<<This post is a part of a longer conversation about fanfic writers, how they view fanfic, and their writing process. All views are the fanfic writer’s own, and whatever fanfic they choose to write is entirely their own decision. No judgment value will be placed on fic content. These conversations are meant to provide insight for other fanfic writers in whatever stage they are at in their writing life>>
Final Thought Friday (with Tohje, @tohje )
Talk fanfic to me. The older I get, the clearer it has become to me that fanfiction is one of the very few places left in this world that is, ironically, free (er than most) of capitalism. It's the ultimate and the most real form of storytelling for me. People gather together and say: "I have this. It brings me joy and new ideas and all kinds of emotions. Let me share it with you, no reservations."
Summary: He has a list of things the Code asks him not to keep. He doesn’t keep the things themselves, of course. He would never harm his master, or his master’s reputation like that. Others - younger ones - look to him, a padawan to imitate. He keeps the memories of them, those moments. A trained Jedi knows many mnemonics. He takes them out sometimes, only sometimes, examines them from every angle, reaches for detachment. Who knows, he might even achieve it one day.
Why you should read it: Because the beautiful, clever symbolism. Because strong, yet delicate prose. Because deep and realistic and tortured and thoughtful Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan’s emotions and desires for Qui-Gon are represented by an extended nature metaphor (orchards and trees and growing things) that is utterly spellbinding and vivid. It is difficult, after being obsessed with these characters for two decades, to be gripped by brand new insights and views of Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn, but that is how I feel when I read @tohje ‘s works. Her word choice and phrasing is so unique, you’ll find yourself rereading a sentence you just read, to savor it, and marvel at the skill and creativity required. The love in this story is tender, and unfurls like the most rare bloom in Obi-Wan’s well-kept little orchard. Qui-Gon is perfectly himself. Who wouldn’t be head over heels for that man, in this story?
Oh, and it is *so hot* that the first time I read certain passages, I had to STOP and come back to them after gathering my wits. And because I wanted to draw out the experience. There isn’t a better writer in this fandom (or any other, I think).
Excerpt: His master is tall, broadly but gracefully built, damn nearly unshakeable when he takes a stance. His position in the Force is the one of a seaside cliff: waves of iniquity and the suffering of the Galaxy crash around him without causing any visible erosion. They threaten to sweep Obi-Wan off his feet instead, if he doesn’t lean back on the sun-drenched, immovable rocks. Qui-Gon may seem austere at first, features cragged, but the cliff hides a myriad of lifeforms in its nooks, shelves and hollows. Wildflowers. Proud, lonely, circling seabirds.
<<This post is a part of a longer conversation about fanfic writers, how they view fanfic, and their writing process. All views are the fanfic writer’s own, and whatever fanfic they choose to write is entirely their own decision. No judgment value will be placed on fic content. These conversations are meant to provide insight for other fanfic writers in whatever stage they are at in their writing life>>
In the Weeds Wednesday (with Tohje, @tohje )
Let's talk about your writing process. How does a fic start for you and how does it progress? It starts with a strong image or association. For example, “Malalignment” started with this mental picture I had about Obi-Wan cleaning a sleeping Qui-Gon's face in the medbay after a battle. After that, I outline in gibberish (a mash-up between my mother tongue and English) what scenes I want in the story and how I want the characters to change.
I usually write chronologically within the story, but if I'm stuck, I might jump around a bit, especially while writing a longer piece. For me, it's extremely satisfying that the plot and setting– for example: the mission and all its turns– reflect the characters' inner changes and dilemmas, so I plot around that. I don't plan motifs or symbols beforehand, but they usually start to emerge while I write, and I grab them with two hands and greatly enjoy using them.
How does writing in English factor into your process? I can't write in short bursts in English. I need more than an hour to concentrate.
How long does it take you to get a fic to a place to send to a beta reader? “Litanies” took, like, two weeks before I asked someone to give it a read. Longer pieces take usually four to six months, and of course I have a few eternity projects I have been sitting on for years now. I'm very lucky that people I ask to beta read for me know my style and my stumbling blocks intimately by now, so usually one round with them is enough.
