Jul 30, 2013
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Jake Dalton. Seriously, is there any girl in this world who doesn't like him?
Heading Home
Saturday - woke up to the normal business of taking a shower then heading to Starbucks or Tullys for coffee and Pompadour for breakfast. This morning it was another hot dog with spicy sauce and a slice of some kind of yellow fruit pie with an iced tea.
Check out was at noon so there wasn't much time to do anything before it was time to leave for the airport, so I wandered around and bought some supplies at the AM/PM. We grabbed the limo-bus heading back to the airport at 1pm for our 5:25 flight. There were more stops on the way out of town then when coming in, so the ride took a while but we didn't have to do much other than sit back and look out the window.
I lucked into another aisle seat on the way back to the US. With so much time to kill I got some food with Matt and then went into the different gift shops to find some last minute presents for people and something for myself as well. I was able to get a dark chocolate Kit-Kat for my Mom and a couple (one green tea, one yubari melon) for the ride back on the plane. The shop also had wasabi, cherry blossom and a couple other flavors, but nowhere near the full Kit-Kat lineup, which is pretty incredible (miso, soy sauce, lemon vinegar, etc).
I went into a souvenir shop and picked up a little wooden carving of a girl in a kimono, and some dried horse mackrel to bring back to the US with me. Hopped on the plane and a mere 8 hours and 50 minutes later we were back where we started, and the great Japan trip of 2011 had come to a close.
French Mariachi Menu
Friday - another morning feeling a bit less than 100% but all things considered a slight headache was worth the fun times had last night. Started off the morning with another visit to Pompadour where I grabbed a "special donut filled with curry of beef and a small boiled egg", a hot dog with some kind of spicy sauce and cheese, and a slice of apple pie. Walked back over to Roku Roku plaza to have my breakfast (if you can call it that) along with a peach iced tea. I eventually made my way back to the bookstore where I picked up an English/Japanese book for my Mom about the French Window, which was the art exhibit Matt and I saw at the Mori Art Museum. At some point during all of this there was a 6.0 earthquake centered about 70 miles east of Tokyo. I missed it completely, but I guess that Matt was able to feel it up on the 4th floor of the hotel.
We didn't really have any plans for today, so after meeting up with Matt and looking at a map we decided to visit the Meiji Shrine which we had missed during our first trip to Shibuya. It was pretty warm so it was nice to grab a little shade from the trees. We walked around the forest and surrounding gardens, sat down by a lake and watched the fish swim by and jump out of the water. We eventually made our way to the actual shrine itself and saw a woman wearing a traditional wedding outfit as well as a punker girl with ripped stockings and a leather skirt covered in safety pins. Not to get too deep or anything but that seems to be a great way to sum up Japan. You see these very serene places and then a punk rock girl cruises by and nobody looks at her twice. Or you take pictures of gardens that were designed hundreds of years ago and the background of every shot contains huge skyscrapers. That observation would probably be worth about a C- in any college level social sciences course, but it is interesting when you see it with your own two eyes.
After visiting the shrine we grabbed some lunch at the visitor center - we both had the Chef's Choice bento, of which we could identify about half the items on the plate. There was one pickled vegetable that looked like a green translucent tube and a small plate of something that tasted like pencil shavings mixed with beef jerky. We made a brief detour over to the gift shop where Matt picked up a toy for his desk at work, and then walked back to the Harajuku metro stop. We couldn't figure out if it was time to go home or walk around more, so we took one more walk down Takeshita Dori and then back to the metro to head for the hotel.
Matt and I swung by Crossover on Roppongi-dori for a couple of beers, and then we met up in the hotel lobby to head out to dinner with Catherine, Erin and Catherine's friend from Boulder who is living in Tokyo. We headed to a French restaurant in (I believe) the Mori Tower. The restaurant only had menus in Japanese so the waiter had to read out every option to us, which took a while and was pretty rough on the waiter. We ended up with a bunch of appetizers and I had salmon for dinner. At some point during the dinner the restaurant started playing what sounded like mariachi music, although it really could have been French or Japanese or none of the above. Considering that we had to order from memory based on rough translations ("Wine-Poached Salmon With Black Truffles" for example would be "Salmon") the dinner was actually really fun. Catherine and Erin showed off their sequined painted nails, I walked outside the restaurant and way down the hallway about ten times to use the restroom. All and all a success!
