“i’m sorry honey,” her mother, already pushing fifty but looking as young as ever with her carefully done makeup and dyed auburn hair, spoke softly. “come here.” she motioned to herself. heera dragged herself to the other side of the living room where her mother was sitting. old tears clung to her pasty skin as new ones trickled from her red eyes. she dropped to the floor at her mother’s feet and the older woman wove her fingers through heera’s jet black hair. minah leaned down and whispered comforting words to her daughter. the smell of expensive wine filling the air every time she opened her mouth.
“remember, this is what you wanted.” her mother’s words were suddenly sharp. no longer blurred by the alcohol. heera stopped her sobbing and looked up at the woman who had given her everything. heera remembered why she had come here. it wasn’t to seek comfort, at least it hadn’t been a conscious decision, she had stopped relying on her mother for that a long time ago.
“i need to find this person.” heera stood up and wiped her tears. “and i need to destroy them.” she wouldn’t have flown all the way to california if she didn’t mean it.
“if you had been more careful this never would have happened.” her mother leaned back in her chair. “why not ask your company for help?”
“i don’t trust them. this can’t get out.”
there was a silence. heera’s tone had demanded attention but her mother’s gaze and attention seemed to go right through her. she waited for the other to reply, growing inpatient by the second.
“i’ll look into it.” the older woman finally replied and stood up. “why don’t you have dinner with me and your father before you head back to seoul?”
“i had tea.” she told the truth.
“you have gained some weight lately, perhaps you should stick to water.” minah halfheartedly joked but it didn’t come across as anything but serious to heera. “and heera,” minah began walking away towards to kitchen to fetch herself another glass of wine. “don’t disappoint me anymore. having surgery wasn’t a sin but others don’t see it that way. i’ll make sure to find whoever is blackmailing you, but you make sure this doesn’t happen again.” with that she disappeared into the kitchen.
heera turned around and left the house. her mind was racing and she couldn’t slow it down. her body was on autopilot. she hopped in the car and watched as it drove through the crowded streets of l.a to the airport. she walked out into the crisp spring morning as the jet was preparing for liftoff and she laid down on the pavement. her hands reached for the blunt and lighter that were in her coat pocket, she always needed it after a visit home. there weren’t many people around save for the staff who simply went about their business. she was there for a while. maybe. time warped itself until the conversation and its cause were memories from long ago.