What do you look for in a beta? Well, sometimes I'm still amazed that somebody is ready to do that kind of thing for me. Truly. It's time-consuming, because they have to check the grammar for me in addition to continuity errors or moments of too-much-vagueness (especially that last one!) so, I look for kindness, firmness and an eye for detail.
What’s the hardest thing you've ever attempted with a fic, and why was it difficult? I have a work-in-progress where Obi-Wan falls to the dark side on Tatooine to protect baby Luke. I chose a very fragmented style for it, and the act itself is so wildly out of character compared to my basal vision of him. So I have been wrestling with it for months now.
Some other fics have been easy to write but hard to publish because the character's wants or needs have actually made me realize something deeply private about myself, something I hadn't articulated before. Now when I look back, it might be something that actually resonates with the readers, because it's one of my more popular pieces: “Litanies”. I was reluctant to publish it because I felt...exposed to the elements, with Obi-Wan's pov. Litanies' Obi-Wan is my most personal Obi-Wan, and that Obi-Wan seems to feel true and resonate with readers, if I understand correctly.
And what were you hoping to articulate in that Obi-Wan? His need to be seen, to be under a loved one's true gaze. His need to shake a loved one. Finding the ability and strength to do so, which he didn't know he was capable of a moment before.
Now, for what I ask of everyone: say something nice about your writing. I like to write poems. Sometimes they get too long, and then I call them fics. Writing is my way to try to stay tender in this world, and I think it echoes in my words.
Any last advice for fellow writers? For English as a second language writers: Read, read, read in English. Grow a thick skin; not that you should accept anything unkind towards you, but you will make mistakes with the language. Even if you think you did alright. Because you did, despite the mistakes. They happen, you bristle, you learn.
<<This post is a part of a longer conversation about fanfic writers, how they view fanfic, and their writing process. All views are the fanfic writer’s own, and whatever fanfic they choose to write is entirely their own decision. No judgment value will be placed on fic content. These conversations are meant to provide insight for other fanfic writers in whatever stage they are at in their writing life>>
Meet-Cute Monday (with Tohje, @tohje )
AO3 stats:
Pseud: Tohje
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Current fandoms: Star Wars
Current pairings: QuiObi (Obi-Wan Kenobi/ Qui-Gon Jinn)
How many total fic: 10
Total word count: 128,965
Long fic word count: 34,851
Shortest fic: 1,639
Highest kudo count: 301
Lowest: 35
What's the story behind your pseud? It is a nickname my partner gave me years ago. It's a word play in my mother tongue and it means, roughly, "being very enthusiastic".
How long have you been reading and writing fanfic? I started when I was around fourteen I think. Harry Potter was my gateway fandom. The teenage me wrote fanfic in my mother tongue back then, and the HP community in my language was huge, in retrospect. I also started to read in English when I found out about MA archive (Master Apprentice archive) around the same time (there went the rest of my innocence, haha!) BBC Sherlock drew me back into fanfiction in my adult life, and then after that I remembered and returned back to Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon. I have been writing fanfiction in English since 2019.
Why did you start to write fanfic with your current writing incarnation? Well, my love for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon had been reignited. First it was a game, or maybe a riddle of some sort for myself: to see if I could do it and be relatively satisfied with the result in another language.
Did you have any goals or hopes or something that you wanted to get out of writing fanfic when you started? My goal was, and still is, joy. Writing those characters and their POVs was, for lack of a better word, joyful. Playful, in the best meaning of the word. I'm a very character-driven writer, like the majority of fanfic writers are I think. When the characters’ voices started to take shape and build and feel true to me– and when they started to get, heaven forbid, *opinions about the course of the story– that is for me one of the most deeply satisfying feelings in the world. I want to be satisfied with the quality of my words, artistically speaking, and I still hunt after that joy to this day. It doesn't mean that the writing should come easy, but it does have to bring me joie de vivre despite the struggle.