Matt went back to the hotel while Catherine, Erin and I went over to Abbott's Choice to grab a beer. After a quick one the girls headed back to the hotel and I made the last minute call to stay out since I was leaving the next day. I went back to Gaspanic Club 99 and had one beer, now ¥500 more expensive than the night before. The bartenders remembered me and asked if I went out with that guy afterwards, and I told them it was "no good" and went back to the hotel. They said they had only seen that guy once before and that he drinks too much. No argument here. I decided to walk to the other Gaspanic around the corner to see what that location was like, and it was night and day. The GP Bar was packed shoulder to shoulder with a DJ spinning, but unlike the Shibuya location this was more dance music than hip hop. The place was interesting though, and worth my attention for a beer or two. The place was busy which often makes it kind of a poor place to hang out by yourself, so I decided it was best to head back to the hotel. On the way back I sat at the intersection of Roppongi-dori and Gaien Higashi-dori and listened to a crazy homeless guy talk to himself and laugh at the girls walking by and then it was time to head back to the room to wrap up my last night in Japan.
Sketchy Sketcherton (Pt. 2)
Thursday - with Matt and Catherine out for a dinner appointment, I figured I would go out and check out a couple of the local bars. The first place I wanted to check out on Roppongi Dori was completely full, so I walked up to Gaien Higashi Dori and went right.
A big sign for Carlseberg caught my eye so I headed up one flight of stairs to find Abbott's Choice. Inside I found a small bar serving American and British beers along with traditional pub food like fish & chips. I pulled up to the bar and grabbed a pint of Abbott Ale which was served in a British style pint glass. It looks like a Boddington's or maybe a golden colored Guinness and it was outstanding. One of the bartenders asked me where I was from and if they have Abbot Ale in San Francisco, which I wasn't sure of. He asked me what kind of beer was popular in SF and I told him about Anchor Steam - turns out they have Anchor Liberty in the bottle. That did sound good, but I figured another couple of pints of Abbot would be fine. While I was sitting there I heard both Jessie's Girl and Don't Stop Believing come over their stereo (which was tuned to a NY station's internet feed) and had one of those "I just flew 6000 miles to drink a British beer and listen to the definitive San Francisco theme song" moments. Fighting back a goofy smile I figured it was time to leave on a high note, so I headed out the door to look for another spot to sit.
Next up was the second of the three different Gaspanic locations - this one called Club 99 and located just off Gaien Higashi Dori. I walked in and was immediately ushered to the bar - they won't let you stand around unless you have a drink in your hand. I picked up an Asahi for ¥300 and grabbed a seat at the bar. The bar was pretty empty except for a couple of girls and one guy who was running around talking to everyone. The guy comes over (let's call him Daisuke which means "great helper") and sits next to me and we have the standard "where are you from" kind of conversation. Daisuke kind of leans into me when he is talking, and I can't tell if it's because he is drunk, because he is a (in his words) "she man", or both. (BTW - I don't know for sure that he said "she man", but it sure sounded that way.) No harm done...he just seems like your standard jolly drunk guy at the bar, and not much harder to understand than some of the people I run into at the Blackthorn in SF. At one point he brings out a cruise itinerary showing that he is going to Boston. I couldn't figure out if he was going on vacation, but I got the feeling maybe he worked on the ship.
After a couple minutes of clipped conversation and a lot of nodding Daisuke runs over and grabs one of the girls and plops her down next to me at the bar. The girl is introduced as Miho, and Daisuke tells me that she doesn't really speak English but that she likes gaijin (foreigners). At this point I give myself a quick pat down just to make sure my wallet is still where I left it. Miho seems to be either tired or drunk and being that she doesn't speak English we don't really have much to do other than sit next to each other at the bar. Great idea from Daisuke - "speak body language" - and then he runs away giggling. Miho alternates between resting her head on the bar, and talking to Daisuke and the bartenders. At one point the bartender brings her a large cleaning pad (like you would use on a Swiffer mop, but larger) which she writes on and then shows to me - "your cock in my mouse" followed by a little heart. I read the note and just start cracking up, and tell her that she was very close and that it was a very good effort. I wave the bartender over and ask them for the pen so I can fix the spelling error, and once its fixed Miho attaches the sticker to her shirt so I can take the most disappointing picture of my entire life - the flash washes out the sign making it appear completely blank in the photo. The bartender and I help Miho with her pronunciation, and I use my hand to try to convey that a mouse is a small rodent and not a part of the human anatomy.
