent so I thought we could help you by giving you something to wear that’s covered in our scents.” You barely give him time to finish speaking before your jumping on him, wrapping your legs and arms around your tall soulmate.
“Thank you Joonie. That’s very thoughtful of you.” You mumble against his neck as you bury yourself in his arms.
You’ve never had someone think of you like your boys do, always trying to do things for you and keeping you in their hearts and thoughts. You’ve never felt simple love like this and it makes you tear up a little as you continue to hold onto your soulmate.
“Well, while they decide who wears what sweater first, why don’t I take our little soulmate into the kitchen so we can get started on dinner? Hmm?” Jin takes the lead after everything is unpacked and you slowly begin to climb down from Namjoon.
You nod at your eldest soulmate and take his offered hand as Namjoon squeezes your waist in reassurance once more before moving over to supervise the now fight between Jungkook and Jimin over who gets to wear the blue sweater first.
-*-*-
Monday found you riding with Hobi, Jungkook and Jimin as you were on your way to an interview with Buzzfeed. The boys were going to be doing a couple of interviews with them today, including a remake of the interview with puppies, and a try not to sing or dance challenge amongst others.
You had loved watching these types of videos, finding them entertaining and hilarious, especially the try not to sing challenges.
You had said as much to the boys in the car with you, who then made it their mission to win whatever challenge was thrown their way.
You had tried to tell them that the videos were for fun, but even Jungkook shook his head, declaring himself the winner early making everyone laugh. From the corner of your eye, you could even see Seungho smiling a little at everyone’s banter.
Once the car was parked, it was a little whirlwind of movement that found you inside the studio, a light blue backdrop already set up for whatever interview/challenge they were going to film first. You couldn’t help but to look around the room, watch all the people getting the room ready for your boys.
The boys themselves made themselves very known, the laughter being heard from the dressing room down the open hall. It made you smile, hearing their laughter.
Seungho was with you, watching you interact with the room around you, slowly moving you a little to the left or the right so you weren’t accidentally in anyone’s way as you got lost in thought. He noticed you tended to do that, but he wasn’t bothered, and it seemed no one else was either.
“Alright guys, five more minutes!” Someone you didn’t see had yelled across the room, signaling the filming would begin soon. Even more commotion followed the man’s words because as soon as he yelled, the boys came barreling into the room, heading straight for you, excitement covering their features.
Hobi was the first to catch you, Jimin right behind him. “We get to do the puppy interview first!” Hobi’s excitement made you smile, knowing how much they loved animals. You all had watched some of the Buzzfeed videos last night, and they were excited to be able to get to do this.
They had all given you hugs or head pats as the moved past you, smiles accompanying their actions as they gathered in the middle of the backdrop, picking and teasing each other over the spots they picked.
You hung back with Seungho, finding a place where you could sit but where the boys could still see you as the filmed what the needed to. You ignored the looks from some of the interns, with their badges hanging proudly.
You just watched your boys have fun, playing with the puppies and answering questions, some about you. You all had talked about it numerous times, again and again, and each time you promised them they could answer any question they wanted about you, and your relationship.
You had trusted them; you had trusted them with a lot more that you had ever been comfortable with previously. But they were your soulmates, and you loved them with all your heart. You knew they would have your best interest at heart, always.
So, it made you a little warm inside when they happily and enthusiastically answered one of the three approved questions about you.
“Now, we know that you’ve finally completed your soulgroup. How has the adjustment been, bringing in your new soulmate?” The interviewer asked politely before gesturing to the boys.
“Well,” Namjoon looked around, “we haven’t really had an adjustment period. We have all just been taking the time to get to know each other and find our own groove.” The boys nodded along in agreement before Yoongi spoke up.
“She fits perfectly within our group, filling in the spots we didn’t know we had.” He smiles along in thought as he answers the question.
You and Seungho watched them as they answered a few more questions, some silly and some about their comeback from the army. When they were finally done, the get up and moved to sit with you as the interns slowly went forward to change the backdrop to a dark green one and brought a table forward with a couple chairs.
For the next segment, some of the influencers that Buzzfeed normally worked with were paired up with each member to try and accomplish a couple challenges together. The first was a try not to sing or dance, K-Pop edition. The next would be a try to guess the song challenge. All of this had been approved by HYBE and the influencers involved were known to be respectful K-Pop fans.
You were excited, to say the least.
