I was visiting Toronto and Montreal for the past bit here. I was originally up for Torontaru in Toronto, then off to Osheaga in Montreal, saw a bunch of cool bands which played for the first day of the event (Hyphen Hyphen, DIIV, Daughter, Two Door Cinema Club, Ellie Goulding, some obnoxiously bad electronic music), stayed in Montreal for the weekend, and then came back Toronto afterward. I was hanging out with various people along the way, and I ended up extending my stay to about three times as long as I initially anticipated. It was a very eventful period, with very little breaks in between.
I am on the train back to Sarnia tonight. This was an adventure for me, and I'm returning home for some much needed rest. Thank you, everyone. It was great to hang out with everybody this past week and a bit, and I hope that the feeling was mutual. Both Toronto and Montreal are awesome, and I wouldn't mind returning to either some day, if I am welcome to come back again.
If there is one thing this journey has taught me, it's that something needs to change for me soon. My recent life has been a colorless, amorphous, convoluted mess, where most days have felt indistinct from the rest. My social life has been in this painful standstill, my inspirations have been drying up, and I've felt really shitty. I've become awkward and chronically tired, and have forgotten how to interact with people without feeling lots of anxiety. These things have followed me for a while lately, and maybe it's wishful thinking, but I feel that I need a new environment. I need a change of scenery, a change of pace, something. If I can be invited and welcome, and not feel the desire to constantly move somewhere new every 6-12 months, that would be a relief.
In any case, I may as well consider my next move soon, instead of continuing to atrophy, by sitting idle in this familiar territory of laziness that I presently reside in.