Miho sits back down at one point she turns back to me and asks how old I am, and before I answer I ask her how old she is. She lets me know that she is "20 - very young", and I agree that yes, that is indeed very young. Disturbingly so. I tell her that I am 33, which - assuming Japanese facial expressions are similar to those in America - she finds more surprising than revolting. She says something to the bartenders while using her hand to make a circle around her face, and they all look at me and nod. I'm assuming she was saying something along the lines of "he is 33 but has a baby face" rather than "I am going to rob this guy and then cut off his face as a souvenir" but I honestly don't know. A couple minutes later and Miho is either genuinely tired, or tired of my lack of attention towards her, so she tells Daisuke that she is going home. She leans over and gives me what can only be described as half hug, half handshake and then heads out the door with her friend who had been talking to a guy from Singapore (let's call him Joe).
At this point it's just myself, Daisuke, and Singapore Joe at the bar so after conferring with the bartender for a while Daisuke recommends that we all walk to the other Gaspanic bar (literally around the corner) which will be more exciting. Singapore Joe asks if I am going, and I figure I am done with Club 99 for the evening so why not. We walk out the door and dodge dozens of touts (almost all African except for one Eastern European guy) along Gaien Higashi Dori trying to get us to visit the clubs they are promoting. We reach the other Gaspanic location and I tell Daisuke that I am going to hang outside for a second, so he goes up the stairs with Singapore Joe. I take a quick inventory - I have a good story, my money is still in my pocket (except what I spent on Abbot Ale and Asahi), and I have not been arrested or punched in the teeth - so I figure its best to call it a night so I take off for the hotel laughing at what a strange night it had been.
* There are a couple of things I want to mention to go along with this story...
1) Gaspanic is a place that seems to generate a lot of extreme reviews - people either love that it's a good mix of Japanese and travelers or think it's a sleazy meat market. I think both views are right.
2) I have no idea if Miho was a hooker or just a local girl out looking to meet foreign guys, which is apparently very common at Gaspanic. I sure do hope it was the latter (better for the ego and for the story), although I suppose it doesn't matter much in the end. I wanted to ask the bartenders what the deal was, but I think that would probably be a tough question to get across with limited English.
3) Just for the record, I have not and would not ever pay for sexual companionship, a "massage with crazy" or anything along those lines. I am a lapsed Catholic, and while the religion may have faded, the guilt remains. I am not even comfortable getting a shampoo along with my haircut.
4) I feel bad ditching Singapore Joe with Daisuke - wherever you are, I hope you are holding on to your wallet and your face is still attached to your head.
5) Legal or illegal, US or Japanese, working girl or girl next door, drunk or sober - I am not hooking up with anyone who has been around fewer years than The Simpsons TV show.
Sketchy Sketcherton (Pt. 1)
Thursday - nothing too exciting in the morning, just walked around getting coffee and pastries from Pompdour. I walked down Gaien Higashi Dori towards the Tokyo Tower and along the way I found Bar Milwaukee which had some really sketchy looking guys outside. I wanted to grab a picture to send to Erin Frank, but I didn't want to take a picture of the guys outside the bar, so I walked around a bit more and eventually came back to take the photo. The original guys were replaced with two new guys and four women that (I'm assuming) were either prostitutes or strippers. They cleared out and I was able to take my picture of the sign for Bar Milwaukee.
I headed towards a Hard Rock Cafe, and in a span of 30 seconds I had four different women come up and rub my arm and offer me "massagee" (sounds like massage-e). Roppongi has a lot of gaijin which means clubs, massage parlors, etc. that cater to tourists and businessmen that like a little companionship during their visit to Japan. My good Catholic upbringing kicked in, so I hustled past the massage technicians and decided it was time to get back to the hotel.
Catherine had booked a bus tour for the four of us in the afternoon, so around 11 we met up in the lobby and grabbed a cab over to Jarrett's office so we could have lunch. We went to a nearby restaurant and ate soba noodles with tempura - including a fried leaf for both Catherine and Erin - while sitting on tatami mats. After lunch we walked to the ANA Intercontinental Hotel to grab our tour bus, and the four of us sat on a couch to wait for the bus. Conversation included but was not limited to the pros and cons of Common's socially conscious rap, what Japanese guys put in their hair to make it look the way it does, and whether or not the guy sitting across from us was wearing lifts in his shoes (he was).
