Still highly depressed and unmotivated and dead inside.
But.
I figured out something something writing that has eluded me all this time.
In order to make Fiction in a 'real world' setting, you have to do as much world building for the city, real or fictional, as you possibly can to make it feel like a real place. I've always been if the idea that since the setting is in New York, you need to memorize the layout and use the street names and matching environments and shops. But no. You can make up your own streets and as long as you make it alive and real with your descriptions, it will be for the readers too.
Also, when I get a new idea, instead of starting it off with as much descriptive detail as possible, I should try to make it into a play or tv show script instead. I see my stories as movies in my head so that makes sense, and it would also help with dialogue and keeping everything moving. Don't know why I didn't think of that before, it seems obvious now. And it'll surely make the idea not seem so cringe.