#toxic coach

[hananiichobani]

Craving something? Sip some water and wait 20 minutes to see if you’re still craving it.

[kamagica]

Memories are seldom remembered,

emotions have more clarity.

Like happiness, which paints me with its brush.

My hazy childhood was bright with color.

Halcyon heaven exists for me,

toddling through tiled halls.

Three-legged races,

won every year at field day.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Optimism rides on my shoulder,

as I enter new terrain.

Of course, the locker wouldn’t work on my first day.

It’s two years later, when despair riddles my chest.

The first time is always the worst,

yet comfort is held in one thing, a statement:

I will never let this happen again

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Lachesism sweeps me off my feet.

If only it could break my body.

A ball flies to nowhere

I just can’t throw myself towards it.

A little damage is what I want,

but you won’t see me doing anything about it.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Silence.

I need to say something, anything.

But to whom?

The ones who survived with me?

No, they won’t talk about it

No one will talk about it.

Am I the only one who thinks it's wrong,

that no one is talking about it?

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

“So what?” says spite, licking its lips.

The urge to do better, be better than any expectation she had for me

Is overwhelming.

It pushes me to work towards the future,

letting the past become evanescent.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Happiness readies its brush once more.

I race out of the building, sprinting towards the ones I trust.

Ecstasy is spread on my face

When was the last time I smiled like this?

I look at them, the ones who I truly care for,

and once again, my world is filled with color.