You have a very poetic style of writing in English. Very sparse, with a clear sense of meter and rhythm. I'm curious if you write the same way in your native tongue. I aim for the sparseness in both languages, yes. I find it stylistically pleasing, and a great way to bring lightness and space for breathing into the text. I admire many writers for that quality (Tove Jansson and Cormac McCarthy for example, although they are otherwise very different). I try not to underestimate the reader. Sometimes it backfires, but hey, that's why good beta readers are to die for. I love poetry and read it in English too. I savor and chew different words in sentences and may ponder between the alternatives awhile. I have to study English words very carefully to be sure that they convey the meaning and connotations I need them to. Downside is sometimes it can become pompous, but sparseness helps with that, I hope.
Do you write outside of fanfiction? Yes, creative writing has been my hobby since upper secondary school.
Have you been able to write much lately? Irregularly, lol!
I know you recently had a baby and had to step away from writing for a bit. I'm working full-time again, so between that, separation anxiety and wanting to be present as much as possible, writing definitely takes a hit. It wouldn't happen without my supportive spouse and his family living near enough to help. When I was writing my zine fic, my mother-in-law was simply irreplaceable.
How is it for you, writing with a newborn? Most of it can be capsulized into: "I haven't slept enough for this."
So a couple of weeks ago, I made a fic rec friday post about one of @tohje’s amazing fic.
Guess who’s back at it again? This time let’s talk about Tohje’s series Visions made of Flesh and Light.
The snippet right there is taken from the last fic of the series, Left to ponder your devotions as we are following Qui Gon. I won’t say more because I do not want to spoil that wonderful series for anyone who will decide to read it.
I’m just going to talk about this snippet and why I like it so much. It’s very much a personal opinion mind you and people might disagree with me.
That said, first let’s talk about the beautiful prose shall we? The first five sentences read like a poem (I love poetry, what can I say). The fic could have been this snippet alone and I would have been happy.
Second, this snippet a wonderful example of “be mindful of your feelings”. That’s what it is about : it’s about being honest with yourself and acknowledging how you feel and figuring out what motivates your actions (are you truly following the Force or in this occasion are you following your heart? your want? etc.)
Thirdly, and most importantly maybe, it’s a brillant character moment. It’s Qui Gon being honest with himself, he stops hiding behind “the will of the Force” and acknowledges that even when he’s trying to follow the will of the Force, it’s not so simple and it’s his feelings he’s following in reality, not the Force.
This is the core of Qui Gon’s struggle in this series and I feel it’s also the core of his struggle in canon. And it’s portrayed so elegantly here! With such few words!
Once again I highly encourage you to go read Tohje’s fics, they are all so good! And if you have read them already, then I highly encourage you to go read them again!
So I wanted to do this yesterday, but since time has lost basically all meaning, indulge me and think of today as friday still.
It has recently come to my attention that a wonderful fic may have slipped under the radar of the quiobi fandom.
What is the fic in question? Malalignment from @tohje
What is it about? It’s a Qui Gon lives story set during TCW where Obi Wan and Qui Gon have been estranged since Obi Wan knighting and find their way back to each other.
More under the cut for why you need to read this fic.
Why do you need to read this fic? Plenty of reasons trust me! First of all, Tohje is an amazing writer who can bring a staggering depth of emotions into their writing. The fics are also beautifully crafted both beautiful and poignant. An extended metaphor is woven through the story masterfully. A friend found the perfect words to describe it saying the fic was “ sharp, or raw ” and this is very true.
Second this fic has it all : idiots and estranged friends to lovers, amazing character voices, mutual pining etc. Mind the dissociative identity tag but don’t let it stop you because it’s done masterfully and gives us fascinating insight about Obi Wan Kenobi and what war can do to people.
It’s a story that will grip you and wont let you go until the end. And then it will live nestled against your heart. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this fic since i first read it, and it has informed a lot of my writing, especially when it comes to Obi Wan characterisation during the Clone Wars.
So please if you have made it this far, go read the fic and leave some love there.