Jimin had gone first and almost threw the table over when his partner and him had lost the second round, both getting up and dancing to View by Shinee. Jin had gone second, immediately forgetting it was a try NOT to sing or dance challenge and lost the entire thing with his partner, who had also given up on the second song.
By the time Jungkook had gone last, only Yoongi and Taehyung had won their challenges. You had almost thought Yoongi was gonna budge when a Big Bang song had come on, but he made it through.
Jungkook’s turn had finally come, and he had been impatiently watching by your side as his soulmates had their turns. He had been bouncing and trying his hardest to keep quiet as you both watched.
“I’m gonna win, just you wait.” You murmured to you as he stood up, receiving a thumbs up from you and a grin that he matched as he sat down at the table with his partner. You watched them high-five and brag about how they were gonna win, their determination showing for the camera.
In the end, however, they neither won nor lost.
“No, no, no, I didn’t dance. I was just breathing really strongly.” Anthony, Jungkook’s partner exclaimed when the buzzer went off.
“Yeah, really strongly!” Jungkook added, the both of them demonstrating that they were ‘breathing’ and not moving their shoulders to the beat. You couldn’t help but to cover your mouth to hold in your laughter as you watched your youngest soulmate try and manipulate his way out of losing each round.
It was funny, the excuses the duo were coming up with. It came to a point where Jimin, Hobi, Taehyung, and you had to leave the room as you couldn’t help but laughing, Jin having to drag you and Jimin out as you were stuck besides yourselves with laughter.
“I can’t believe him! Using the motion of the camera to justify his movement!” You laughed aloud once Jin closed the door behind your group. Jimin and Taehyung were clinging to each other as Hobi had his arm around you, trying to keep you upright and steady as you both watched your other giggling soulmates fall to the ground.
It took a couple more minutes for Jungkook to come out the door, pout very prominent on his lip as he went for Jin, falling dramatically into his arms as he wailed.
“They cheated!” Jungkook cried out, causing all of you to start laughing again.
The next challenge went about the same, however, you weren’t expecting them to come to you after Namjoon went last this time.
“Hello, Y/n. We were actually wondering if we could film a ‘guess the song challenge’ with you. We know you are a huge K-Pop fan and we think this would be a fun way for everyone to see how you interact.” The producer had asked you, nervously gazing at Hobi and Yoongi as they stood behind you, probably looking as menacingly as they could.
You thought about it, even looking over your shoulder to the two of your soulmates behind you, gauging their opinion, but when they looked at you, awaiting your answer, you turned back around.
“Sure, I’d love too!” You reply, a big smile on your lips showing your excitement at being able to participate after spending almost the entire day watching your soulmates have fun.
The producer nods at your answer before turning away. You turned in excitement to see more than just Yoongi and Hobi behind you. Your soulgroup was behind you, looking down at your bouncing figure, their smiles shining down on your excitement.
“Did you hear that? I get to film a challenge with you!” You almost shout in your enthusiasm, having Jungkook bring you into the middle of the circle, what you call the soulmate huddle.
You beamed up at them with excitement, happy to be involved and to be able to play the challenge with them. You sometimes imagined what it would be like to be a part of Buzzfeed, doing these challenges and seeing if you would win. You always played along from at home, competing against yourself to see if you would win; you always lost though.
You were sat between the winners from the first rounds, so you would be playing with Jungkook, Yoongi and Hobi. Namjoon had lost horribly, complaining that he wasn’t given enough time to answer, while Jin and Taehyung both just said they forgot they were playing a guessing game and started singing along. Jimin tried his hardest, but his partner was a very strong opponent.
It was Jungkook, then you sat sandwiched between Yoongi and Hobi who was sat at the end of the table. Each of you had a buzzer this time, with the fastest person to hit the buzzer and answer correctly each round winning.
The first song was Pirate King by Ateez, and all you needed was to hear the first beat to hit the buzzer. Jungkook yelled from your left as you answered confidently, Yoongi looking at you with both eyebrows raised and Hobi putting his head in his hands as they all realized you were some serious competition.
They seriously underestimated how much K-Pop you listened to, and how many groups you loved to listen to.
When What is Love by Twice played over the speaker, you squealed in excitement before hitting the buzzer, almost yelling the title before the ‘ding’ sounded out telling the group that you were right before you started dancing the main chorus’s choreo as the sound played over the speaker again.
You ended up winning, with Jungkook close behind you each time, missing the buzzer by seconds. You had so much fun you didn’t even realize the game was over.