The bus tour had five sections but Matt and Catherine had a dinner planned so we had to skip the last two, but that was OK because Matt and I had already visited one (Akihabara) and the other was the place where they make the plastic food for restaurants. Plus you do not get out of the bus for those stops, so all things considered we weren't missing much by skipping those two locations.
Our first stop was the Hama-Rikyu Gardens in Chūō. The weather must have been in the mid-to-high 70s at this point in the day, so it was nice to get a little bit of shade when walking around the park. Our tour guide Keiko showed us a 300 year old pine tree, and then a tea house which Catherine and Erin found very exciting because it was featured in an episode of Top Model. I was more interested to hear that the paper used to line the doors of the tea house is made from mulberry, and that the paper stays naturally white even over many years, and that the paper absorbs moisture during humid weather and releases that moisture when its dry outside. Fascinating! We had a little free time to walk around the park and then we hustled to get back to the bus before 3:10, which was apparently very important as Keiko repeated it about 25 times.
Next up was the Sumida River Cruise. The river boats are all very low profile, and our boat had the lowest ceiling I have ever seen. It was probably no more than five feet tall, so Matt had to bend over at the waist to walk to our seats. During the cruise we went under maybe 7-8 bridges, some of which only gave a couple feet of clearance between the top of the boat and the bottom of the bridge, which explains why the boats are so flat and the ceilings so low. We got off the boat at Asakusa and had a chance to look at the Toyko Sky Tree (which is still being built), the Asahi Beer Hall (which is designed with yellow windows to make it look like a beer mug), and its "golden flame" which I thought was a yam but the locals all agree is in fact a poo. Originally the flame was meant to stand up vertically but building codes would not allow for that, so they just laid the flame on its side and the end result is pretty awful.
The last stop on our abbreviated tour was the Asakusa Kannon Temple, which was very cool. We entered via the Kaminarimon or "Thunder Gate" which is flanked by two statues and contains a huge (1500 pounds huge) lantern suspended between the walls of the gate. We walked through the gate and down the street which is lined with shops where Catherine bought a kimono for Camille and Matt bought a samurai headband for his brother John. At the end of the shops you exit into a courtyard which leads to the inner gate, Hōzōmon. A couple dozen pictures and one green tea ice cream for Erin, and we were into a cab and back to the hotel so Matt and Catherine could make their dinner appointment.
Gonpachi / Kill Bill Vol. III
Wednesday - after walking around all morning, I didn't do much in the afternoon other than walk to the AM/PM to get a bunch of snacks: green tea, some shiny orange crackers, a strawberry "crispy (ice cream) sandwich", and a chocolate bar called Crunky! If I get hungry for more ice cream I am definitely going to try the "vanilla and bean" flavor crispy sandwich next time. Will it be a normal vanilla bean ice cream or a weird mix of vanilla ice cream and fermented nato bean? Only time will tell. After getting back to the hotel room I killed off all my snacks, and then zoned out for a couple of hours, until it was time to head out to dinner with Catherine's friend Jarrett who lives in Tokyo.
Catherine, Erin and I met up with Jarrett at the Oak Door on the 6th floor of the hotel complex to grab a beer before going out to eat. Matt had to pass as he spent the entire day coughing like Doc Holliday in Tombstone. After a quick drink we headed out in a cab (my first cab ride in the four days I've been here) to the restaurant. One nice thing about taking the trains is that you have a better feel for where you are in the city compared to a cab ride which is pretty mindless. It turns out we were heading to Shibuya which is where I had been the night before, although this was a different area so I didn't see any familiar sights.
We got out of the cab and went up to the 14th floor of the Space Towner to the restaurant, Gonpachi. After we had been seated and grabbed some drinks Jarrett mentioned that this restaurant was the inspiration for the restaurant scene in Kill Bill. Actually - it was based on Gonpachi Nishi-Azabu which has the upstairs private rooms featured in the movie, but the style of the two restaurants are very similar. Jarrett's wife and daughter met up with us at the restaurant, and we had a nice dinner of skewered meat (chicken thigh, chicken breast, chicken wings, beef, tuna), skewered vegetables (tomatoes, peppers, okra, onions), tempura, and french fries (for Catherine).
After dinner Jarrett walked us over to a bar nearby so we could grab a drink, but they didn't have enough open seats to fit Erin, Catherine and myself so we just walked up to a main road and grabbed a cab back to the hotel. I thought for a second about going out for a walk or trying to find a place to grab a drink, but I figured that was enough for one day and decided to call it a night.