Hey, I fear my question might be weird. In my country you can try different therapists before deciding for one. And although I already have been diagnosed in psychiatry, I always had a hard time making it clear to those test-therapists that I need help. Some therapists even kicked me out because they believed I was faking it (pretty badly). There is always this question (in one way or another): "What do you think is wrong with you, what do you want to fix" and I just have a vague feeling of an overall un-wellness. I have been mentally ill for most my life and I don't have a "before" to which I can wish to go back or compare my now-state to. I feel like I have less energy than other, feel less joy, more anxious, bad self image. Just... A lot more of the bad feelings that everybody sometimes has. I can't describe my issue in proper words. And for some therapists that is a sign that there is no issue. I also don't feel comfortable, explaining it with my old diagnoses because they are pretty old. I have the suspicion for a mental illness that I could have but I wouldn't feel comfortable just walking in "Heeeeyyy, I believe I have c-ptsd, could you check?". Self diagnoses are pretty unpopular amongs therapists.
I am planning to give the therapist-search another shot the next weeks but I... don't want to be kicked out again because I can't explain my issue. Are there any good words that come to your mind, that I could use?
Hi anon,
Thank you for reaching out and I’m so sorry that you’ve had such hurdles in your journey for seeking help and support for your mental health. From personal experience with medical trauma, I’d like to share an article about “red flags” in therapy - and I hope at the very least it might help validate that you absolutely should be not only allowed, but encouraged, to ask questions about your diagnosis (and if you need an updated one), as well as the specifics of a treatment plan.
Of course it’s very understandable that without feeling safe, the appointment could feel so jarring that even if you meet a kind one, it could be hard to convey what you’re looking for.
My first advice would be to ask if someone can go with you, someone you feel comfortable with, and who you might even be able to practice a dialogue with beforehand.
Even if they can, or cannot come, my second piece of advice is to have your questions written down as well. Worst come to worst, if you feel unable to verbally share your concerns, perhaps you could slide them over so they can reply.
My third piece of advice is to ask for a print out of the after visit summary, with clear instructions and follow up to what the next steps might be - something you can refer to in the future as well.
You are correct that in my own experience, some medical professionals are a bit weary of self diagnosis’ but many more are curious to ask, with genuine compassion, “And why do you think that might be?” And pause, waiting for you to share your symptoms.
So my final piece of advice on how to broach the subject, is sharing the symptoms you are currently experiencing - and then at the end, simply state something along the lines of, “I am concerned this might be c-ptsd, and would like to be tested for it.” (as in, don’t even it word your request as a question that requires their permission, because it doesn’t).
If they deny you the opportunity to test, have them put into writing why not, that is your right - and then get a second, and a third opinion. Because most medical professionals want to help you see an ease of your symptoms, no matter what it is, and I would hope this new one would want the same for you. Either way, I hope you get the answers you’re seeking, and the support you deserve. Best of luck.
