I did an undercut on my hair. It feels nice

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I did an undercut on my hair. It feels nice
Hey, are there systems out here who knows how to deal with grief ?
Like, me, a fictive, grieve my dead older brother from my source and I can't move on and it's horrible both for me and my host (my source is their comfort show and they can not not interact with it but it keeps triggering me when it's question of my older brother)
okay i know they're just fictional characters but i did dissociate hard when he died in canon (fanon doesn't touch us). he was our brother ffs